What True Healing Actually Looks Like
Before starting any kind of healing journey it's important to know what progress will look like when you get there.
Oleg Magni / Pexels via Canva Starting your healing journey is no walk in the park — seriously. So how can we be sure we're making real progress? What signs should we watch out for to gauge how far we are in our healing journey?
Dr. Nicole LePera is a holistic psychologist who specializes in guiding individuals toward healing and re-connection. In an Instagram post, LePera breaks down the eight signs genuine healing is underway.
8 Signs Of True Healing
1. Reminding your younger self how far you've come
LePera discusses that true healing is keeping a photo of yourself when you were a kid. Looking at it reminds you how far you've come. After all, it's amazing just how much work you put in to get where you are today.
"Remember, you're in control of who you are and the opportunities that come into your life," says LePera.
2. Releasing your savior complex
"You know that you're healing when you stop healing others," says LePera. By putting trust in others, you recognize that they are responsible for their healing. And you're responsible for your own.
Focus on what's best for you and throw away the external distractions. Understand that your healing journey should always be your number one priority.
As we begin to put ourselves first beautiful things can come to fruition. Self-care begins to come naturally and our emotional and physical well-being begins to increase.
3. Allowing yourself to rest
When you heal, you naturally begin to rest more. Resting from the busyness of the world around you allows you to clear your mind.
Through resting, we decrease our anxiety and boost our overall well-being, according to the McKinley Health Center. Resting can also help lower our blood pressure, heart rate, and decrease muscle tension.
But don't confuse resting with sleeping. As LePera puts it, “It’s the sun on your skin and the breeze through your hair as you gift your nervous system relief from stimulation.”
4. Realizing no one really knows what they're doing
True healing is realizing that we don't know what we're doing, but we're not alone. After all, there are no one-size-fits-all healing guidelines.
We are journeying through this as we take one step at a time. However, our cluelessness is what gives us strength and makes this journey beautiful.
As LePera writes, “We find strength in being the humble student.”
5. Following your curiosities and interests
When we begin to heal we go through a journey of self-discovery. Tuning out other voices, we begin to listen to our own. However, it's important to recognize that self-care varies from person to person. For some, getting in 30 minutes of exercise daily is their version of self-care. For others, it's about setting goals and embracing gratitude.
Regardless, “Self-care means taking the time to do things that help you live well and improve both your physical health and mental health,” writes the National Institute of Mental Health.
So, find what works for you and make it a part of your routine.
6. Having patience for all parts of you
Part of our journey towards healing involves being patient and compassionate with ourselves, even during our toughest moments. Whether it's how we treat ourselves, the words we use, or the way we perceive ourselves, showing kindness and respect for ourselves is a key indicator we are healing.
People who've experienced dysfunction during childhood may find this difficult.
According to licensed therapist Annie Wright, our neuroplasticity affects how we think. Neuroplasticity is created from our previous life experiences. Through this, we create neural pathways in our brains which influence our thoughts and behaviors.
Growing up in dysfunction causes our neuroplasticity to develop patterns of negative self-talk. However, we can create better experiences that slowly weed out our negative self-talk. It just requires patience and understanding on your part.
7. Pushing yourself out of your comfort zone
We know that we're healing when we push ourselves out of our comfort zone. It can feel intimidating, as we're afraid of failure or making mistakes.
However, as LePera points out, "When you have a beginner’s mindset, you’re never good at something until you practice.”
Remember, we're never good at most things until we practice and learn from our mistakes.
But arguably this is the best part about stepping outside of our comfort zone. Cheering yourself on as you make mistakes can feel empowering and exhilarating. In addition, being able to turn failure into a positive learning experience allows us to grow and learn throughout our healing journey.
8. Finally realizing who you are
The most impactful aspect of healing is getting to know who you are. But what does this mean? Have you ever questioned if you knew who you were? Beyond your likes and dislikes, you may begin to realize you haven't got a clue.
We are so wrapped in the identity of our conditioned responses that we can't see our true essence. Our intense emotions overshadow our potential selves.
As you slowly progress in your healing journey, you'll gradually reconnect with your inner self, reclaiming your identity. And what a truly beautiful journey that'll be.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, and family topics.