8 Daily Habits Of Self-Assured People Who Trust Themselves Fully
You have to work consistently on your relationship with yourself.
Matthias Cooper | Pexels It can be hard to develop self-trust, especially when you're making decisions and engaging in habits that do you more harm than good, but there are ways to combat this.
Brittney Cobb-Farmer, also known as @ablackfemaletherapist across social media, broke down 8 ways people can gradually build trust with themselves.
Here are 8 daily habits of self-assured people who trust themselves fully:
1. 'Track the small wins'
Often, we overlook the smaller things we accomplish and only notice our shortcomings. However, focusing on our small wins can help us grow by allowing us to be proud of ourselves and recognize the times we act in ways that align with our true selves.
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As Cobb-Farmer noted, "Over time, these small wins add up, and reviewing them can provide a sense of evidence that you can trust yourself more than you may realize."
2. 'Learn to sit with discomfort'
Discomfort isn't exactly a good feeling, so it's natural to want to run away from it but it's sitting with it and allowing it to take up space that helps you grow. You need to process what is unsettling you without immediately trying to fix it.
Dr. Muireann Irish, Senior Research Officer at Neuroscience Research Australia, told The Huffington Post, "Mindfulness builds on the premise of maintaining a focus on experiencing the present, even if that means attending to the experience of negative sensations." While this might sound unpleasant, Dr. Irish stressed how sitting in the discomfort can change your brain's wiring and actually make you less impulsive.
That translates to better decision-making, especially in the face of adversity or stress.
3. 'Make small, everyday commitments to yourself'
Sometimes, we set large, seemingly impossible goals for ourselves and inevitably abandon them before we even try. That's why resolutions never seem to last.
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That's where setting small goals comes in handy. When you set small goals for yourself that are attainable, you set yourself up for success, and you slowly build trust with yourself.
Then, you can slowly increase your goals, and because of the trust you're building, it will become easier to meet goals that are more challenging.
4. 'Recognize patterns of self-betrayal'
Each of us has values we follow and needs that have to be met, but sometimes, we sacrifice our values and needs because we're self-sabotaging or putting others before ourselves. While it may be difficult, it's important to recognize these patterns of self-sabotage.
Ask yourself why you took that action, how it made you feel, and what feelings are contributing to the consistent pattern of behavior that is negatively affecting you.
5. 'Reconnect with past success'
It's easy to forget all the things we've been through and all the success we've had in the past when we face new challenges. But remembering that you've made it through tough times before will help you face whatever it is that stands in front of you.
Cobb-Farmer said, "Reflect on how those moments turned out and how they shaped your life. This reminds you of your capacity to trust yourself and make sound decisions."
6. 'Trust your physical body's signals'
You may have noticed it before: your heart beats faster when you're nervous, or you're stomach feels queasy when you're anxious. Your body sends out signals to you regarding your feelings, and learning to listen to these signals will benefit you greatly.
As WebMD noted, you know your body best and shouldn't ignore it when it tells you something isn't right.
7. 'Revisit your decisions without judgment'
Life becomes easier when you stop treating yourself like the enemy.
It's understandable to be upset with decisions you've made in the past; we've all done things we're not proud of at one point or another. But beating yourself up about decisions you've made isn't going to help you.
Instead, reflect on why you took that action and what you can learn from the experience in the future.
8. 'Cultivate a habit of self-validation'
When we experience new feelings after something that has happened to us or when we make a decision, it may be tempting to run off to a friend and immediately tell them what's going on. But practicing self-validation means sitting with our own feelings and processing them without external opinions.
Doing so can help you become more independent in the future and not rely on others so much for guidance.
Cobb-Farmer stressed, "This can strengthen your internal compass and help reduce reliance on outside validation for making decisions."
Sahlah Syeda is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.