7 Forms Of Self-Care You Don't Have To Feel Guilty About
Taking care of ourselves has been turned into yet another chore.
What is it about feeling guilty for resting, anyway? I hear it all the time. Everyone is so busy. You can't slow down, and when you do, for some reason, you feel guilty.
The good news is you can practice self-care, learn how to rest, and feel good about it without feeling guilty.
Here are 7 forms of self-care you don't have to feel guilty about
1. Have a moment of mindfulness
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This is about staying in the present. Being aware of your thoughts, emotions, bodily sensations, and surroundings moment by moment.
This also means taking time out of your day for yourself to meditate. I recommend starting with 10 minutes. You can meditate in silence or do a body scan.
This doesn't mean you’re doing nothing. You’re doing something for your mind by giving it rest.
2. Read a good book
Recreational reading is one of the most restful activities. If you have a hard time getting motivated to read, join a book club to help keep you on track. You can read anything. Just make time for it.
If you’re in a relationship, read a book with your partner. This will give you a lot to talk about. Or, you could read Audre Lorde and learn more about the origin of the radical self-care movement.
3. Listen to music
This is one of my favorite restful activities. In the middle of the day, I will stop and listen to some of my favorite songs. Sometimes, I sing along.
This is especially helpful when I am feeling overwhelmed and as though I can't make it through the rest of the day. You can also listen to music in the morning or when you get home.
Instead of listening to the news in your car, turn on a song. You will feel better and more rested according to a meta-analysis published in Health Psychology Review.
4. Spend time in nature
Spend time connecting with the outdoors. Go for a hike on a nearby trail, spend time in the ocean, or go for a walk in the park. If you can't do those things, spend time in your backyard. If you don't have one, buy a plant for your house.
A systematic review of mental health benefits of nature-based recreation in Annals of Leisure Research helps demonstrate how connecting with nature is important for your mind. You need the sunshine and fresh air, as well.
Touch the sand or the trees. Don't worry, you won't get dirty. This will help you connect with nature.
5. Do nothing and spend time being alone
When was the last time you looked at your calendar and had nothing scheduled? This fast-paced world can be demanding. You may feel guilty if you aren't doing something. If you believe that, your mind is telling you a lie.
You’re not a machine, and you’re not meant to go all the time. Go easy on yourself and put the brakes on. By doing this, you’re conditioning your brain to rest.
6. Spend time daydreaming
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This doesn't mean spending time stuck in your head with negative thoughts. This means spending time dreaming. Remember when you were a child and spent a lot of time daydreaming? You didn't have a list of reasons as to why you couldn't dream or do something. Let your mind wander like a child.
Even if the dream may seem too high to reach, still spend time dreaming about it, as supported by a meta-analysis of daydreaming styles and their implications for well-being in the Journal Of Consciousness and Cognition. Come up with all the reasons why you can do it rather than why you can't.
See what you come up with. The results may amaze you.
7. Light a candle
Even if you’re doing something, you can still light a candle. This will help create a relaxing environment. You will feel your mind and body relax.
Sometimes, when I'm writing in my journal, I light a candle. This always helps me relax. This is also a time when I turn off my cell phone. This is a great way to unplug.
You might be thinking this isn't possible. If that is the case, then take a look at your mindset. When did rest stop being a priority in your life? Are you letting others define how you spend your time? Meaning your partner, co-workers, or supervisor?
A study in the Journal of Applied Cognitive Psychology explores how it is important to rest, but it's important to engage in restful activities. Sure, you may have the eight hours of sleep down.
What types of restful activities are you engaging in? You will know if they're restful by how you feel.
Do you feel stressed out most of the time, or do you feel rested? Do you rely on caffeine and sugar to get through the day? If you answered yes, then it's time to make some changes. Your mind and body will thank you. Your friends and family will also thank you.
When you're stressed out, you’re more irritable. You’re also more prone to disease. Stress is a killer in America. You don't have to end up being a statistic.
This is your life and you have a say in it, so make sure you learn how to stop feeling guilty for taking some time for yourself. Making time for rest and self-care needs to be a priority in your life. Start with one of these activities today.
Lianne Avila is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist. She is dedicated to helping couples and has completed Levels 1, 2, and 3 at The Gottman Institute.