5 Tiny Ways To Make People Like You In Less Than 2 Minutes
There's no huge time investment needed.
Zen Chung / Pexels Likability often starts with an initial impression, where people decide if you're worth spending any time and energy on within seconds. But is there a remedy for how to make people like you? What can you do to make first impressions last and have people like you as quickly as possible?
The book "How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less," by speaker and author Nicholas Boothman, highlights how to become instantly appealing and engaging to someone you just met.
Here are 5 ways to make people like you in less than two minutes.
1. Open both your body and your attitude
As we know, body language speaks volumes, and can affect the length and quality of personal interactions. When you convey to others with your body that you aren't interested in what they have to say, they will immediately notice, ultimately making the socialization a negative experience.
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On the flip side, leading with an "open" disposition can help you meet new people and make a great first impression.
Open body language exposes the heart, so having a positive approach and leading with your heart is crucial. Don't cover your heart with your hands or arms; instead, aim it directly at the person you're meeting.
As far as having an open and positive attitude, according to Boothman, "When you meet someone for the first time, you can be curious, enthusiastic, inquiring, helpful, engaging, and/or warm." The point is to keep things positive and uplifting, applying this mindset to your attitude and body movements.
2. Be the one to initiate eye contact
It can be challenging to look people in the eye, especially if you're a bit shy. And while avoiding eye contact with someone may indicate that you're attracted to them or want to get to know them, to the other person it appears as if you're uninterested in them altogether.
But initiating eye contact just enough (not so much that you make the other person feel uncomfortable) is a valuable skill to have. And it can make people feel more welcome and interested in talking to you.
Boothman told Houston Chronicle that he always looks people in the eye and notes their eye color. Eye color can reveal a lot about someone's personality, but beyond that, holding that eye contact throughout a conversation is shown to improve communication. And that's essential for being likable to others.
3. Don't forget to smile
Boothman suggests being the first one to smile, which sends the message that you're sincere. Smiling first makes you appear confident as well.
According to a survey conducted by Kelton Global on behalf of the American Academy of Cosmetic Dentistry, 48% of adults think a smile is the most memorable feature when they meet someone for the first time, compared to the first thing a person says (25%), a person’s clothes (9%), or the way a person smelled (8%).
Smiling gives people the impression that you're trustworthy. And whether you choose to smile with or without teeth, the impression is the same.
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4. Start things off with a simple 'hello'
Many people feel shy and awkward when meeting new people. And that's okay! But learning how to make people like you in less than two minutes means stepping out of your comfort zone.
Now, that doesn't mean you have to make grand gestures to get someone's attention; rather, it means starting with something simple.
In any new social situation, it comes as a relief when someone breaks the ice with a friendly greeting like "hi," "hey," or "hello." And this is exactly what Boothman says can help make you more likable.
After saying hello, shake their hand and say their name. Names are a huge part of our identity and it feels great when people use them. Plus, saying someone's name makes it more likely that you'll remember it.
5. Lean in
While you can lean in metaphorically, this is in a literal, physical sense. Leaning in when someone is talking shows that you're interested in what they're saying. On the other hand, when you're leaning back, it expresses that you're only partially listening.
To make people like you, that doesn't mean you have to tilt forward so much that you lose your balance and topple over. However, lean in enough to convey interest in what the other person is saying and what they're all about.
You don't have long to make a great first impression, but when you use your body language to your advantage, you can make new friends in just a few minutes.
Christine Schoenwald is a writer, performer, and frequent contributor to YourTango. She's had articles featured in The Los Angeles Times, Salon, Bustle, Medium, Huffington Post, Business Insider, and Woman's Day, among many others.