People Who Make Excellent Villagers That Are The Backbone Of Society Never Do These 8 Things

Here’s to the villagers that never let you down!

Woman who is an excellent villager to her friend PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock
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The people who make excellent villagers in their communities are the ones who embody the true spirit of community, dedication, and selflessness. They are the ones who ensure the well-being of their neighbors and lend a hand without hesitation. 

These individuals understand the importance of every role in the village. They are the backbone of society, quietly holding it together through their hard work, kindness, and unwavering integrity.

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Rachel Lovely on TikTok knows this all too well because she has a mom who she says is a prime example of an amazing villager. She claims that to follow in her mom's footsteps, there are eight behaviors to avoid.

People who make excellent villagers that are the backbone of society never do these eight things:

1. Keep score

When people do favors for others, they might feel like they’re investing time, energy, or resources into someone else. In some cases, they may expect that favor to be reciprocated later. This is where the idea of "keeping score" comes in.  

For example, a relative might feel that they’ve sacrificed a lot for a child in their family, and later on, expect the child to repay that sacrifice in some way, whether emotionally or practically.

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Keeping score in relationships can introduce a level of transactional thinking that takes away from the naturally supportive nature of friendships and bonds. 

things excellent villagers backbone society never do keep score helping move Kzenon | Canva Pro

Leadership expert and author Frank Sonnenberg explained, "In any good relationship, people give willingly of themselves without an expectation of getting something in return. The reward is not personal gain but rather, making the other person happy. Of course, you will have periods when you take on more responsibility, and your spouse, friend, or colleague will do the same, but over the course of a lifetime, things even out. Will it come out evenly? Probably not, but that’s the point. The joy is in the giving."

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Healthy relationships tend to function best when favors are given freely and without the expectation of immediate repayment. This is why, when some of the best villagers do favors, it comes from a genuine place. 

RELATED: How Increased Individualism Is Making Our Villages Smaller

2. Expect the worst from people

If someone always expects the worst from others, they may inadvertently push people away. Their constant skepticism can create tension, as others might feel like they're being unfairly judged or mistrusted. A person who expects negative outcomes may avoid taking risks or embracing new opportunities because they anticipate failure.

People who make excellent villagers try to look for the good in people, even if it’s hard. By actively searching for positive behaviors or kindness, they shift their perspectives and build more trust with others. It’s about finding a balance between being cautious and allowing space for trust and positivity to grow. 

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3. Seek the spotlight

Excellent villagers prioritize the common good over individual gain. While they have their own needs, they don’t put their own desires above the well-being of the larger community. 

Great villagers don’t seek the spotlight for the good deeds they do. They are often the quiet, steady forces behind strong communities and societies. They embody a selflessness that makes them valuable without drawing attention to themselves. 

They don’t need recognition for their actions either because they are driven by a genuine desire to help. Their satisfaction comes from making a positive impact, not from receiving praise. For these individuals, the act of serving others is the reward, not the accolades. They find fulfillment in knowing that they’ve made someone's day better or helped a cause without needing a "thank you" or applause.

RELATED: Woman Suggests Our Society Is Designed To Force Us To Choose Between Community And Routine — ‘Something Has Always Got To Give’

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4. Expect immediate gratitude

A good villager's motivation for helping is rooted in a genuine desire to make a positive difference rather than seeking external validation. Their primary drive is to help others without expecting anything in return. They take action because they care, not because they expect praise or acknowledgment for it.

things excellent villagers backbone society never do expect immediate gratitude Nicole Schlaeppi | Canva Pro

These individuals don’t believe in drawing attention to their kindness or efforts. They are comfortable with others being recognized for their work and may even downplay their own contributions. Instead of looking for immediate recognition, they focus on the lasting effects of their actions. They know that gratitude will come their way when the time is right, not when they want it.

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RELATED: Mom Attends Baby Showers For Strangers Who Posted About Not Having Friends — ‘Building This Village Brick By Brick’

5. Complain about their role

Excellent villagers understand the importance of their role and are committed to fulfilling it. They don’t view their responsibilities as burdens, but rather as integral parts of the larger system or mission they are a part of. These individuals are flexible and capable of adapting to different situations without complaining.

They recognize the importance of personal growth and self-improvement. Great villagers are always learning, adapting, and evolving in order to better serve their community and themselves. They don’t take their role for granted. Even if the role is challenging or under-appreciated, they are grateful for the chance to contribute.

6. Take advantage of others

A great villager is aware of their community's needs and acts to support them. Whether it's volunteering, offering help to a neighbor, or standing up for social causes, they’re always ready to pitch in. They are generous with their time, resources, and skills. They understand the importance of sharing and contributing to the collective well-being rather than taking without offering anything in return.

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“Covert aggressors actively try to control others by deceiving and manipulating to get what they want,” said Diane E. Dreher, Ph.D. Unlike excellent villagers, who are individuals with a high level of empathy, which allows them to understand and share the feelings of others. They can put themselves in someone else's shoes and recognize the harm that could come from being exploited, so they avoid doing so.

RELATED: Overwhelmed Mom Concerned That 'The Village Is Collapsing' — 'Those Without Kids Aren't Offering To Help'

7. Disregard rules or laws

People with strong moral principles tend to follow rules because they value honesty, fairness, and doing what is right. They may view breaking laws or disregarding rules as an ethical violation.

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Great villagers respect laws and norms because they understand that the stability of a community depends on cooperation and respect for rules. They’re not rebels without cause. Great villagers take responsibility for their actions, whether at work, in their families, or within their community. They don't shy away from fulfilling their duties and helping others.

8. Neglect relationships

Being an active member of a community means being involved. Strong contributors don’t withdraw from the world around them. They engage with others and work together to improve things. Building strong, meaningful connections is key to being a solid member of a community. Excellent villagers don’t isolate themselves.

They nurture relationships, whether with family, friends, or neighbors. They own up to their mistakes and take the necessary steps to rectify them. They don’t blame others or shy away from accountability because they understand that accountability fosters trust and respect.

RELATED: It Still 'Takes A Village To Raise A Child' — But That Village Looks Completely Different For Today's Parents, According To A New Survey

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Sylvia Ojeda is an author with a decade of experience writing novels and screenplays. She covers self-help, relationships, culture, and human interest topics.