14 Psychological Tricks Smart People Use To Gain Control In Any Situation

Smart people understand how the mind works and how to use psychological tricks to gain control in any situation.

Anticipating how another person will most likely react in any given situation gives you an advantage over others, giving you the power to frame everything in a way that will allow you to stay in command.

These are the 14 psychological tricks smart people use to gain control no matter the situation:

1. When someone partially answers your question, stay silent.

two women talking using psychological trick gain control staying silent Christina @ wocintechchat.com | Unsplash

People tend to avoid answering questions they don’t want to answer. Next time you’re in a situation where someone is doing this to you, rather than reiterating your question, experiment with waiting silently.

There’s a good chance that they will feel pressured by your silence and finish answering your question. Oftentimes, silence is louder than words.

2. When you want something from someone, frame it as an opportunity rather than a request.

smart man in conversation using psychological trick gain control framing request opportunity LinkedIn Sales Solutions | Unsplash

People will respond differently when an opportunity is presented in a positive way that benefits them. This is called the framing effect. As Ayesh Perera, a Harvard graduate and researcher, wrote for Simply Psychology, “The framing effect is the cognitive bias wherein an individual’s choice from a set of options is influenced more by how the information is worded than by the information itself.”

3. When meeting people for the first time, pay attention to their eye color.

paying attention eye color psychological trick gain control Eric Ward | Unsplash

Habitually taking note of the color of someone’s eyes when you meet them will ensure you look them in the eyes, thus making a strong, confident impression.

Making eye contact with people plays a huge role in mutual respect, interest, and communication. In fact, our eyes contribute just as much, if not more, communication to our conversations than our mouths do. Direct gaze conveys social cues and emotions, in addition to making a good impression, according to psychology professor Tara Well, Ph.D.

4. Remember and use people’s names when talking to them.

smart woman using names psychological trick gain control Brooke Cagle | Unsplash

People love to be acknowledged and remembered. When you address someone by their name in conversation, you are recognizing their identity and making them feel valued.

Addressing people directly with their names helps develop a strong relationship, but be careful, excessive usage might come across as ingenuine, invasive, and even creepy.

5. Have zero expectations when trying something new.

smart women zero expectations psychological trick gain control Christina @ wocintechchat.com | Unsplash

It’s easy to get excited about future possibilities and opportunities but having no expectations will serve you better in the long run.

While it’s important to manifest positive energy for the outcome of your desires, when you avoid having high hopes or expectations, you will avoid feelings of disappointment.

6. Pay attention to how people treat others.

smart woman paying attention people treat others during conversation psychological trick gain control LinkedIn Sales Solutions | Unsplash

How someone treats other people will tell you a lot about their character. Notice the way they treat those who can’t do anything for them in return.

Treating people with kindness and respect acknowledges their worth and dignity. Your behavior towards others also reflects on you, so it’s important to have empathy for others and live with integrity.

7. Wait in silence after stating your position in a negotiation.

smart woman negotiating waiting silence psychological trick gain control Christina @ wocintechchat.com | Unsplash

This is another way silence can work in your favor. As Leadership Speaker Selena Rezvani explained in a TikTok video, when it comes to negotiations, "whoever's more comfortable with silence wins."

Following your asserted position with silence will leave an impact and elicit strength and confidence. Avoid overexplaining yourself or using too many words, as it may cause your position to lose its value.

8. Chew gum while doing stressful activities.

woman chewing gum psychological trick gain control stressful situation Charles Wright | Unsplash

Chewing gum is proven to impact our minds in various ways, from increasing our memory to relieving anxiety.

When doing activities that can potentially increase anxiety or stress, chewing gum is a habit that will calm your brain.

9. When you learn something new, teach it to others.

smart woman teaching psychological trick gain control ThisisEngineering | Unsplash

One of the best ways to easily remember new things is by teaching them to others. This is called the protégé effect.

Teaching something new you have learned to others allows you to explain it in simple terms that someone else can understand. Doing this will impact your ability to remember this information.

10. Ask people questions about themselves.

smart woman asking questions psychological trick gain control Christina @ wocintechchat.com | Unsplash

If there’s one thing everyone loves to talk about, it’s themselves. An easy way to make conversation or fill in awkward silences is by asking people questions about themselves.

Doing this puts you in control of the conversation and allows you to get to know someone beyond the surface.

11. Force yourself to smile when you don't want to.

smart woman smiling psychological trick gain control Brooke Cagle | Unsplash

It is scientifically proven that your emotional expressions can impact your mood. According to Ronald E. Riggio Ph.D., smiling releases neuropeptides and neurotransmitters like endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin in your brain, which helps reduce stress.

It may not feel easy to do, but just by faking a smile, you are already enhancing your mood and lowering your stress levels.

12. Stand up straight to look and feel more confident.

smart woman standing up straight psychological trick gain control Dennys Lennon | Unsplash

Everyone falls prey to slouching and let’s be honest, it’s important to loosen up every now and then. But studies show that good posture is linked with confidence and assuredness, and body language has a big impact on your thoughts.

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13. Frame everything as a choice when it comes to kids.

smart dad using psychological trick gain control frame choice kid Zach Callahan | Unsplash

Kids love to be defiant and do things their own way. That's why the psychological way to get them to do something they may not want to do is by framing it as a choice, where they believe they’re in control.

For instance, rather than telling a child to clean their room, ask them if they would rather make their bed or put their toys away first. This might make the activity appear less dreadful, and it gives them the choice to decide what they’d like to start with.

14. Use the word ‘because’ when asking people for favors.

smart woman using word because psychological trick gain control Amy Hirschi | Unsplash

By explaining why you need a favor, it allows people to reason with you. When you have explained yourself, they’ll feel more inclined to want to help you.

As Jodi Glickman wrote for Harvard Business Review, “Even if the reason makes no sense or is unrelated to the request, people like to know why they’re being asked to do something.”

Francesca Duarte is a former writer for YourTango's news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. She covers lifestyle, human-interest, and spirituality topics.