Husband Is Concerned His Wife Averages 12 Hours Of Screen Time A Day While Taking Care Of Their 10-Month-Old
Is there a good reason for him to be worried?
Natalia Lebedinskaia / Shutterstock Everyone needs to be distracted sometimes. Unfortunately, in a world filled with so much technology and instant gratification, those distractions can become too abundant.
One husband was concerned that his wife might be too distracted when caring for one of their children.
One mom is spending twelve hours a day on her phone while she takes care of her baby.
A worried husband posted on Reddit asking for advice after he discovered just how much time his wife spends on her phone each day, all while taking care of one of their 10-month-old twins.
“We have twin babies who are 10 months old,” he explained. “I’m working during the week, and while I work, my grandma looks after one of the children to make things easier for my wife (she also loves doing this).”
“Even though my wife is getting so much help, she struggles to keep the house hygienic and doesn’t leave the house much,” he continued.
His concerns continued to mount as he observed more of his wife’s behavior.
“I noticed she is on her phone a lot, and she showed me her screen time is 12 hours a day,” he said. “I had massive concerns that the children’s needs aren’t being met as she kept putting them in car seats to calm them down, and they could spend a couple of hours or more a day in car seats at home.”
“It just feels like she’s neglecting them, and they aren’t getting the development they need even with extra help … I just don’t know what to do anymore, and I don’t think anyone can be a good mother while spending so much time on their phone,” he lamented.
Other Redditors had varying opinions about what could be going on.
The man’s fellow Reddit users couldn’t agree on how to best approach the situation.
Some believed the woman was suffering from postpartum depression. One person said, “Your wife is displaying all the classic signs of postpartum depression … I totally understand your frustration, but you need to meet her with empathy, not judgment.”
Others argued that her 12 hours of screen time may not actually be what it seems. “I often have YouTube videos playing through my earphones or out loud throughout the day that I listen to while cleaning, etc. ([Stay-at-home mom-ing] can be monotonous sometimes.) My screen time currently is 10 hours but that’s because much of the day it’s playing a video whether I’m listening or not, as I often get distracted and leave it running,” another person said.
Still, others took issue with the husband’s handling of the situation. “When my babies were little, I had trouble keeping the house hygienic and did not leave the house often. My problem? My ex-husband’s lack of empathy and emotional intimacy,” someone stated.
Perhaps this mom is just struggling to adjust to motherhood.
Becoming a mother is no easy feat, and becoming a mother to twins is something different entirely.
According to The Everymom, “One of the ‘taboo’ topics that comes up most often in twin-mom groups is the mourning of what could have been — particularly when your first pregnancy is twins. For years, you may have envisioned a life with one child. Being able to devote yourself wholly to bonding, the ability to easily pack up and travel or visit family and friends.”
Adjusting to life as a mom is a big leap. Often, when you picture yourself doing that, you only see one baby. When there’s two involved, that’s double the stress all at once.
The best thing to do would be to set judgment and frustrations aside and support this mom as she figures out what her new life looks like now.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.