11 Secrets Brilliant People Know To Keep To Themselves
Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is not say anything at all.
insta_photos / Shutterstock True brilliance isn’t based on test scores, good grades, or performance reviews. Intelligence is about much more than any external marker, which is one of many secrets brilliant people know to keep to themselves.
Brilliant people know that the keys to success come from within, which is why they trust the journey they’re taking. They’re patient, humble, and communicative, because those values keep them aligned with their goals. They rely on their inner strength to guide them, and ignore any outside noise that might distract them.
Here are 11 secrets brilliant people know to keep to themselves
1. Emotions are messengers
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Brilliant people know that the secret to their success stems from emotional intelligence. While other people interpret difficult emotions as a sign of weakness, brilliant people see their emotions as messengers. They invite their feelings in, which allows them to understand their motivations better.
According to psychologist Nick Wignall, “People with low emotional intelligence think about difficult emotions as problems to be solved… this only makes you more fearful of your emotions and reactive toward them in the future.”
“Emotionally intelligent people see emotions as messengers, not threats,” he revealed. “The best way to free yourself from painful emotions is to validate them and let them work themselves out instead of trying to control them.”
Brilliant people channel their emotional intelligence as a guide. They know that pushing their emotions away out of fear only makes them come back stronger. They understand that every emotion exists for a reason, and they stay curious about their feelings, which helps them move through them.
2. Listening is a superpower
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Some people believe that being the smartest one in the room means being the loudest. They think that brilliance is measured by how often they speak and how forcefully they share their opinions. Yet the true secret of brilliance isn’t in what you say, but rather, how you listen.
As career and life management consultant Ruth Schimel pointed out, “Listening helps boost trust and understanding. It promotes learning and opportunities. A foundation for intimacy and closeness, listening can also strengthen most relationships.”
While listening might seem like a passive activity, being a truly good listener is an active role. Good listeners are responsive. They ask open-ended questions and relate to the emotions beneath the words the other person says.
“Your listening is a great, intangible gift to give to others and to yourself,” Schimel concluded. “Once you improve and apply your listening skills, you’ll open windows and doors to new possibilities and richer relationships in most areas of your life.”
3. Feedback leads to growth
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Receiving feedback with grace might not be easy, but it’s the secret to learning more about yourself and growing as a person. Brilliant people know that their success depends on their ability to adapt, and that adaptation is impossible without listening to feedback from others.
As psychologist Nick Wignall shared, “Genuinely self-aware people have the humility to understand that they can’t always see themselves objectively. And they know that often the best way to be more objective about yourself is through the lens of other people.”
Self-awareness and brilliance go hand-in-hand, which is one of the secrets brilliant people know to keep to themselves.
4. Hard work is more important than talent
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A secret brilliant people know to keep to themselves is that their innate talent isn’t as important as the hard work they put in to cultivate that talent. Their natural gifts lose meaning if they don’t channel them toward something greater than themselves. Brilliant people know that the secret to success is to keep trying, even when they hit setbacks.
Positive psychology practitioner Lisa Newman shared that “a growth mindset allows you to be open to reflection, to notice and celebrate even slight improvements, and to be better able to embrace life’s challenges.”
Brilliant people rely on an attitude of growth, as opposed to believing they’re incapable of change.
5. Collaboration is the key to success
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Being cutthroat and competitive is often seen as the way to win, but brilliant people know that the secret to success is working as a team. Collaboration has its fair share of challenges. It requires people to take a step back, stay open-minded, and truly hear what others have to say.
While it might seem easier to go it alone, truly brilliant people know that their success depends on how well they work with other people. There’s strength in numbers, just as there’s inherent value to working in a collaborative way.
6. Self-awareness is a gift
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It might seem scary to know your own mind, but brilliant people know that secretly, it’s the best thing you can do for yourself. As psychologist Nick Wignall revealed, “Self-awareness isn’t something you’re born into. It’s something you build through practice.”
“Self-aware people are curious about their own minds and how they work. They frequently think about their thoughts and thinking patterns,” he explained. “This is called meta-cognition. It means you are aware of the fact that you’re thinking things and able to assess the quality and usefulness of that thinking.”
A big part of brilliant people’s secret to success comes from understanding their own patterns and working to improve themselves on a consistent basis.
7. Failure is part of winning
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A little known secret that brilliant people keep to themselves is that failure is a stepping stone to winning. Every time they try and fail, they learn something new. They see mistakes as more than just moments of being incorrect. They see them as chances to change and adapt, which is why flexibility in failure is so crucial.
Brilliant people know that winning doesn’t happen overnight, it’s a long and involved process. They know that every failure is a portal for their future success, as long as they’re willing to see the opportunities that present themselves.
8. Asking questions is better than having answers
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Another secret to brilliant people’s success is the power of asking questions instead of having all the answers. They know that admitting what they don’t know is a sign of strength, not a weakness. They know that asking questions is the only way to gain more knowledge and better understand the world around them.
Some people want answers, but brilliant people want to ask questions. They want to know why things work the way they do, and then, they want to change them.
9. Self-care is serious business
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An essential secret brilliant people know to keep is that self-care is a much bigger deal than bubble baths and face masks. As psychologist Nick Wignall revealed, true self-care is about “establishing and maintaining habits and routines that support your emotional health and well-being.”
“Successful people understand that doing your best work depends on being emotionally strong and mentally sharp,” he explained. “But more importantly, they know that those things require time and investment. If you want your mind to work for you, you need to work for your mind.”
Taking care of your mind, body, and spirit is a main theme in every brilliant person’s success story.
10. Big ideas always start small
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Brilliant people know that every big idea comes from one small question: “What if?” They ask themselves what their version of the world might look like, and they entertain every idea that floats into their mind, no matter how small or silly it seems.
They take chances and build up their ideas into something even bigger. They plant seeds and tend their gardens over time, because they know that’s the only way to flourish and grow.
11. Kindness opens doors
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Self-compassion is the secret tool every brilliant person uses to pave their way in the world. They truly believe that treating themselves and others with kindness and understanding is what allows for their success.
They know that everyone holds value, whether they’re brilliant or not, and that everyone deserves to be heard and appreciated for what they believe in.
Alexandra Blogier, MFA, is a staff writer who covers psychology, social issues, relationships, self-help topics, and human interest stories.