I Had No Idea How To Squirt (Until It Just Happened!)
It was like a geyser ... Whoa!
tugol / Shutterstock I had no idea until very recently that I am a squirter.
It wasn’t something that had ever come up in partnered sexual experiences or solo play.
When I heard people share thoughts about how to squirt, I figured it was something that you either could or couldn’t do, like rolling your tongue (can’t) or liking cilantro (also can’t, yuck! Why would you sprinkle soap on your food?!).
If it was something I was capable of, you’d have thought it would have come up at some point in the previous twenty-six years of my sex life.
The change began (along with so many awesome things in my sex life) with Dan Savage.
I was getting my perv on — I mean, my education, of course — listening online to my now-amazing-friend Cooper S. Beckett chatting with Dan about getting women to orgasm. I found myself fascinated by Cooper's epic tales about orgasms brought on through play with the njoy Eleven dildo.
"I must have it!" I thought until I discovered the price tag.
"I must have a less expensive model!," I thought, and as I ordered a less-expensive, but still g-spot specific dildo.
I really thought I was just ordering an awesome new toy. When I held the cool metal curve of my new friend in my hands about a week later, I had no idea what I was in for (or I’d have put down some towels).
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Within about five minutes of using the toy, I felt an irresistible need to bear down against it and then felt a crazy sensation as fluid started gushing out of me. It wasn’t anything like a clitoral orgasm, but it felt really nice and really wet.
“Holy *&^%! I just squirted!” was the text that went out to my husband.
Things progressed from me ejaculating only with the Pure Wand to it happening with any toys a g-spot curve. Then an intrigued play partner got inquisitive with his long fingers and made me squirt repeatedly one evening.
The more it happened, the more likely it seemed to happen.
Once I figured out what it felt and sounded like just before, I started getting a little too results-focused, which would often kill any potential release. Relaxing, and enjoying the build of sensations were much more effective in getting me there.
I’ve also had partners who are entirely too fascinated with my ability and hammer away relentlessly at my poor g-spot until I’m left begging for mercy (and feeling pretty sore the next day).
Recently, there seems to be a cascade effect that happens, much like multiple orgasms.
If a toy or a partner has set me off a few times, I start having deep waves of spasm and continue to fountain — even with clitoral stimulus only, and sometimes without any stimulus at all!
It’s starting to feel more profoundly pleasurable as well, regularly causing me to burst into bouts of hysterical laughter or tears related to the intense release.
I’d thought that the curved shape of a dildo or fingers was an essential part of stimulating the Skene’s glands necessary to produce the fluid until this week when I was with a delightful young partner who has almost no refractory period. I went off like a geyser all over him.
It was the first time I’ve squirted in response to good old-fashioned PIV.
I’m going to have to make sure I warn future partners about this possibility.
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Kat (she/they) is a sex-positive, geeky, Canadian, and pansexual. She's also a podcaster - On The Wet Coast Podast - and audiobook narrator for Cooper S Beckett's novels A Life Less Monogamous and Approaching the Swingularity. onthewetcoast.com @WetcoastKat on Twitter. Their first book - Yelling In Pasties: The Wet Coast Confessions of an Anxious Slut - is available on Amazon.com, Amazon.ca, Inkterra, and Kobo.