6 Charming Things Wives Wish Husbands Would Do To Increase Their Confidence, According To Psychology
Husbands: Help empower your wife to embrace herself.
Curated Lifestyle | Unsplash Get ready to level up your relationship by being the supportive and nurturing husband she craves and helping her build a successful mutual future.
A husband can take a step back to deeply consider what his wife needs to feel assured in her self-confidence. By considering his role in her success, he will become a collaborator in all their next adventures.
Here are six charming things wives wish husbands would do to increase their confidence:
1. Practice listening to her
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Think about her feelings, and make time for her to talk about her feelings. Don't try to fix her problems, just practice listening, as supported by a study in the Journal of Family Psychology.
— Jennifer Hargrave, The Compassionate Divorce Attorney & Owner of Hargrave Family Law
2. No, really, truly listen to her
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Women often feel they aren't being heard. Wives, especially, wonder if their husbands really listen to them or if their words are ignored. Let your wife know you hear her and care about her preferences, feelings, and thoughts.
- You can mirror her words back at her so she knows you heard her.
- You can comment on the validity of her feelings.
- You can tell her you respect her choices or decisions.
- Stick to the truth and listen hard when she expresses a strong opinion.
A study in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin helps show how most people need affirmation from their spouses that their voice matters, even when they disagree with their spouse's opinions.
— Dr. Gloria Brame, Therapist
3. Prioritize making space for her true identity
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Whether their wife wants to channel their femininity or get in touch with themselves through self-care, kind-hearted husbands prioritize making and protecting that space for them. According to therapist Ashley Hudson, that's the key to a healthy relationship: acknowledging your partner's emotional needs and ensuring they feel secure.
Of course, every couple looks different, and every partner will want uniquely different things, but the kind habits of a husband who creates a soft life for their wife will always revolve around prioritizing comfort, safety, and security. Sometimes, that means giving her space. On other occasions, it means surprising her with an entirely planned date night.
They figure out what their partner needs to be their most authentic and self-assured self, and then they continuously prioritize those things — acknowledging, making space for, and celebrating that identity.
— Zayda Slabbekoorn, Author
4. Have regular check-ins
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I remember the summer when my husband and I decided to have a drink together every night after work. It was something we had stopped doing once our kids took over our lives.
The pattern was that he would come home from work, I would be in the middle of dinner and homework, and I would put him right to work. We would do everything we needed to do for the rest of the night, falling into bed, exhausted, barely having acknowledged each other. This only disconnected us.
So, make an effort to check in at least weekly with your partner and even more often, if possible, as suggested by the American Psychological Association. Learn about what is going on in each other’s lives and how each other is feeling.
What can you do to support each other? Rebuild your connection so you feel close to each other in a way you haven’t done for a while.
5. Never, ever lie
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Are you honest in your marriage? I said above that it is important that you always do what you say you're going to do, but it's more than that. For a woman to feel protected, she needs to feel trust. And if you can’t be honest with her, she can never trust you, as supported by a study in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships.
So, if you can’t get home for dinner, tell her. If you need to see your mother instead of going out with her friends, don’t make an excuse. Tell her the truth.
If you run up credit card debt, forget to bathe the kids, or need some time on your own, be direct and upfront. Tell her the truth right away. Let her know she can rely on you to be honest with her.
6. Create a safe space for her
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The concept of protection goes beyond physical safety. It encompasses emotional and psychological security as well. When women feel safe in their relationships, they are more likely to open up and reveal their vulnerabilities, allowing for deeper emotional connections.
This sense of security enables women to tap into their innate nurturing qualities, embracing aspects of their femininity that may have been suppressed or overlooked in a less supportive environment.
A review in the Epidemiology and Health Journal suggests how men play a crucial role in fostering this sense of safety and protection for their wives or partners. By actively listening, offering support, and creating a space free of judgment or criticism, men can empower women to fully embrace their femininity.
— Francesca Duarte, Author
Spouses are providers for each other through nurturing, creating safety, and lending an ear as well as a shoulder. When husbands grow more accepting of their partners, they help create ways to support, uplift, and propel their wives toward success however she defines it.
Become a collaborator with your partner to help ensure a future you both feel confident in sharing.
Will Curtis is a writer and editor for YourTango. He's been featured on the Good Men Project and taught English abroad for ten years.