Woman Hurt By Secret Santa Gift She Received From Colleague Since It Wasn’t As ‘Genuine’ As She Wanted It To Be
Bah, Humbug!
Harbucks | Shutterstock A Secret Santa is an arrangement in which a group of friends or colleagues exchange Christmas presents anonymously often under a certain budget. They are a popular activity in work settings, allowing co-workers to celebrate the season and boost morale.
These exchanges vary from company to company with some opting to gift random items while others offer employees to draw up a list of items that they would like so that their co-workers don't struggle with what to buy.
Unfortunately, what should be harmless fun doesn't always translate, which, let's face it, can be a common occurrence during the stressful holiday season. Case in point: The seemingly kind-hearted gift exchange that turned two colleagues and former friends against each other.
A woman said her feelings were hurt by the Secret Santa gift given to her by a colleague she considered a friend.
In a now-deleted X post, user Perfect Pisces shared private exchanges between her and her colleague McKenzie over the Secret Santa gift that she had received.
Pisces wrote, “Okay, so we had a Secret Santa at work, and one of my co-workers, who I also considered a friend, was my Secret Santa. I felt like our friendship was beyond work, so when I got my gift, I was a bit hurt by what I had received. I expressed myself, and honestly, I just want to know.”
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In the private message exchanges between the two colleagues it was revealed that the gifts in question were a scented candle and lip gloss. Both of these seem perfectly acceptable Secret Santa gifts for a workplace, right?
Not to Pisces. She took offense, claiming she was already written up for having candles in her office. Instead of smiling and accepting the gift graciously, she told McKenzie that she was hurt because they weren't "genuine."
The colleague claimed she 'put a lot of thought into the gifts.'
Here's the thing about office holiday parties and gift exchanges — you can't win. Whether it's financial constraints that force you to shop on a budget or the simple fact that not everyone wants to be friends with co-workers, the forced camaraderie can be a recipe for disaster.
Jessica Methot, associate professor of human resource management at Rutgers University, told New York Magazine, “The reason generally that managers would think Secret Santa is a good idea is because they see it as relationship building. The hope would be that those informal relationships would translate into better working relationships. It’ll keep people happier, it’ll prevent people from quitting, so it’s better for our retention rates; it just creates a more positive work environment.”
The problem with this idea, as Methot went on to say, is that most co-workers don't want the crossover between colleague and confidante.
However, this situation is slightly different in that the colleagues were friends outside the workplace. Whether or not it's actually true only Pisces and McKenzie know.
McKenzie defended herself, claiming she had put a lot of thought into the gifts for Pisces.
“I thought the candle smelled good, and it's pink, and it screams, you when I smelled it so I got it. I thought the gloss would look nice on you, that's why I got that color for you.”
Social media did not sympathize with the woman who was ultimately labeled 'ungrateful.'
Perhaps Pisces took her interaction with McKenzie to X in the hopes of gaining sympathy or at least a sense of vindication for basically telling her "friend" she hated the gifts, but that's not what she got.
Instead, she received vitriol from the general public, and they even called for Santa to bring her coal for Christmas. Ouch!
That's also likely why Pisces deleted her account and the exchange. But thanks to the magic of the internet, TikTok account @nosybystanders shared the exchange.
Unsurprisingly, commenters on TikTok weren't much gentler than they were on X. As one noted, "I mean it’s fine to FEEL that. To say it is a whole other thing." And another concurred, stating, "Not every feeling needs to be expressed. Some feelings are simply an opportunity for self-reflection."
And maybe that's the moral of the Secret Santa story. The issue has nothing to do with where the gift exchange took place or if the co-workers were even friends.
The reason the interaction caused such blowback was because people felt Pisces should have simply appreciated the fact that another person cared enough to get her a gift at all.
Remember that adage ... how does it go? Oh, yeah ... "It's the thought that counts."
Sylvia Ojeda, a writer with a bachelor’s degree in Screenwriting, has over a decade of experience writing novels and screenplays in the horror, dark comedy, and thriller genres. She reports on entertainment, news, and human interest topics.