Woman Says 20-Year-Old Traditional Wives Become Single Moms At 40
It's important to have a backup plan.
ilonakozhevnikova / Canva Pro Choosing to become a "tradwife," or traditional wife, in your early 20s is a huge life decision. While most young adults are enjoying the freedom of independence for the first time, these wives have traded burgeoning careers and higher education for diapers and domestic responsibility.
The problem with this narrative is not that tradwives want to be homemakers, it's that these young moms end up sacrificing their own individual paths while their husbands grow in their careers. These moms may even find themselves single by the time they reach 40, having dedicated their lives to a man who may not have been the right match.
One woman shared her controversial opinion about young, traditional wives inevitably becoming single by their 40s.
Anya Jovita posted a video on TikTok to discuss her opposition to young women making drastic decisions that will likely inhibit them from following their own individual paths.
Her argument centered around the idea that every woman is entitled to her own personal life choices, but women should be cognizant of the challenges they will face when they set their lives aside to be tradwives to a man they met in their 20s.
“The entire stability of your life cannot rely on a man that you marry in your 20s wanting you for the next 60 years,” Jovita emphasized.
Young love can be blinding, but how can a woman be so sure the man she is dedicating her life to will always be there no matter what? How can she be sure that he, or she, won’t eventually have a change of heart?
The decision to marry is not one to be taken lightly, and there are countless factors to consider and discuss before individuals should officially seal the deal. When young men and women choose to marry at the height of their emotions, they are neglecting the challenges and difficulties that are bound to happen later on.
“What happens when you’re ready to walk away, but you have no job experience, no bank account, nothing, because your entire future relied on this guy, this one human being, wanting you forever?” Jovita exclaimed.
When a woman chooses to depend on a man for support and security, she is giving up her autonomy.
Young parenthood can be challenging, but it offers its own rewards that can be just as gratifying as any other experience. However, it’s important to note that young parenthood does not necessarily equate to the path of a traditional stay-at-home mom. There are many different options parents can explore.
When a young woman makes the decision to marry and rely solely on her husband, she loses the opportunity to have her own sense of freedom and independence. “Our grandmothers had to fight the U.S. government to get bank accounts, and barely even 50 years later, y’all are voluntarily giving them up,” Jovita expressed.
There's no guarantee that the man you fall for in your 20s will be the husband of your dreams for the rest of your lives together, no matter what he leads you to believe.
In fact, research suggests that 30% of white couples who plan "shotgun weddings" end up divorced later on in life. This is due to the impulsive decision to marry for the sake of their child, rather than for genuine, unconditional love for each other.
That being said, it seems irrational to base a lifelong decision on a fleeting moment of love, especially when that decision involves the sacrifice of your career.
With an emphasis on women's empowerment in today’s world, the prevalence of tradwives begs the question: Why are women still sacrificing their autonomy for men?
Surely, there are rare occasions of finding genuine love early in life, and some women are lucky enough to find a man whom they can trust will take care of them. Yet, just because this stability is available to you does not mean you should willingly abandon your own purpose.
Regardless of a woman’s thought process behind the risky decisions she makes, Judge Judy’s advice from "The Ellen Show" continues to ring true today when it comes to ensuring individual freedom and independence in relationships.
“Once a woman gives up financial independence to a mate, it’s over. Because there's not an equality anymore,” Judge Judy explained. “You don't necessarily have to use your craft, use your career, but you have to be prepared, because if you're not prepared, you’re stuck, and more women have to accept lifestyles that are unpleasant because they are financially stuck.”
Francesca Duarte is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. She covers lifestyle, human-interest, adventure, and spirituality topics.