The Best Age To Get Married If You Want To Avoid Divorce, According To Divorce Lawyer
The right age to embark on the journey of marriage.
simonapilollatnf | Canva As couples choose to embark on the journey of marriage, several factors can often contribute to the longevity of their devotion to spending the rest of their lives together.
According to a divorce lawyer named Tyler Summers, the best age to get married if you want to avoid divorce is at least 30.
Summers, a divorce and prenup attorney in Boston who often posts legal content on his TikTok platform, revealed there is a good age to get married and an age when you should avoid that type of long-term commitment altogether.
He explained that the worst age to get married is anywhere in your 20s. "In your 20s, you're still finding yourself. You have no idea what you want long-term. The person you marry at 21 is a very different person at age 28," he acknowledged.
Instead, Summers encouraged adults to wait until they are 30 and above to start considering taking the next step in their relationship. By that time, he noted, people usually have more of their lives together and can commit fully to the trials and tribulations that come with marriage.
"When they're 30, they're further along in their career, perhaps have some money. They're more mature, they are ready to have a long-term committed relationship," he continued. "Words of wisdom from a divorce lawyer, do not get married in your 20s. Period."
Studies have shown that couples who get married before the age of 28 are more likely to get a divorce.
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According to the National Center for Health Statistics, in the United States during 2021, a total of 689,308 divorces occurred across the 45 U.S. states. During that same year, 1,985,072 marriages occurred, making the U.S. marriage rate 6 per 1,000 people.
A 2016 study from the Institute for Family Studies found that couples who get married at age 20 are 50% more likely to divorce than couples who wait until they’re 25, with 28 being the "sweet spot" when it comes to marriage. For many couples in their 20s, this reasoning is often because they haven't had much time to think about the values and attributes that they are looking for in a long-term partner.
Ideally, marriage should be something that happens after you've experienced life on your own and discovered who you are for yourself before eventually deciding to share all of those moments with someone else.
"Up until around age 25, the human brain is still developing—specifically the part of the brain that is necessary for making informed decisions about the potential consequences of life choices like marriage (also known as the prefrontal cortex)," Shawntres Parks, a licensed marriage and family therapist, told Women's Health. "Folks who wait until after 25 will have higher success rates in avoiding divorce than couples under 25."
While waiting until 30 and beyond to get married can provide individuals with more self-awareness about what they want, people continue to evolve throughout their lives.
Personalities, interests, and values can still shift, and couples may find that what once brought them together no longer aligns with their current selves.
Life is incredibly unpredictable, and while both age and maturity can contribute to a long-lasting and healthy marriage, it does not mean that divorce is suddenly not going to happen just because you waited until you were 35 to walk down the aisle.
At the end of the day, the decision to marry should be made with careful consideration, and the key lies in not only choosing the right time but also a willingness to dedicate time to nurture a marriage through all of its stages.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.