7 Things Highly Intelligent Wives Have Zero Patience For
Respect and dignity are priorities for intelligent wives, among other things.
Ekateryna Zubal | Shutterstock When first approaching the question about what smart wives have zero tolerance for, marriage counselor Larry Michel was clear that he would rather not make the answer wife-specific or intelligence-specific. He feels both husbands and wives who are practicing emotional intelligence have zero patience for avoiding responsibilities, manipulation, gaslighting, dismissive communication, and a lack of growth.
However, not every romantic relationship is made of two emotionally intelligent people, and often the imbalance is biased against wives who must discover how much patience they have.
Here are the things highly intelligent wives have zero patience for:
1. Lack of emotional intelligence
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A highly intelligent wife will not tolerate an arrogant man who is controlling or emotionally detached. Ultimately, a highly intelligent wife thinks deeply, feels deeply, and loves deeply, so she expects a partner who can meet her at that level.
If her man falls short in any one of the characteristics above, his time is limited. If he falls short in multiple areas, then perhaps the only thing to keep her involved would be children and the necessity that they grow up as aware and conscious as their mother (and hopefully the father, too).
2. Passive-aggressive behavior
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Relationship coach Carolyn Sharp knows a highly intelligent wife often has zero patience for passive aggression because it undermines open communication and creates confusion. She prefers directness, as it allows for clear, honest conversations that foster trust and understanding.
By addressing issues head-on, both partners can collaborate effectively and resolve conflicts constructively, leading to a healthier and more fulfilling relationship.
3. Flimsy excuses
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Therapist Gloria Brame has observed how intelligent women can often detect when their husband makes up a flimsy excuse, whether it's why he didn't get a chore done or what took him so long to get home. How an intelligent woman may react on the surface varies.
Some women are more patient than others, but deep down she gets frustrated, angry, and feels insulted that he did not bother to think of a more credible excuse to explain his behavior.
She might still sense it isn't the whole truth and feel frustrated with him, but at least she won't think he is playing her for a fool.
4. Weaponized incompetence
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Gendered expectations disguised as 'natural roles’ can be deeply ingrained and lead to unconscious biases that affect task division, emotional expression, and power distribution, explains Regina F. Lark, Ph.D.
5. Emotional immaturity
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Couples counselor Siddharth S Kumaar recognizes how highly intelligent wives are intolerant of emotional immaturity and a lack of self-awareness in their spouses.
She wants her partner to resolve problems sensibly rather than turning to pouting, silent treatment, or pointless drama. She values emotional intelligence just as much as intellectual depth. She will rapidly lose respect if her spouse is unable to express themselves honestly, own their feelings, or control conflicts with reason and compassion.
She wants an equal, not someone who continuously needs to be emotionally watched. She does not want to be a therapist or a mother.
6. Shallow connection
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Siddharth S. Kumaar elaborates on the critical nature of emotional intelligence. In her relationship, an emotionally intellectual wife has no tolerance for emotional separation or limited closeness. Intimacy to her involves intellectual, emotional, and spiritual connection rather than only physical proximity.
She yearns for depth, meaningful dialogue, and a mate who knows her head as well as her body. She will quickly lose interest if her spouse views intimacy as a routine or only a physical act without involving her psychologically and emotionally.
7. Game playing
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A highly intelligent woman has no patience for games with her husband, explains senior editor Aria Gmitter. Marriage is serious business, and if he starts to play games with her mind, heart, time, energy, resources, or anything else, the relationship will no longer work.
It shows he has lost respect for her. He no longer views her as an equal or someone he must protect and look out for. He's diminished her opinions and role in their union to something a step above pity or contempt.
It may not show when he starts to twist the meaning of words to suit his agenda — whether it be a night out with the guys, or why he should not have to help with chores around the house.
When a man pursues his wife, he knows it's her he wants. So, the opposite is also true. When he decides to play games with her, and she knows he is playing games, but he pretends her feelings are invalid, there's no way to regain his interest.
A highly intelligent wife has to make certain decisions when this happens, which may be hard, but she knows dignity and respect are her priorities.
Will Curtis is a creator, editor, and activist who has spent the last decade working remotely.