Couple Leaves Dry Wedding Early To ‘Go Out’ & Infuriates The Bride — ‘She Says We’re Disrespecting The Groom’s Sobriety’
“We don’t have a lot of time away from our kids. We wanted to let loose.”
Ljupco Smokovski | Shutterstock When a couple discovered that their friends' wedding celebration was alcohol-free, they decided to leave early and even encouraged other guests to join them in doing so. After posting their experience on Reddit, the couple was inundated with backlash, both from the bride and groom and fellow Reddit users.
The couple left their friend’s dry wedding early to have drinks with other guests, infuriating the bride.
“[We] went to a wedding in our college town for a member of our college friend group,” the woman explained. “My husband and I left the kids with my parents and we went.”
Renting a house with other college friends, she admitted they were excited for time away from their “real lives” — and to "let loose" and rekindle their college party spirit.
"On the invitation, it said the wedding went to 11 with an after party with the bride and groom at the venue." It didn’t include any mentions that it was a “dry event” without alcohol — the pair only realized that when they arrived at the venue.
Roman Chazov | Shutterstock
“No one told us this, and we were admittedly bummed,” she added. “When we found out, we told people we were going to some bars after and not going to the after party.”
“We left the wedding at 5:30 because we were itching to go out, and the wedding was boring," she wrote. "Pretty much the whole college crew left around that time and went out.”
Considering the groom is 2 years sober, the couple decided to have a dry wedding but their friends’ priorities disappointed them.
Despite having the entire weekend free to do whatever they wanted, the couple admitted to leaving early. Of course, their absence wasn’t taken lightly, especially considering they brought “all the bride’s friends” with them to the bar.
“Apparently, the bride's friend group did not stay for the party and the grooms did,” she wrote, “and the optics were very lopsided at the party. We all heard from the bride … and she said that she didn't feel supported and felt like we were [spiting] her now husband for his sobriety.”
Boryana Manzurova | Shutterstock
On a day that was meant to celebrate her marriage, and was admittedly the reason her entire college friend group was in town, they instead prioritized alcohol — at least, according to this bride.
“I told her that she was reading too much into it,” the poster continued. “We just wanted to go out.”
This bride’s anger makes complete sense. “I’m assuming she was looking forward to celebrating with her friends,” one commenter pointed out. “It’s a reasonable expectation of hers that you came to celebrate them … drinking shouldn’t be a necessity.”
While these parents were justified in wanting to enjoy their ‘night off,’ they should’ve been considerate of the couple’s wedding plans.
Considering the divisive nature of “dry weddings,” especially when it comes to online wedding discourse, it’s no surprise that many commenters debated about who was in the wrong. However, the truth is, this day should have been all about the married couple.
If these parents, excited about a night away from their children, wanted to leave a bit early and enjoy some drinks elsewhere — that’s perfectly valid. It can be difficult to get a truly restful night away from your kids, even when childcare is accessible.
However, bringing other wedding guests with them to the bar essentially ruined the couple’s wedding reception, invalidating their choice to be “dry” and celebrate without alcohol. It showed that their friends prioritized partying over celebrating their love.
Wedding etiquette dictates that if you are going to have a dry wedding, it's imperative to let guests know beforehand and to be prepared that it may be a disappointment and, in some cases, result in fewer attendees.
“I do think the couple should’ve disclosed the dry wedding before guests arrived,” one person wrote. “But, you were talking [crap] at her wedding, then formed a group to leave … and bringing a group with you? You’re a bad friend.”
Sometimes, we have to do uncomfortable and even “boring” things, as some commenters honestly admitted, for the sake of our friends. Whether it’s a work event, an art gallery trip, or a ceremony to celebrate their accomplishments — we’re not doing it to be self-serving; we’re doing it for them.
Weddings shouldn’t be any different. We’re going to celebrate their love — a glass of wine and a dance floor might be an added plus, but at the end of the day, it’s not about us.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a News & Entertainment Writer at YourTango who focuses on health & wellness, social policy, and human interest stories.