10 Little Things That Make People Stop Taking You Seriously Despite Your Best Effort
Don't give them the opportunity to doubt you.
VH-studio | Shutterstock Have you ever felt that no matter how hard you try, it doesn't seem like people are taking you seriously? You could be the most eloquent, knowledgeable person in the room, but if you struggle with expressing that succinctly and maturely, it can be easy for others to overlook what you bring to the table.
Credibility isn't just about what you say but also about how you say it and how you carry yourself in situations. That's why every small habit and behavior can affect how you're perceived.
Here are 10 little things that make people stop taking you seriously despite your best efforts:
1.Acting like you know everything.
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No one on this planet is knowledgeable about everything, and being aware of that while also prioritizing education and growth is something that other people value and notice. But, if you claim to know everything and decide to stop learning, you lose people.
The most intelligent people are often honest and transparent in admitting they don't know everything.
The only path to learning new things and expanding your mind is listening to and taking in the knowledge of those around you. If you can't do that, others will not take you seriously, even if you are intelligent and aware.
2.Always being available without setting boundaries.
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While it may seem that being constantly available means being committed and reliable, it can also suggest that one lacks the ability to adhere to certain boundaries and prioritize oneself in certain circumstances.
Being accessible 24/7 allows people to take advantage of you because they know you'll always say "yes," even when you want to say "no."
Dr. Leda Kaveh, a licensed clinical psychologist, explained that saying "no" and prioritizing self-care does not make you selfish or a bad person. "Saying 'no' is refusing to sacrifice something you love for someone else. It means that you're in control of your own time and emotions. That makes you more generous than someone who always does what others want them to do."
"Giving your body the break it needs is not selfish; it’s self-care. But saying "no" isn’t always easy. Sometimes, we feel guilty when we say "no" or are worried others will be mad or disappointed."
3.Failing to maintain proper eye contact during conversations.
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Maintaining good eye contact when conversing with someone can help you gain instant respect from others. It shows that you're engaged in what the other person is talking about and genuinely care about what they say.
On the other hand, having poor eye contact can be a sign that you're disengaged and uninterested, but it can be hard to exhibit good eye contact in the first place.
Arlin Cuncic, a psychologist, explained to Verywell Mind that for some people, maintaining good eye contact can cause anxiety. Cuncic even offered some advice for people struggling with maintaining good eye contact. "If you are talking to someone one-on-one (or looking at people within a group), choose a spot directly between or slightly above the listener’s eyes. If this doesn’t feel comfortable, try letting your eyes go slightly out of focus, which has the added benefit of softening and relaxing your gaze," she wrote.
"You can and should also look away occasionally. Staring too intensely can make people uncomfortable."
4.Constantly cracking jokes even when seriousness is needed.
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There is a time and place where cracking jokes and making people laugh is acceptable, just like there's a time and place where you need to be serious. It's okay to want to be someone responsible for lightening the mood, but if you're constantly making a joke about things, it can give the impression that you don't take things seriously.
Jared C. Pistoia, a naturopathic doctor, homeopathic practitioner, and author, told Psych Central that some people use humor to cope when they feel uncomfortable or uneasy. Traumatic events can affect your overall mental and emotional well-being. Trauma can sometimes feel unavoidably serious or could never be humorous, but humor can be used to improve trauma in some cases."
He continued, "Not all humor is beneficial, and humor can sometimes be inappropriate. Sticking to positive humor ensures that your jokes and perspectives will be well-received, but there are also cultural considerations."
5.Always making loud excuses instead of taking responsibility.
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Some people may not realize that constantly blaming outside forces for their behavior is doing them a disservice. If they blatantly refuse to take responsibility for their actions instead of owning their faults or mistakes, they become unreliable and won't be taken seriously.
There's power in taking accountability, apologizing, and promising you'll do better next time. Allison Reiner, a relationship coach, hypnotherapist, mentor, and speaker explained that people can live happier lives by taking accountability.
"The only successful way is to focus on yourself and begin to dig deep, get to know who you are, what you're capable of, and how you arrived at this point. What thoughts and beliefs drove your decisions? How can you change them? What are you prepared to do? Your life and your happiness are your responsibility."
6.Speaking without truly listening to others.
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The truth is that people don't care what you have to say if they feel they aren't being heard. There's value in practicing being a good listener; others will feel confident in confiding in you and trusting that you respect their thoughts and perspectives. If you aren't able to listen, it won't be long before people refuse to take you seriously.
Nick Wignall, a psychologist and writer, suggests some tiny habits that people can implement into their daily lives to become better listeners. Some of those habits include not treating conversations as if they were a competition, validating the other person's feelings, and being keenly aware of one's own emotions because becoming a good listener means being compassionate with oneself.
7.Neglecting to build new skills and invest in personal growth.
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We live in a constantly evolving world, which means that we have to adapt to the circumstances and ensure that our skills match what's expected of us. People take growth very seriously, and if you want to remain stagnant, that might be why others refuse to depend on you.
When you stop learning and decide to remain the same instead of investing in yourself, you show others that you aren't willing to make the effort to improve. If you're not interested in personal growth, then why should others be interested in relying on you?
8.Talking excessively without saying anything meaningful.
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We've all been conversing with someone who seems to be talking in circles instead of making a point that means something. Being the person who over-explains and rambles without providing substance or clarity causes others never to want to discuss with you or take you seriously.
That's why it's essential to think about what you have to say before you say it, and there's nothing wrong with remaining silent until you've worked out your thoughts succinctly. Being a thoughtful person who takes a moment before speaking or answering a question demonstrates to others that you genuinely care about being eloquent in your conversations.
9.Always trying too hard to impress others.
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No one enjoys interacting with someone who constantly tries hard to impress others. It's tacky and proves that you don't have a clear sense of self and aren't confident in your abilities. The more you try to show off, the fewer people will want to trust your judgment.
When you start taking yourself seriously, people are more likely to accept and take you seriously. This means having confidence even when you might not feel it and standing firm in your decisions. You shouldn't have to seek others' validation; trust your instincts and skills because they usually never steer you wrong.
10.Overpromising and underdelivering on commitments.
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One of the quickest ways to lose credibility and people refusing to take you seriously is being someone who makes all these grand proclamations but then doesn't ever follow through. It makes people hesitate to trust you to do things because you can't deliver results and instead deliver excuses.
The key to avoiding this is setting realistic goals and expectations for yourself that you know you can fulfill. It's about being honest when you can't do something and allowing someone else to help when needed. You'll be surprised at how much people appreciate that you can underpromise and over-deliver instead of doing the opposite.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.