Wives Go Wild For Husbands Who Do These 5 Little Things
There's more to love than just someone telling your significant other you love them.
Alones / Shutterstock Are you madly in love and want nothing more than to tell your wife or girlfriend exactly how much? You already know how important it is to say, "I love you," but in addition to those three words, showing her how you feel regularly — and making the effort to find out the best ways to do it — speaks volumes, too. There are many to show your girlfriend or wife just how much you love her, and by doing them, you'll learn how to be a better husband or boyfriend to her in the process. Here are 5 creative ways the best husbands and boyfriends say, "I love you," without actually saying a word.
Wives go wild for husbands who do these 5 little things:
1. Listen and don’t try to fix her
One of the men's best personality traits is that they are fixers. Give them a problem, and what they want to do more than anything is fix it. Unfortunately, women don’t want to be fixed. They want to be listened to. They want to be acknowledged. They want to know that their man hears them sees them and understands what they’re going through.
So, the next time your woman is sitting on the couch feeling sad, ask her what is wrong and then listen to what she tells you. Tell her that you hear what she is saying and that you are very sorry. And then ask her what she needs from you. Don’t give her advice. Just ask her what she needs. This might seem like a very simple thing, but it is what women want more than anything — to be heard, but not fixed.
2. Anticipate her needs
Those who are unhappy in love often expect men to anticipate their needs, and by doing so, they open themselves up to disappointment. What women want, more than anything is for their men to anticipate their needs, but many men just don’t know how to do it. Women's friends, sisters, and mothers are the ones who can anticipate their needs without even batting an eye, so they can rely on them to do so.
That being said, men can anticipate the needs of their partner, if they want to. I haven’t always believed this, but now I am in a relationship with a man who does pay attention and follows through, so my attitude has changed. What does it mean to anticipate the needs of your woman? Quite simply, it's no more than paying attention and taking action.
Every night, I sleep with extra blankets on my side of the bed. More often than not, after I brush my teeth, I go to my bedroom and discover that my boyfriend already took the blankets out of the closet and put them on my side of the bed. Every time he does this, I feel loved. I know it’s a little thing, but it shows that he’s paying attention. Having men anticipate the little things is very important for women. If you can anticipate what she might need — and follow through with action — you will show your woman you love her.
3. Notice here
When was the last time you told your woman how beautiful she looked? When was the last time you told your woman what a great mom she is or how much you love her? Do you assume you don’t need to say those things because she knows? If that is the case, you’re very wrong. Women need to be noticed. They need to know you see them, that you see the way they look, the way they act, and the way you feel about them.
Unfortunately, the longer we are in a relationship, the less we get acknowledged for how amazing we are. You're probably still thinking, "I love my girlfriend or wife and she’s amazing", but you might forget to tell her. So, take every opportunity that you can to notice your woman. Tell her the amazing things that you see her do and that you love her very much. If you want to show your woman you love her, make her feel seen.
4. Hold her hand
Women love holding hands. There is nothing better than walking down the street holding your man’s hand as you go. That long-ago moment, when a boy reached for her hand in the movie theater, was the first moment that your woman knew how it felt to be cared for. Holding hands seems like very little thing but for women, it can be more intimate than being physical. The physical contact — without expectation of anything more — makes us feel special and loved and way more likely to want to give more. The next time you’re walking with your woman, reach over and take her hand. If you do this, you can show your woman you love her in a very simple way.
Photo: Taryn Elliott/Pexels
5. Learn her "love language"
According to Dr. Gary Chapman in his book, The 5 Love Languages, there are five love languages — five ways that people express and receive love.
The 5 love languages are:
- Quality time
- Physical touch
- Words of affirmation
- Acts of service
- Giving of gifts
For each person, one of those gestures is the thing that makes them feel the most loved. When a partner tries to show them love using a different love language, they don’t feel quite as loved. My love language is quality time. I feel loved when someone is truly present with me, listening to me, focusing on me. My ex-husband’s love language was physical touch; he felt love when I was holding his hand, hugging him, or was intimate with him.
Unfortunately, the love language we spoke best with each other was acts of service. We did things for each other, like changing the oil in the car or going to the grocery store. Stuff got done, but neither of us felt truly loved. Relationships are long and hard, and understanding what you can do to keep the love strong is very important.
So, if you want to be a better husband or a better boyfriend, figure out your woman's love language. Then, make an effort to listen to her without trying to fix her or anticipate her needs. See her and hold her hand. In addition to saying, "I love you," doing these simple things will make her feel loved — which will make your relationship stronger and make you both happy.
Mitzi Bockmann is an NYC-based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate who works exclusively with women to help them be all they want to be. Mitzi's bylines have appeared in The Good Men Project, MSN, PopSugar, Prevention, Huffington Post, and Psych Central, among many others.