8 Unique Habits Of People With Next-Level Confidence, According To Psychology
Truly confident people don’t just talk the talk — they embody habits that set them apart.
Good Faces | Unsplash There’s much I’ve learned over the last twenty years, going from a profoundly insecure teen to a confident man who loves life for the most part. A lot has changed for me. Confidence isn’t just about how you look or what you say — it’s about how you move through the world. Truly self-assured people have a unique set of habits that go beyond surface-level bravado, shaping their actions, mindset, and interactions.
They don’t seek constant validation or let fear hold them back; instead, they cultivate inner strength and resilience. Their confidence isn’t loud or boastful—it’s a quiet, steady force that commands respect and inspires others. By observing and adopting these habits, you can elevate your self-assurance and unlock new levels of success.
Please don’t feel ashamed of your current confidence level, regardless of age or where you think you should be. We all experience what feels like low self-esteem at points in our lives. By embodying these unique habits, you can take your confidence to the next level.
Here are unique habits of people with next-level confidence:
1. They rewire unhelpful beliefs that don't serve them
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What thought pattern do you continually entertain that makes you feel bad about yourself?
Often, a repeated line of thinking governs your perceived inadequacy. Maybe it’s something like, ‘I’m just not an intelligent person.’ There could be others, too.
We buy into these stories, which can hold tremendous sway in our lives, often without realizing how much they do. You must identify these pernicious thoughts and call them out by name. Why are they not true?
What evidence do you have to support the opposite belief? I.e. I am an intelligent person. You will find the evidence, and when you do, those beliefs will be instantly erased.
2. They write an achievements list and meditate on it
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As we’ll discuss shortly, your self-esteem needn’t rely on your circumstances. Your life doesn’t have to be a particular way to enjoy self-confidence.
But as a primer and for the purpose of lifting yourself out of self-critical thoughts that are likely swirling if you consider yourself to have low self-esteem, this is a valuable exercise. Many of us get so hung up on what we haven’t got that we forget to note what we have achieved.
Bringing past wins back into your awareness, no matter how ‘small,’ will help shift your perspective. Your wins are there. You must find them and give yourself the gift of realizing how far you’ve come.
Research suggests that writing down achievements and goals increases confidence by fostering a sense of accomplishment, reinforcing positive self-perception, and encouraging self-reflection, ultimately boosting self-efficacy. Writing about successes can help individuals reframe negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations, reinforcing their belief in their abilities.
3. They actively work to improve their health
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If you continually feel sluggish and also regularly eat processed garbage, you have an opportunity. Many of your woes will be solved here. Assess what you consume. You need to get real with yourself. What we eat counts in a big way.
My two cents is to veer towards the diet humans have been running on for millennia — less of this modern plant-based, seed-oil-infused, carb-heavy take-out stuff. More primal. More meat (ethically and locally sourced). But don’t take my word for it. One needs only to look into the research.
*If you feel good and rarely get sick on a plant-based diet, great — this is for those who don’t and are looking for solutions.
4. They're not obsessed with themselves
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Most of us are miserable because our commitment is to ourselves and no one else. Yes, we must prioritize our joy, but that’s different from being self-obsessed.
Turn your attention away from your own happiness and over to contributing to other people’s happiness. Something will switch in you.
How to do this? Creating things that others enjoy. It’s hard to feel low when you’re busy creating cool stuff and not worrying about yourself.
Research indicates that making and keeping commitments, especially to oneself, builds confidence by reinforcing self-belief and resilience through achieving small goals. A person with a clearly defined purpose finds daily stressors less threatening and has less difficulty deciding between options when reflecting on their purpose.
5. They understand the true nature of self-esteem
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Here’s the real kicker: self-esteem is an illusion. It’s a made-up concept we’ve cleverly constructed in our minds. We can thank decades of societal programming for this.
There’s no part of ourselves we can lose. Self-esteem creates the sense that we have ‘worth’ to lose.
We can’t, because it doesn’t exist in the first place. When we realize this and that we’re essentially indestructible, we are free. It’s all in the mind.
6. They plant themselves in the present
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If we’ve been depressed or anxious, we’ve likely been neglecting the bright, colorful beauty of the present moment. Here’s a cheeky reminder for you: it’s still here.
You just need the courage to let go occasionally and return. In the now, there are no worries — only life free of heavy meaning. Isn’t that refreshing?
Cultivating present-moment awareness, or mindfulness, can boost confidence by reducing anxiety, improving self-awareness, and enhancing emotional regulation. A 2018 study concluded this can lead to a stronger sense of self-efficacy.
7. They listen and follow through with their deeper inclinations
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Living life for others at the expense of following your passions is a one-way ticket to The Middle of Nowhere, USA. Listen to the quiet voice you keep ignoring.
You might feel it like a little buzz in your chest, too. Once you’ve identified what drives you, stop stopping.
You must be biased to create insane amounts of momentum. This will come more naturally when you find something that both interests and challenges you.
8. They constantly readjust their success parameters
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A huge source of suffering for many comes from how we define success for ourselves. We make it up our success parameters. And then we get sad when we fall short of the expectations we built for ourselves.
How are you defining what success should be for you? Are you following someone else’s playbook?
Forget them. They’re on their path, and you’re on yours. An example I like to use is writing online to grow your audience. Many people I work with write for a while but then get disappointed and quit.
Why? Because their definition of success in this context is for an article to be popular.
If not, they suck as a writer. But writing successful articles is hard, especially when you’re just starting. The parameter for success must be simply writing and publishing.
That’s a win you have full control over and is something of which to be proud. Make sure you define success for you in an attainable way and ensure you continually take steps in the right direction.
How?
- Create a better system that clarifies what actions you take.
- Be biased to plenty of action (automatically means rumination diminishes).
- Get on with it.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient. He's the author of the Mastery Den newsletter, which helps people triple their productivity.