8 Grown-Up Traits That Prove You've Finally Found Mature Love That Lasts
First love is great, but lasting love is even better.
simonapilollatnf | Canva It is not about my age. You may be feeling I am so old and infuriated I wrote this. Unfortunately, it is not about my age. It is about my perspective.
As you grow older, your perspective on love changes. Even though we are all selfish, it becomes about getting something more substantive and real.
When I was young, it was about going for the fast one and falling hard. But as you grow older, falling in love means more than the physical beauty we see.
Eight grown-up traits that prove you've finally found mature love (that can last!)
1. You took the time to get to know the person
We want to know the person and be willing to find substance in them.
- What are their goals?
- What is their background?
- Do we have similar interests?
- What do they like about me?
- Are they willing to pursue the relationship as much as I want?
As you grow older, you ask yourself more relevant questions before you accept a proposition or go for someone.
2. You find what truly matters
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It is clear what you want. You are more serious about life. It comes down to what truly matters. It may mean companionship, warmth, and affection, as revealed in a systematic review in Epidemiology and Health Journal, which affirmed what most people need.
Yes, it all comes down to having more depth and taking as much as you are giving. You don’t have the time to tolerate frivolities. You have a better eye for seeing red flags and not tolerating questionable behavior.
3. You know you don't simply fall in love
Falling in love is more superficial when you are younger. As you grow older, you want to discover and desire more about your partner. It is not about being restless, enthusiastic, or passionate. Perhaps you have seen so much and want to be understood, trusted, and more responsible.
It’s not just about going to the cinema or going to a fancy restaurant; you want something with more depth. You don’t mind visiting an online storage auction to buy your partner something nice.
4. You appreciate your their personality and don't expect big changes
You tend to appreciate the other person’s sincere gesture. You see them for who they are and what they have achieved. It is about how you can make them better, and it is more of a slow burn than a fast and furious tale.
5. You can communicate better
Since you know what you want, you are pretty precise about your feelings and expectations. You are clear and know what you can take and not take. The person can hear you speak to them, and you can build a strong foundation of communication.
Psychologist John M. Grohol explained that to "change marriage communication mistakes by changing habits. It takes some practice to change old marriage communication mistakes. It’s amazing how the energy between spouses can change so much with just a few changes. When you understand how it all fits together, you can make real progress in your relationship right away."
6. You have experience to learn from
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Experience is a candid teacher. Perhaps you have listened to your friends share their experiences, you have read such articles, you have read books, and you have had your own relationship experiences. You have a broader view when you are older because you have experience. You don’t simply assume or jump to conclusions, you are willing to find out and make hard decisions.
7. You accept the screw-ups
You are bound to make mistakes as you grow older, and the person you meet would have made mistakes, too. It is about learning through the process.
"Do you know the root cause of nearly every argument between a couple in a relationship?" asked dating coach Dave Elliott. "It's about some sort of discrepancy between their values, beliefs, habits, or expectations. To be successful long-term, it's important to be on similar pages regarding some of life's most important topics. It's also worth remembering that a relationship is between two individuals." Fallible Individuals will screw up and argue, mature relationships teach you to let it go.
8. You are not scared of being single
Falling in love may not be with another person. It may be with yourself! Why should you be scared of being in love with yourself when falling in love with another person fails?
The Good Men Project is a glimpse of what enlightened masculinity might look like in the 21st century.
