11 Odd Traits That Make Men Instantly Fall For Women, According To Psychology
Some of these traits are beyond your control, but some of them aren't.
Curated Lifestyle | Unsplash If you’re single, you’re probably used to hearing about the traits that make men instantly fall for women. People are full of wisdom, and always happy to tell you what you’re doing wrong.
If you’re going out all the time and serial dating like a maniac, you need to slow down and learn to be happy by yourself. But if you’re perfectly happy spending your nights alone with Netflix, pizza, and wine, you need to put yourself out there more and date as many people as you can. If no one’s told you yet that dating is a numbers game, they will soon — but although dating is a numbers game, these traits can help you.
Here are the odd traits that make men instantly fall for you:
1. Look like him
Yuri A / Shutterstock
It’s a well-known phenomenon: Research reveals we’re attracted to people who look like us. And we might even be happier in the long run with someone who looks like they could be our siblings. Odd, but true.
2. Look like his mother
fizkes / Shutterstock
Psychologist and researcher David Perrett found that people tend to be attracted to partners with the same shade of hair and eyes as their parents.
What’s more, people born to so-called ‘old’ parents (over age 30) didn’t prize youth as much as people raised with younger parents – good news for those of us still looking for love in our later years.
3. Look like his ex
oneinchpunch / Shutterstock
We like what’s familiar –—and that goes for falling in love, too. A 2011 study found that both men and women were more attracted to pictures of people who looked similar to their current or most recent love.
However, this was more true for women than for men, so don’t worry too much if his ex doesn’t look anything like you.
4. Be in the same league as him
AYO Production / Shutterstock
A 2011 study found that the more attractive a person is, the more likely he is to have high standards for his partner's attractiveness. As a rule, people want to date someone who is at least as good-looking as they are. So, that whole thing about being ‘out of someone’s league’ really may have some validity.
5. Remind him of himself
Olena Yakobchuk / Shutterstock
Turns out opposites don’t attract, after all. People like to be with partners who have a lot in common.
Explains Gian Gonzaga, author of an eHarmony study, “Partners who are similar in broad dispositions, like personality, are more likely to feel the same way in their day-to-day lives. This may make it easier for partners to understand each other.”
6. Be aloof
Gorynvd / Shutterstock
Researchers who conducted a speed-dating experiment found that men wanted women more when the women acted distant and uninterested. However, this only applied to women they’d already chosen to talk to — not the ones they were assigned to.
7. Pay attention to him
Mladen Mitrinovic / Shutterstock
On the other hand, relationship expert John Gottman says that couples who respond positively to each other’s ‘bids’ for attention stay in love longer; couples who divorced after six or fewer years together only responded to each other 33 percent of the time, while those who were still happy after six years had an 87 percent response rate.
8. Look happy
Miljan Zivkovic / Shutterstock
In a 2011 experiment, researchers asked more than a thousand people to rate photos of strangers according to their attractiveness. Men liked women the most when they looked happy and the least when they looked proud.
Interestingly, women rated men as less attractive when they looked happy, and more attractive when they looked proud. What’s up with that, ladies?
9. Talk with your hands
fizkes / Shutterstock
In yet another speed-dating study, researchers found that when women moved their hands and arms around a lot, men were twice as likely to want to see them again. So go ahead and gesticulate to your heart’s desire.
10. Smell good
Body Stock / Shutterstock
Maybe good isn’t exactly the word – you’ve got to smell right. Scientists have repeatedly found that people are attracted to each other based on how their sweat smells. This heady mix of pheromones and hormones alerts us to each other’s DNA makeup and cues us to breed with each other (or not).
11. Stare at him
LightField Studios / Shutterstock
When University of Massachusetts psychologist Joan Kellerman asked students to stare into each other’s eyes for two minutes straight, they were likely to report feeling passion, affection, and love for each other – even though they’d never met.
“This suggests that long periods of eye contact can connect you to someone and even ignite feelings of love inside you for that person you have never previously met,” reports research from Scientific American.
Elizabeth Laura Nelson is a writer based in Brooklyn, New York. Formerly the managing editor of Woman’s World and First for Women, she has written for numerous websites including xoJane, Elite Daily, YourTango, and more.