Parents Call Their Daughter’s Threat To Go No Contact After Her Sister Wrecked Her Car ‘Emotional Blackmail’
She thinks cutting off all contact is the only way to show them how much they hurt her.
Drama is bound to occur between siblings; however, it usually doesn’t go so far that someone threatens to go no contact with their family over it.
That’s exactly what one girl did, though, after her sister crashed her car and her parents refused to replace it.
The parents called their daughter's threat to go no contact after her sister wrecked her car 'emotional blackmail.'
In a since-deleted Reddit post, the dad asked for advice on handling a situation with his two daughters — Alana, who is 16, and Casey, who is a year older.
“My daughter Casey … worked and saved up money for around a year to be able to afford a better car than we could buy her with our family budget,” he began.
“My other daughter Alana ... recently got her driver’s license, and asked to drive Casey’s car," he continued. "Casey allowed it, but Alana ended up having a bad accident around six months ago which basically rendered the car unusable.”
Unfortunately, this has left the family in a bad financial situation.
“The insurance payout wasn’t nearly enough to cover the replacement, and with Alana’s medical bills from the accident (thankfully there was no permanent damage, just a broken arm and leg), there was no way we could afford to replace Casey’s car immediately,” he wrote.
Alana did all that she could to make things up to her sister, but Casey was having none of it. The girls’ dad convinced Casey to go to a family therapy session, which she did with the agreement that Alana would not be there.
“In the therapy session, she told us that she won’t be resuming a relationship with us until we replace her car, which realistically won’t be until next year,” he recounted. “When the therapist asked how she expected us to do that, Casey said we could just make Alana work to earn the money.”
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Their dad said that his daughter could not work to pay off the car because she had 'severe ADHD.'
“The issue is that Alana has severe ADHD, and already has trouble managing her school work," he said. "I’m worried that making her work to earn the money will harm her grades and have significant ramifications for her future."
“Casey said, ‘Well, she should have thought about that before destroying my car. I don’t care. I’m not gonna speak to any of you unless I have my car replaced,’” her dad recalled. “I responded that she was free to avoid speaking to me for as long as she wanted, but I’m not going to permanently harm her sister’s future to get her a car earlier.”
He then called her threat to go no contact “emotional blackmail,” which he doesn’t want to “set a precedent” for.
Those with ADHD can work, although it can be difficult.
According to the CDC, around seven million (11.4%) U.S. children between 3 and 17 have ADHD. Within that large number falls varying degrees of severity, however.
WebMD offers a closer look at ADHD and the ability to work.
“One national survey showed that only half of adults with ADHD were able to hold down a full-time job, compared to 72% of adults without the disorder,” they said. “But even when they were able to secure work, they tended to earn less than their peers. This results in up to $138 billion a year in lost income and productivity for the U.S. economy.”
Several people who commented on the Reddit post said they had ADHD and were able to work, and that doing so would actually help Alana learn important and necessary skills. Because ADHD is considered a disability under the Americans with Disabilities Act, she could also request accommodations.
Ultimately, it comes down to the fact that this situation is simply not fair to Casey, who worked hard and saved money for her car.
As one commenter said, “You’re only looking out for one child, and that’s Alana.”
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news and human interest topics.