11 Ways To Leave A Good Impression On Someone In 30 Seconds Or Less
Be ready to think fast. What someone thinks of you is often set within the first seven seconds of meeting them.
Dikushin Dmitry / Shutterstock We can’t control whether or not other people like us, no matter how kind and considerate we might be. Even so, there’s definitely value to showing up as our genuine, caring selves if you want to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less.
Assessing other people according to our first impressions is a foundational part of human nature, stemming from an evolutionary need to evaluate risks quickly and keep ourselves safe. Studies show that first impressions are typically made within the first seven seconds of meeting someone. Perhaps unsurprisingly, those first impressions aren’t always accurate. Our subconscious biases often lead us to put other people in boxes, defining them by harsh stereotypes. Making a good impression, one that comes from a place of truth, can pave the way for people to see you for who you really are.
Here are 11 ways to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less
1. Smile with genuine warmth
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Smiling with sincere warmth is a way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less. When you enter a new social situation with a smile, it signals that you’re approachable and open to getting to know new people.
Research conducted by Princeton University psychologists Janine Willis and Alexander Todorov revealed that people form first impressions in one-tenth of a second, just by looking at a stranger’s face. While we don’t have much time to make a good impression, starting with a smile is a solid approach.
While smiling is an entry point to making a good impression, there’s a delicate balance between making people feel comfortable and making them feel creeped out. A genuine smile sends an emotional message; anything else is just a hollow grimace.
It’s pretty easy to know when someone is smiling for real. Their smile is wide, not pinched at the edges, and their eyes light up in a way that makes you want to smile back.
It might take more than a smile to foster true, lasting friendship, but a truly warm smile plants seeds for a deeper connection.
2. Display confidence
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Another way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less is to display confident body language. According to biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, people can judge someone else’s confidence level in seconds flat.
“The brain is very well built to try and size somebody up immediately,” she explained.
Closed off body language, like crossing your arms over your chest or hunching your shoulders, sends a clear message that you’d rather be anywhere else. It not only reveals how uncomfortable you are, it also shows a lack of confidence.
The way you hold yourself reflects how you feel about the person you’re talking to, and how you feel about yourself. As Fisher pointed out, “Your self-confidence tells a lot about your emotional stability.” Yet there’s a distinction between healthy confidence and having a big ego, and most people can sniff out which is which within 30 seconds of meeting you.
Someone with false confidence will spend those 30 seconds trying to convince people that they’re totally perfect, which widens the gap between them and everyone else. True confidence comes from accepting yourself as a flawed individual, who’s worthy of love and respect, even with their imperfections.
3. Be curious
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Being curious is a way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less, yet it’s important to express your curiosity in a respectful way. Getting too personal too soon, pushes people away, but meaningful questions that aren’t overly confrontational pave the way for making a real connection.
Life coach Alex Mathers shared that curiosity is a key part of having incredible social skills. He pointed out that saying things like, “Tell me more about that,” shows that you genuinely care about the person you’re talking to and you want to get to know them on an even deeper level.
According to Mathers, inquisitive statements keep our hearts and minds open, allowing us to “look for the glimmer of gold inside the emotion” we feel in response to what’s being said.
“More curious people tend to report higher levels of life satisfaction and positive emotions,” he explained. “Actively cultivating curiosity can contribute to greater well-being and a sense of fulfillment in life.”
4. Practice active listening
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A way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less is to practice active listening. Thoughtful, substantive conversations run on a sense of flow. There’s an innate give and take to every conversation, something that requires a level of self-awareness, so you know when you speak up and when to stay quiet.
Active listening shows that you’re acknowledging and absorbing what someone else is saying, not just waiting for them to stop talking so you can share your own opinion. Alex Mathers also pointed out that active listening creates a clear path for effective communication, since “you’re talking with someone instead of talking at them.”
Active listening is a way to cultivate genuine connection, which makes relationships stronger. As Mathers noted, “active listening fosters a sense of being heard and understood, builds trust, and allows for better comprehension of the speaker's message.”
5. Stay present
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Another way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less is to minimize distractions and stay present. Psychologist Guy Winch shared a surefire technique to make a good impression in an instant: put your phone away and be fully present with the person in front of you.
“Stealing glances at your phone… signals that you’re not fully listening (at best) or that you’re distracted and disinterested, neither of which will endear you to the other person,” he explained.
True friendships take continued effort and considerable time to unfold, but not being present is a way to tap out before a new friendship has even begun.
“Being friendly boils down to being agreeable, making people feel comfortable and welcome, and making them feel accepted, understood, and valued,” Winch concluded. Being mindful leaves people with more than just a good impression. Giving someone your complete attention is a rare gift, one they’re sure to remember for way longer than 30 seconds.
6. Say their name during the conversation
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Saying someone’s name during a conversation is a way to leave a good impression on them in 30 seconds or less. It’s a simple and considerate gesture, showing how much you value meeting them.
Names are a core part of a person’s identity, and saying their name out loud demonstrates respect.
While casually dropping a person’s name into the course of conversation can enhance connection, saying their name too often is off-putting. The impression you’ll leave will be less attentive and friendly and much more disingenuous.
7. Match their energy
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A way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less is to match their energy. Coming in too strong to a calm environment disrupts the vibes and makes people feel uncomfortable.
If you’re overly excited or visibly elevated during a chill hang, it gives off the impression that you can’t read the room. By not matching other people’s energy levels, you ultimately take up too much space, which leaves people feeling drained by your presence rather than nourished and uplifted.
8. Share what you’re passionate about
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Sharing your passionate side is a way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less. It might feel vulnerable to open up so soon, but telling them about the things that bring you joy makes you memorable. Your weird little interests are what allow you to access your fullest self, which is a special thing to witness.
Being transparent and sharing your inner world enhances trust and brings people closer together.
Radical honesty may feel uncomfortable, but it is effective. Sharing your intense passion for finding mid-century modern furniture at antique stores or talking about your endless devotion to bubblegum pop and industrial metal in equal measure is a way to honor your passions, spark intrigue, and bring people in.
9. Validate them
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Emotional validation is another way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less. Making light of someone’s feelings or denying their experience is a dismissive and damaging way to treat other people.
Clear, caring communication is the key to every relationship, which can’t exist without validation.
The way we talk to each other has a powerful impact on all aspects of our relationships. As psychologist Guy Winch explains, "When someone is upset or angry with us, whether justifiably or not, the most productive thing we can do is to validate their feelings because doing so will make them far more receptive to our side of things."
10. Be authentic
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Being authentic is a way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less. It might be cliche, but there’s undeniable truth to what Oscar Wilde once said: “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
When it comes to meeting new people, putting your true self forward is more important than anything else. Presenting a false front to impress someone actually has the opposite effect. The only thing it will do is leave a bitter taste in their mouth.
Professional Certified Coach Janelle Anderson shared that being truly authentic comes from embracing everything you are.
“You must be very much at home in your own skin, with who you are at your core,” she explained. “Once you get there, you will no longer try to be someone others want you to be. It is a journey getting there, but nothing is better than just being you, and loving who you are.”
Self-love can’t be contained. Its warm glow emanates outward, making you magnetic and drawing other people in. In its truest form, your self-love can guide others to love themselves, too. In this way, being authentically yourself is like opening a window to let sunshine stream through, and leaving it open for everyone else to feel the glow.
11. Express gratitude
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Expressing gratitude is a way to leave a good impression on someone in 30 seconds or less. Letting someone know how lovely it was to meet them is more than just a polite thing to do. It’s a way to reinforce the impact they had on you, while revealing a tender part of yourself: The part that wants to stay in touch and get to know them more.
Gratitude is a transformative force. Expressing it and receiving it creates the kind of connection that can truly last, the kind that can change your life.
Alexandra Blogier, MFA, is a staff writer who covers psychology, social issues, relationships, self-help topics, and human interest stories.