Nurse Refuses To Chip In $70 For Her Dentist Boss's $1000 Christmas Gift — 'I Don't Even Know If I Get A Holiday Bonus'
Your hard work is Christmas gift enough — and it's the gift that keeps on giving.
Liliia Bila | Getty Images | Roman Samborskyi | Shutterstock | Neirfy | Canva Pro Have you ever worked in a place that gave the boss a Christmas gift each year? It's a strange tradition when you think about it — my co-workers and I are keeping your business afloat, and we're expected to give you a gift for doing so. That's… not how things work!
But of course, many others would counter that the boss is doing you a favor by giving you a job. That's not how things work, either. Nevertheless, tons of workplaces operate this way. But for one worker on Reddit, her office has taken this dynamic to a frankly shocking extreme.
A nurse is furious that she was asked to chip in $70 for her boss's $1000 Christmas gift.
Let me stop you right there: $70? For a $1000 gift? I've worked in a handful of places that did this sort of collection for the boss, including a very close-knit small business that had a much more casual and friendly approach to hierarchy than usual.
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But at no point was I ever asked to give more than $10 for a gift that was, like, a box of gourmet brownies or a really nice bottle of Scotch. Seventy dollars? A grand? I don't care if he's the best boss that ever lived; that is absolutely absurd.
Indeed, the nurse in question was so shocked that she took to Reddit to ask strangers if she was missing something, calling her post "a vent to see if this is as bizarre as I feel it is." Suffice it to say, not a single person on Reddit felt differently.
The nurse is only part-time and she isn't even sure she's eligible for a holiday bonus.
The circumstances of her job make this situation even more absurd. "I'm a dental nurse and I work one day a week at this office," she wrote, and she's only been working there for a year.
Nevertheless, she was included in a group text sent by the office manager "saying how the agreed upon amount for the doctor gift is 70 dollars per person and that the final day to bring her the money is Nov 24th."
That's a lot of money on its face. But then she did the actual math. "There are about 15 employees all together other than the doctor," she wrote. "This means the gift will have a value of around 1,000 dollars."
Adding insult to injury is that "there was no discussion in the office about how much to contribute; we were all simply told."
"What's more, "as a part-time employee, I don't even know if I'm included in holiday bonuses," she wrote. So she is flatly refusing to contribute and plans to tell them if they question her.
Even experts say that giving bosses Christmas gifts is inappropriate and a bit of an HR minefield.
There was little dissension among Reddit commenters on this. "Please don't be foolish and pay into this insanity," one person wrote. "They cannot manufacture your consent."
Others pointed out that as a dentist, her boss surely makes orders of magnitude more money than anyone else in the office, which the nurse confirmed. "I'd be shocked if he makes less than half a million dollars a year," she wrote.
Experts say that not only is this an unreasonable expectation, it's actually inappropriate — and maybe downright unethical. The boss/employee relationship is a power structure, and the employee is on the downside of that differential.
For this reason HR experts say that gifts from bosses to employees, and employees to each other, are perfectly fine. But giving gifts up the power chain to the boss wades into the dangerous territory of the quid pro quo variety.
You don't owe your boss anything but the work detailed in your job description anyway. Remember what Don Draper from "Mad Men" famously bellowed at Peggy when she scolded him for never saying thank you? "THAT'S WHAT THE MONEY IS FOR."
That works in the reverse order, too: The only reason you do Bosslady and Bossman's bidding is because they give you a pay and benefits package in return — one that is likely inadequate in the first place.
THAT is your boss's Christmas gift, and it's the gift that keeps on giving. How lovely and generous of you!
So, if your brown-nosing co-workers come around with the collection plate, just tell them, "Fa la la la la, la, la, leave me alone." Happy Holidays!
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.