11 Old-Fashioned Traits Of Men Who Always Seem To Get Good Women
Good old-fashioned chivalry can go a long way.
Jose Calsina | Shutterstock Have you ever scrolled through social media and stumbled upon a cute couple video, only to see men in the comments wishing they could find a woman like that? Nowadays, it's common to see guys admiring relationships they wish they could have. But let's be honest — dating has changed significantly over the past two decades. What once were sweet, simple videos full of date ideas have turned into trollers and social media arguments about why someone would dare take their date to the Cheesecake Factory.
Yet, there's still a lucky group of men who always seem to attract high-quality women. What sets them apart? It's not just about luck — it's about their actions, gestures, and how they carry themselves. If you want to step up your game and attract a great woman, start by embracing these timeless traits that good men consistently embody.
The 11 old-fashioned traits of men who always seem to get good women:
1. They're thoughtful and make meaningful gestures.
Ana Blazic Pavlovic | Shutterstock
Men who consistently attract great women are thoughtful, remembering small details like favorite flowers or surprising them with personalized gifts. Being considerate is a quality that never goes out of style — especially in today's fast-paced dating world. If you want to attract a high-quality woman, start by showing you care.
Whether you like it or not, there's a reason shows like Bridgerton are popular — good women love thoughtful men who remember their favorite flowers and surprise them with cute, thoughtful gifts. Yet, that's probably because similar people tend to attract.
Studies show that couples with similar traits are more likely to stay together. In a 2023 study, researchers analyzed over 130 traits across millions of couples and found that partners were increasingly likely to be alike, specifically between 82% % and 89%.
Unfortunately, finding someone thoughtful and considerate isn't as easy as it once was. In the modern world, most people who want to date follow a formula: pick a decent place, chat, and possibly never see one another again. Consequently, many men have stopped putting in effort, believing that it won't succeed regardless.
However, if men genuinely want to find a good woman, then being a thoughtful and considerate man is the best place to start.
2. They practice chivalry and old-fashioned courtesies.
Nikolas Otto | Shutterstock
Chivalry isn't dead — good women are drawn to men who still open doors, pull out chairs, and show respect in their actions. Historical dramas showcase these timeless gestures that women still admire today. Men who embrace these traditional courtesies often stand out in a world that has moved away from them.
From offering his arm to taking off his hat, many good women quietly yearn for a love characterized by respect. However, such love appears to be uncommon these days. Professor David P Schmitt, Ph.D., argues that women may exhibit more chivalry than men. He explained that women are known to be more pro-social, charitable, empathetic, agreeable, and value benevolence more than men.
Knowing this, is it truly a shocker that many men don't behave chivalrously? After all, if men can't even compete with women in being chivalrous, why would their standard of being a gentleman equally correlate with a woman's standard?
But that doesn’t mean men can’t bring back chivalry and reclaim it as their own. By adopting these old-fashioned courtesies, men not only stand out but also show that they value respect and care for others. Simple gestures like holding the door open or offering a kind word can make a big difference in creating a meaningful connection, especially with a woman who appreciates those timeless acts of consideration.
3. They're reliable and keep their promises.
insta_photos | Shutterstock
Dependability is a crucial trait that men who attract good women often share. An emotionally available man who keeps promises and supports his partner through tough times is seen as trustworthy and responsible. Cultivating emotional reliability and holding yourself accountable are essential for building strong relationships.
In times of failure — whether flunking a class, losing a job, or having a disagreement with a close friend — women seek men who provide reliable support. After all, nobody likes to feel alone. Having a support system can mean the difference between thriving and failing.
Still, many men were never taught how to properly support women because they were never taught how to connect with their emotions. As a result, they freeze when confronted with situations that involve emotional support and dependability.
If men truly want to be more reliable, they must begin by taking responsibility for their actions. A great way to achieve this is by using behavior or feeling-tracking apps. These tools can help individuals recognize their emotions and understand when they're feeling a certain way, all while learning how to respond to those feelings in a healthy way.
A 2017 study reveals that many individuals resist change because they fail to monitor their actions. The researchers discovered that individuals who logged their fitness activities were more likely to persist in these behaviors, experiencing increased motivation and self-confidence.
Knowing this, men who want good women can develop better habits by researching tools to improve their mental health and behavior.
4. They stay calm in high-pressure situations.
insta_photos | Shutterstock
Men who handle stress with composure are perceived as confident and secure. Good women appreciate a man who can maintain his cool under pressure, as it indicates emotional stability. Keeping calm and showing resilience during stressful moments is one of the most attractive traits you can have.
A study in Personal Relationships revealed that both men and women rate confidence as highly desirable. The researchers suggested that this preference is likely due to the association of confidence with competency.
However, men who react impulsively without reflecting on how their behavior affects others lack emotional control. Consequently, they often find it challenging to attract good women, as they fail to treat them kindly during stressful times.
Often, they blame women for being emotional, prompting good women to leave when instability arises. Because of this, men tend to shift blame to these women instead of accepting responsibility.
The good news is that emotional control and resilience are skills that can be developed with practice. Men can build stronger, more stable connections with women by learning to pause, take a breath, and respond thoughtfully rather than reacting impulsively. This makes a man more attractive and shows that he can be relied upon in tough times — something every good woman values.
5. They treat everyone with respect and kindness.
VGstockstudio | Shutterstock
Men who consistently show kindness and respect to everyone — regardless of status — are seen as trustworthy and caring partners. Given the rise of negativity in online spaces, being kind, respectful, and courteous stands out, making you more appealing to quality women.
On the surface, treating others with respect and dignity should be obvious. Unfortunately, the rise of red pill content has caused a good portion of men on social media to harass, disrespect, and degrade women.
According to the report, The Impact of Social Media on People of Color (POC), Women, and LGBTQ+ Communities, 57% of people have seen posts calling for violence based on a person’s race, sexuality, or gender.
Additionally, UN Women reported that one in three women worldwide experience physical violence by a partner.
Consequently, good men who want good women should understand the importance of treating everyone with the respect they deserve.
6. They prioritize family and close relationships.
fizkes | Shutterstock
A man who values and supports his family is often seen as someone who can offer stability and care in a relationship. Whether caring for aging parents or spending time with loved ones, a family-oriented man tends to attract women who value connection and loyalty.
Men show plenty of green flags. From reading books to being compassionate, there are plenty of ways a good woman can identify a good man. Yet one of the most appealing old-fashioned traits to women is a man who prioritizes his family.
A man who values his family is probably kind-hearted and prioritizes relationships and responsibilities above everything else. He is expected to go to great lengths to meet his family's needs and maintain strong bonds.
Many men rarely consider how their behavior around their family affects women's views of them. In the heat of the moment, they are just fulfilling societal expectations. Nevertheless, many women, particularly those of higher character, notice how these men treat their families.
7. They show gratitude and appreciate the little things.
simona pilolla 2 | Shutterstock
Men who express gratitude for life's big and small things exude positivity and happiness. Studies show that gratitude fosters better relationships. Consistently showing appreciation boosts happiness and makes one more attractive to potential partners.
Most men might not know this, but expressing gratitude is admirable. It shouldn't be surprising to know people who are grateful for the little things in life always attract good women.
According to Harvard Health, research in positive psychology found that gratitude is strongly associated with happiness. Because of this, good women tend to gravitate toward grateful men, as their positive energy affects those around them.
If men genuinely want good women, it's best to start small. Men should make it a goal to express gratitude once a day. Creating a gratitude journal is another excellent option to improve their appreciation. According to associate faculty member Jessica Koehler, Ph.D., writing down a few things men are grateful for is the best way to practice gratitude daily.
8. They lead with integrity and strong principles.
Ground Picture | Shutterstock
Leading with integrity is one of the top traits women look for in a partner. No matter the situation, men who stay true to their principles are seen as reliable and trustworthy. Integrity builds respect and creates a foundation for a lasting relationship.
Most people have values that they refuse to compromise on. Whether refusing to disrespect others or lying for profit, an old-fashioned trait of men who always seem to get good women is that they lead with integrity and keep their principles intact.
Good women like consistent men. They want to know who a man is and, most importantly, his values. Yet, all too often, it's easy to compromise those values to keep peace or impress others.
According to a YouGov survey, around 49% of Americans identify as people-pleasers. This is dangerous, as engaging in people-pleasing tendencies can quickly cause the best of people to crumble under the weight of other people's expectations.
So, if a man wants to do a better job keeping his integrity intact, then increasing their confidence is the only way to get there. According to a 2017 study, this can be done through positive thinking, talking to other confident people, and increasing their knowledge.
9. They respect boundaries and personal space.
Prostock-studio | Shutterstock
Understanding and respecting personal boundaries is crucial in any relationship. Men prioritizing consent and space are likelier to create trusting, healthy dynamics. Being mindful of physical, emotional, or mental boundaries shows a level of maturity that good women find attractive.
Most people struggle to respect boundaries. They hug others without consent or touch people's hair or belongings without permission. This is why good women get excited when they meet men who respect their boundaries and give them space. They're attracted to thoughtful men and, most importantly, men who recognize and respect others' personal space.
Understandably, this might not seem very pleasant or romantic to some men. After all, constantly asking, "Is this okay," can be frustrating and awkward. However, if men are serious about wanting a promising woman, they must change their behavior. Otherwise, good women will pass them by because they lack consideration.
10. They listen actively and value others' opinions.
Pheelings media | Shutterstock
Active listening is key to building strong connections. Men who listen without interrupting and genuinely value others' perspectives are more likely to foster meaningful relationships. Good women are attracted to men who make them feel heard and respected in personal and romantic settings.
People want to feel listened to and valued for their opinions, but many men forget that connection starts with communication and listening. Agree or disagree, the only way to build those things is through attentive listening.
A study in 2023 found that listening helps develop relationships, as it encourages prosocial behavior and feelings of value.
To some, listening to a woman might seem obvious. Yet, the unfortunate truth is that many men unintentionally exclude good women because they're eager to express their opinions. Because of this, good women are often left feeling disrespected, unheard, and, frankly, unimportant.
To avoid this, men should ensure that the woman they're communicating with is finished talking before they interject. If this happens accidentally, that's okay! Most good women won't mind the slip-up as long as he apologizes and allows her to continue speaking.
11. They remain humble and avoid boasting.
Jaem Prueangwet | Shutterstock
Confidence is attractive, but humility is what truly sets men apart. Good women appreciate men who are confident in their achievements but remain humble. Acknowledging others' contributions and showing gratitude for success demonstrates self-assurance and grace.
Nobody likes a bragger. For example, it can be annoying to hear a man boast about how much money he has at a party or work event. Instead, a good woman would much rather spend time with a humble man.
Unfortunately, some men don't know how to balance the two and, as a result, can come off as cocky or insincere. To avoid this, men should ways give credit where credit is due.
For instance, a man just got accepted into a top university. Instead of saying, "Wow, I'm so amazing, but it was obvious I would get in," he could say, "Wow, I can't believe I got in! I'm so grateful to my parents for supporting me. Thanks to them, I worked hard and got accepted."
That's a lot to say and think about at once. Still, the best way to remain humble and confident is to acknowledge his success and effort while thanking those who contributed. This will not only make a guy appear humble but also help him remain confident, as he can acknowledge his own hard work in the process.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.