Executive Coach Warns Of The One Type Of Parent That Raises Socially Awkward Kids — But Those Kids Disagree
Children and parents both disagreed with him.
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A / Shutterstock Some kids watch their parents and want to be just like them. Others only see the things they want to do differently.
One executive coach argued that children who watch their parents act a certain way will almost certainly end up exactly like them. However, the actual kids weren’t so sure.
An executive coach explained that socially awkward parents raise socially awkward kids.
TikTok content creator Dan Martell described himself as an “entrepreneur, investor [and] coach.” In one video, Martell shared his thoughts on what exactly makes some kids socially awkward.
“If you’re an introvert, and you don’t talk to other people, I know what your child is gonna end up doing, and then you’re going to be upset that they don’t get ahead in life because they don’t have friends,” he stated. “They don’t have people that want to see them win because they don’t even say anything.”
“Most people won’t even know that kid’s in the room,” Martell argued.
He continued, “The amount of parents that I see raise socially awkward kids because they themselves are socially awkward …”
Martell said that many adults can’t even interact with their neighbors, which is detrimental for their kids to witness.
“Many parents don’t even know how to say ‘hi’ to their neighbor,” he said. “They can’t tell you their neighbor’s names. They can’t tell you who lives in their neighborhood.”
In this way, according to Martell, parents are failing children. “And then they wonder why their child grows up as a loner,” he said. “You didn’t show him how to say ‘hello’ to a stranger.”
Martell concluded his video with a stark warning concerning how children imitate what they see from their parents: “Monkey see, monkey do.”
Despite Martell’s insistence, many argued that he was incorrect.
Martell appeared very confident in his assertion that introverted parents raise socially awkward children. However, some of those very children he spoke of refuted his claims in the comments section of his video.
“My parents were both beyond social,” one person said. “Yet, I’m socially awkward.”
“My parents are both extroverts, but 3/4 of the kids are socially awkward,” someone else added.
A third commenter said, “I mean, my dad is an extreme extrovert, and I still ended up introverted and don’t talk to the neighbors.”
Parents also chimed in with comments about how Martell’s theory didn’t support the actual behavior of their children.
“This isn’t fully correct,” someone said. “I’m an introvert, but my son is extroverted.”
Another added, “I’m an introvert, and my daughter is nothing like me. Everyone knows her everywhere we go.”
“This is me and my kids are beyond extroverted,” another TikToker said.
Evidence does not necessarily back up Martell’s theory.
Some experts argued that more introverted parents could raise children who are not socially awkward but rather extroverted.
Psychotherapist Ilene S. Cohen wrote about this subject for Psychology Today. Cohen spoke from her personal experience as an introvert.
“As an introverted mother of extroverted children, finding the right balance between meeting your children’s social needs and conserving your energy isn’t always easy,” she said. “But with self-acceptance, open communication, supportive routines, and a focus on self-care, it is possible to create a harmonious environment where you and your children can thrive.”
Cohen’s very claim that she is an introvert with extroverted children refutes Martell’s comments. According to Martell, it is not possible to raise children who aren’t socially awkward if you’re an introvert. Cohen is a living testament to the opposite being true.
“It took me a while to understand that my introversion is not a weakness but a part of who I am,” she continued.
It’s unfair to assume that one group of people will raise a certain kind of child based on their personality traits. Everyone’s situation is unique, and your personality does not have to be dictated by those around you.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news and human interest topics.