10 Old-School Pieces Of Marriage Advice That Still Hold Up Today

Successful relationships aren't missing any of these qualities.

Last updated on Nov 15, 2021

Old School couple, marriage advice. Getty Images | Unsplash
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Some relationships are strong enough to last a lifetime, and it's not attributed to luck or chance. It's thanks to continuous efforts from both parties and a desire to be together. Certain qualities should never be missing from a loving partnership, and once they are, it's only a matter of time before things start to fall apart.

There is no single secret to making a relationship last because it involves many other aspects that depend on one another. The key is whether you're able to maintain each of those parts.

Here are 10 old-school pieces of marriage advice that still hold up today

1. Be friends first

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A lasting friendship often equals a strong relationship overall because you share a deeper bond that goes beyond a romantic level. With friendship, you have a more durable foundation that's fulfilling on multiple parts.

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2. Cultivate trust

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If friendship is the foundation, distrust is what can seep in between the cracks and make it all crumble. Even if you and your partner check off all the other nine items on this list, your relationship will not survive without trust. No matter how good things are, one person's doubt is enough to drive the rest into the ground.

Studies show that couples with high levels of trust experience greater intimacy, better conflict resolution, and higher relationship satisfaction. In contrast, lack of trust can lead to negative emotions, anxiety, and relationship instability.

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3. Always respect each other

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This one should go without saying, but every healthy relationship should be built upon mutual respect. Both parties should recognize each other as equals and should always be open to their partner's thoughts, beliefs, concerns, and needs.

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4. Show affection

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The honeymoon phase of not being able to keep your hands off each other will naturally fade over time. But that shouldn't mean that affection should be completely forgotten. Verbal and physical reminders, such as saying "I love you" and touching when speaking, reinforce your connection.

Research highlights the significant importance of showing affection in marriage. It directly correlates with higher relationship satisfaction, stronger commitment, and a greater sense of closeness and security between partners. Affection acts as a key component in maintaining a healthy marital bond by fostering feelings of love, trust, and emotional intimacy.

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5. Teamwork will make your dream work

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One of the most common mistakes couples make is forgetting that they're teammates. Your significant other is your partner in life and, therefore, your greatest support system. You'll be much more successful by working with and not against them.

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6. Always be honest with each other

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The second either of you begins hiding things from each other, your relationship will begin to run off track. You should be able to share anything with your SO while receiving love and support in return. Secrets can become cancerous and snowball into further damage. You'll always carry a sense of guilt as long as you keep things to yourself, and your and your partner's dynamic is bound to be affected.

Being truthful with your partner is essential for building trust, fostering intimacy, and promoting overall relationship satisfaction. An analysis by Brigham Young University showed that couples who practice honesty tend to have smoother interactions, improved communication, and stronger bonds than those who engage in deception, even if the truth can sometimes be challenging to hear.

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7. Explore all forms of intimacy

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Intimacy is not only limited to being physical, although it does play a crucial role in relationship success. It comes in layers, becoming more authentic and sweeter with time and care. Intimacy requires a deeper understanding of each other that's far more significant than physical attraction.

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8. Never lose your playfulness

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You never want your relationship to get too serious, and not in terms of intensity. No matter how deep you are into things, whether it be marriage with kids or dating long-term, both partners should remember to maintain a sense of humor. 

Jokes that were once considered funny shouldn't one day be met with irritation. Keep things as lighthearted and playful as they were in the beginning.

Playfulness is essential in marriage, as it fosters positive emotions, strengthens bonding, improves communication, helps resolve conflicts, and contributes to overall relationship satisfaction. An article by Utah State University explained that playful couples tend to be happier with stronger connections.

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9. Support each other in all things

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You should always be each other's biggest cheerleader. Encourage your partner to go after what they want and ensure them that you'll be by their side no matter the result. By being excited about each other's achievements and celebrating even the little things, both parties benefit from a supportive relationship.

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10. Ensure your love remains unconditional

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True love doesn't come with rules and terms, so don't enforce any. At the end of the day, a relationship will not last if the couple doesn't share a meaningful love for each other on every level, including as individuals.

It doesn't work if you selectively love them as a parent but not as your friend, or as a teammate but not as your romantic partner. Together, your love should be well-rounded, abundant, and mutual.

Maintaining a sense of unconditional love within a marriage is crucial for fostering a stable, trusting, and fulfilling relationship. It creates an environment where partners feel accepted and valued regardless of their actions or mistakes, leading to greater relationship satisfaction and resilience in challenging times. However, a 2017 study found that it's important to distinguish between unconditional love and enabling unhealthy behaviors, as healthy boundaries are still necessary.

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Nicole Yi is a former associate editor at PopSugar. She oversees, writes, and plans all copy and content across channels for her company, an exciting e-commerce brand called Verishop.

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