4 Rare Qualities Of Men That Deeply Impact A Woman's Heart, According To Psychology
These uncommon traits leave a lasting impression and create real connection.
Anastasia Shuraeva | Pexels Have you ever met a woman who watches romantic comedies and talks about how she wishes she had a relationship like “they do in the movies?” Many men can resonate with being in a position of making a romance just like the movies to win her love. Picture-perfect love stories tend to develop an overwhelming urge to be in a relationship just like the one in the film.
The trouble is, before you know it, trying to satisfy the craving for constant happiness dissipates as you realize you can never live up to the effortless, happily ever after that is an unrealistic reality. Thanks, Hollywood. Don't despair, there are other ways a man can impact her heart.
Here are the rare qualities of men that deeply impact a woman's heart:
1. Putting in effort
Putting effort into building the relationship you want is crucial. It’s a pretty straightforward concept; I agree, however, that continually putting in the extra effort is something that can be challenging to keep up day in and day out.
I’m sure you have heard the term “relationships are 50/50”. Wrong! A relationship will never be successful with a 50/50 mindset; relationships are 100/100. Each partner needs to put 100% love, commitment, and effort into the common goal of building a healthy partnership, according to studies from The American Psychological Association (APA).
It may not be your time to take out the trash, but put in the extra effort and just do it anyway. It may not be your role to cook or clean, however, take it upon yourself now and again to do it, so your partner doesn’t have to. It’s something so simple and so small, yet going above and beyond what is expected of you will foster a positive flow-on effect between the two of you.
2. Openly communicating
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This is probably the most important step in building a lasting relationship. The cliche “Communication is key” is thrown around a lot, but what does it mean and look like in a healthy relationship? The Handbook Of Communication And Social Interaction Skills explains that communicating is the key to knowing how your partner feels in your relationship.
In my relationship, we like to “check in” with each other. At the end of each week, we will sit down and talk about the past week. We will write down three positive things from the last week together and then we will write down three things that we can work on for the upcoming week.
This is where you put your pride aside and learn how to take constructive criticism. You do not get mad or upset about the things that the other says you need to improve on. If your partner says you need to improve in a certain area, then they are saying that for a reason. Do not get angry. Take it on board.
3. Being in the moment
Learning to be in the moment can be challenging for many relationships nowadays. With so much of our lives online, it is proving to be one of the main reasons for the disconnect between partners. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with enjoying technology. One of my partners and my favorite things to do in the evening is lay in bed and watch funny videos on Facebook together.
Where logging off comes into play is understanding there is a time and place for everything. Scrolling while your girlfriend is trying to tell you about her day over a lovely dinner is not the time to be checking your newsfeed. A study from Psychological Reports on the effects of phubbing (phone snubbing) on relationship satisfaction recommended logging off, putting your phone in the other room, and giving her your undivided attention. Be in the moment with her and enjoy your time together.
4. Putting in the time
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Last but not least, is putting in the time to build the relationship you’ve always dreamt about. An idea I firmly believe in is ‘what you focus on becomes your reality’. It’s impossible to expect a loving, genuine, strong, and committed relationship if you aren’t willing to put the energy and time into cultivating growth between the two of you.
Your work may take up a lot of your time or other commitments may drag you away from your partner however unless you consciously make the effort to set time aside to be together, you’ll eventually drift apart. You either grow together or you grow apart.
Try setting aside one night a week for date night, according to a study in The Personal Relationships Journal, which explored the maintenance function of shared relationship activities. At least two hours where you and your partner spend time together catching up and enjoying each other's company.
We lose the inspiration and dedication to create our desired relationship when we remember regardless if you’re a power couple chasing your dreams of world domination together or you’re just together seeing how things work out–intimate relationships and the type of feeling you want from them take constant and never-ending effort and hard work.
If you want a relationship that lasts, you have to be willing to work on the relationship daily. If you put in the effort, openly communicate with each other, be in the moment, and put in the time, you will be well on your way to having the relationship you have always dreamed of.
Tyler Leslie is a writer, blogger, motivational speaker, and author.
