Insurance Worker Says The Staff Was Forced To Sign A Pledge Recognizing Health Insurance Executives As 'An Indispensable Pillar Of The Healthcare System'
The murder of United Healthcare CEO Brian Thompson seems to have made a lot of powerful people very nervous.
The shocking murder of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson has had many surprising twists and turns. But few are quite as bracing as the wake-up call the incident delivered to the ruling class of business leaders, CEOs, and our most obsequious politicians.
For what feels like the first time in most of our lifetimes, the people in charge seem legitimately rattled by the depths of anger felt by the rest of us, leaving some business leaders scrambling in ways that are frankly kind of hilarious.
An insurance office was forced by its CEO to sign a pledge of support to health insurance executives.
It's too early to tell what long-range impact the attack on Thompson will have, but there is no denying that it has elites quaking in their boots. A perusal of social media shows people sharply divided into two camps: those moralizing about how "violence is not the answer" and those simply tapped out of empathy for anyone trying to villainize the rest of us.
There's certainly room to argue that point about violence — Thompson was a human being with a family, regardless of his job. But the reality of who comprises these two camps is impossible to ignore: news media, politics, and big business in the former; and in the latter, basically everybody else — from both sides of the political spectrum, for what feels like the first time in more than a decade.
And it's equally impossible not to notice the impact it's having, beginning with how the uproar compelled health insurer Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield to immediately renege on its recently announced plan to limit how much anesthesia it will pay for during surgeries, just 24 hours after Thompson's death.
Then there's a story a Redditor shared about what's going on at their friend's workplace. Their friend is an actuary, an insurance professional who assesses risk, in a consultancy with ties to the health insurance industry.
And it seems they and their colleagues received a hilariously revealing email from their CEO on the afternoon of December 5, the day after Thompson was slain. It gives a glimpse into just how rattled powerful people are by what the past 48 hours have revealed.
The CEO required staff to sign a 'safety and solidarity' pledge about the 'well-being of our executive team.'
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA sorry, I was momentarily overwhelmed by how absolutely pathetic this is. If you've ever dreamt of seeing your boss grovel for your approval and respect, well, this post's for you.
"Everyone this afternoon got an email from the CEO requiring them to pledge that they thought health insurance and executives were good lmaoooo," the Redditor wrote of the email. They then included screenshots showing just how ludicrous this move is.
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"In light of recent events in our industry, several employees have reached out to express concerns about safety, particularly regarding the well-being of our executive team," the CEO wrote. How much you want to bet that absolutely did not happen, at all, even once?
"We take these concerns very seriously and are committed to fostering an environment where everyone feels secure and supported," the CEO went on to say before explaining that all staff will be required to take a pledge in order to "[maintain] a safe and respectful workplace." The pledge itself is even more hilarious.
The pledge requires employees to affirm that health insurance executives are an 'indispensable pillar of the healthcare system.'
"We are requiring each of you to take the following pledge," the CEO went on to say in the email. What then followed is one of the most ridiculous documents ever written in the English language.
The pledge started off reasonably enough: It required employees to agree to report "safety concerns or threats" and to take "proactive measures to uphold a secure and inclusive working environment for all employees, including senior leadership." Fair enough.
But then it took a sharp turn.
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Workers were also forced to "commit" to "recognizing the health insurance industry and its vendors as an indispensable pillar of the American healthcare system" and "acknowledging the vital role of executives as the organization's key drivers of success and as exemplars of leadership and professionalism."
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL brother, if you are THIS unnerved, you can just look in the mirror every morning and say a few affirmations to your own reflection about all the good you're doing helping insurers deny people basic medical care. You don't need to be doing all this!
As you might have guessed, this "pledge" went over like a lead balloon on Reddit. "This is deranged," one commenter wrote, while another marveled at the "odd combination of trying to exert total control while running scared."
Another was stunned at the juxtaposition between the pledge's "normal" items about safety, privacy, and denouncing violence and its required oath that "'I am a cog in a capitalist machine, I swear my undying loyalty to my capitalist overlords, all hail, all hail.'"
Frankly, there are cults with more reasonable lists of demands, and while this is certainly reflective of the bizarre and fascistic times in which we live — and will surely have dire legal ramifications for anyone who actually agrees to sign it — what is far more important, and should be a lesson to us all, is how manifest it is that this company's CEO is quaking in his likely very expensive boots.
Good — and may that fear stay contagious.
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.