5 Less-Obvious Signs You've Fallen Head-Over-Heels In Love With Her
Falling in love is sticky, it’s complex, and it almost always just sneaks up on you.
Toa Heftiba | Unsplash Ah, the elusive man falling in love with a woman.
The thing everyone wants to know about, but no one can properly communicate.
Falling in love is complex, it’s not straightforward. It’s sticky, it’s unintended, and almost always it just sneaks up on you.
I don’t know if most men go through these thoughts and feelings because I am but an island, trying to make sense of my world, and the world around me.
Men, here are 5 less obvious signs you've fallen head-over-heels in love with her:
1. You feel safe with her
Nothing beats going about your daily business knowing that your partner will fall on her sword to protect you.
Women, when they love one another, are fiercely protective, and as a man, knowing that you have the protection spell of your partner, forged in the fiery pits of Mount Doom, makes you feel safe.
Men are the physical protectors of the family unit, but we need to feel emotionally connected and safe when we do so.
There are reasons men are closed with their emotions and it’s not because we need to open up more — it’s because we need to meet the right person that we can open up to.
When I met Natalie at the beginning, in the first few months of us being together, it was the first time I had felt emotionally safe, ever. She has all my secrets close to her and I feel safe knowing that she won’t harm me with them.
Safety is a core element, and I feel it’s underrepresented in the male falling-in-love cycle.
2. You trust her
Trust is letting your partner go out with a bunch of male archetypes that get her juices flowing knowing that nothing will happen, and understanding that I’m the one that she’s going to come back to, and she’ll be excited to come back to me.
It’s a very empowering feeling.
I think building trust from the get-go intertwines your relationship and prepares you for the long term.
When I finally understood that we had deep trust in one another, then I knew I was in love.
3. You feel excited around her
I think I knew there was something deeper that I had with Natalie when I was excited to see her, even after three months into our relationship. I don’t think this wanes.
My son Alex and I went to London for a few days at the beginning of this year and when we traveled back, she was waiting at the train station for us. We were both excited to see her. Even after talking to her every day on the phone.
I can remember getting off the train, and Alex spotting his mum, and off he went — running as fast as his little legs could carry him. I would have done the same were I not carrying all of the luggage.
We were only gone for a total of two days, but it’s like I say to people, keep your relationship relevant and you’ll always be missing each other and finding each other again.
4. You can be honest with her
It doesn’t pay to lie. I’m not even one for white lies. I’ll find a way to wrap up the truth in something soft and fluffy.
I’m at a stage right now where I just don’t want to lie to Natalie because I know that it would harm what we have together. Why would I jeopardize that?
It’s being honest, truthful, and in the moment with your partner.
I’m honest with her because I know she has my back and of course vice versa. It’s a strong emotion and one that compels me to tell the truth all the time.
Lies only complicate matters and add an uncomfortableness to the relationship that messes with the safety of it all. Having honesty and knowing that your partner is honest is an amazing feeling.
5. You accept her imperfections
We don’t have a perfect relationship. If you think that we do, then we don’t.
Only just yesterday there were big arguments for waking me up at 5 am and the way I reacted to it.
Sometimes I can walk around like a bear with a sore head and have my family walk around on eggshells. Similarly, Natalie, for all her amazing traits, brings with her a strange mix of bad traits too.
You’d think with her being a teacher she’d have an unlimited amount of patience. Not so. When she wants something done, it has to be now.
And yet, with all our imperfections we still love each other all the more for it. We work together to better our faults. I’m trying to be less aggressive in the morning time, and she is trying to have more patience with me. We do these things because we love each other and want the best for each other.
That’s what love is — A partnership where two people support each other and only want the best for each other.
Raymond Baxter is a freelance writer, blogger, and former contributor to The Good Men Project and the Huffington Post.