Men Who Have Incredibly Happy Partners Always Do These 10 Things Right
Happy partners aren't born, they're made.
Yuliia Martynovych | Unsplash In the most technical of terms, "Chivalry, or the chivalric code, is an informal, varying code of conduct developed between 1170 and 1220 [associated] with the medieval Christian institution of knighthood ... Over time, its meaning in Europe has been refined to [emphasize] more general social and moral virtues.
The code of chivalry, as it stood by the Late Middle Ages, was a moral system which combined a warrior ethos, knightly piety, and courtly manners, all combining to establish a notion of [honor] and nobility."
I find chivalry to be a marvelous thing. And most women I know feel at least a little like-minded, too. We love our modern independence in life and love. But, deep down, we want a man who will do a few things right to ensure his partner is happy.
And, as most women will attest, chivalry has become increasingly rare. Gentlemanly behavior sets our hearts ablaze. We want to see it, we want to see much more of it, and many of us are waiting on it, if a bit impatiently.
Men who have happy partners do these things right:
1. Hold the door for you
The other day, I was headed inside a building when a dark-haired guy with glasses noticed me a few steps away from the door. He waited for me to catch up, then held the door open and stepped aside, allowing me to head in first. I don't see this much anymore, living in a liberal area with a younger populace.
And yeah, I swooned. I slowed down, looked him in the eye, and thanked him.
In actuality, I wanted to shake his hand or give him a bear hug or something profuse in return for being so darn chivalrous (don't worry, I didn't). Note: I have the same reaction to men pulling out chairs and lifting heavy objects for me.
2. Calls when he says he will
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We women are used to waiting for his call ... and waiting, and waiting, and checking our phones. And waiting, and waiting. And checking to make sure our phones are functioning. And waiting, and waiting.
There's nothing more infuriating. Women crave reliability, but we no longer anticipate it. When a guy says he will call at 5:30 PM, we just think, "Ha! Okay." If he calls at 5:30 PM? Well, cue the giddiness. "This one's a keeper!" we squeal in our heads with an incredulous grin.
When someone promises to call and follows through, it is crucial for building trust and fostering positive relationships. It demonstrates reliability, respect for the other person's time, and a commitment to communication, reinforcing a sense of dependability and strengthening the bond between individuals.
Researchers from the University of Texas at Austin explained that repeatedly failing to call as promised can erode trust, create feelings of disappointment, and damage the relationship dynamics.
3. Doesn't play games
There's nothing more attractive than a guy who doesn't beat around the bush. He lets you know he's into you and he's confident enough that he doesn't care about playing it cool.
He likes you, he's excited about you, and he wants you to know it. Amazing? Uh, yeah.
4. Expresses interest in meeting your family and friends.
We know a man's serious if he will gladly meet Mom and shake hands with Dad. And then meet all of our friends, happily tolerating the one we know he secretly can't stand.
We see he's not a fan of her sarcastic quips, but the fact that he's putting a smile on makes us feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships concluded that a partner's desire to meet your family is considered a significant indicator of commitment and seriousness in a relationship. It reflects their willingness to integrate into your social network and seek approval from essential figures in your life, which is often tied to a deeper level of investment in the relationship.
5. Shows small, public gestures of affection
Most women don't want an all-out PDA. That makes us as uncomfortable and queasy as any man does.
What we do, however, love a guy who will grab our hand on the street or give us a quick peck on the cheek. It's adorable. We appreciate that he loves being with us, and we think it's rather fantastic that he wants others to know he does, too.
6. Makes sure you get home okay
Imagine this: He's not waiting three days to call you. He's calling or dropping you a brief text just to make sure you're home and safe.
Oh, and he also walked you to your car in that shady parking structure/dark parking lot (because those locations are scary — like, horror-movie scary).
7. Offers you his jacket when you're cold
I grew up watching rom-coms, and seeing the guy give the girl his jacket always made me smile. I'm freezing constantly and I loathe it.
So if a guy is willing to brave the cold and give me his cozy means of protection — whether it be a worn-in cable-knit sweater or a long, wool coat — just to comfort me and warm me up, I can't even begin to express my bountiful gratitude.
8. Pulls the car around for you when it's raining
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It takes a long time for us to do our hair and makeup. We'd rather keep it intact, you know? Enough said.
This is generally considered a thoughtful action, especially if you must walk a significant distance in the rain to reach your car. Walking long distances to get your vehicle can be uncomfortable and potentially unsafe in heavy rain, so having someone drive it to you can be appreciated.
Research published by Utah State University explained that acts of kindness within a relationship significantly contribute to increased relationship satisfaction, trust, intimacy, and overall well-being, with studies showing that consistent kindness is a key predictor of relationship stability, particularly in the context of romantic partnerships.
9. Steps in during awkward situations
My friend found herself riding a bus a few weeks back with a guy nearby who was "creeping on her," so to speak. Another man, a perfect stranger, stepped in and got Creepy Guy to back off.
Sometimes, it's hard to break away from awkward situations like that. As women, we like to feel safe, like someone has our backs. When a guy goes out of his way to help a lady, it's pretty much our favorite chivalrous gesture.
10. Cares about your opinions and shows you respect
Women know when we're being taken seriously. We can tell when a guy wants to know more about us, more about what we believe, and more about how we think and react.
We can tell when a man values our opinions and respects what we bring to the table at any stage of a romantic relationship. It's what we look for most in a guy and how we know when we've met our match.
A partner who cares about your opinions is strongly linked to a healthy and fulfilling relationship. It fosters feelings of being understood, valued, and connected, contributing to higher relationship satisfaction and positive emotional experiences within the partnership.
A study published by Current Opinion in Psychology on perceived partner responsiveness refers to how much a person feels their partner actively listens to and considers their thoughts and feelings.
Jenna Birch is a freelance journalist for women’s magazines and national websites, focusing on topics like health, wellness, dating, relationships, beauty, and lifestyle.