10 Unusual Behaviors That Make People Respect You More
They may be unconventional, but these tactics are key to earning respect.
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock Years of sharing this planet with everyone else can teach important lessons about how you carry yourself, and the way others perceive you. That's especially true when it comes to respect, and whether or not your fellow humans view you as respectable.
Now, not all human behavior makes a whole lot of sense, but there are certain habits that will draw people into you, and begin seeing you in a new, positive light.
Here are 10 unusual behaviors that make people respect you more
1. Sharing something you dislike about yourself
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We're all terrified of being banished from the crowd and looked at funny, so most of us put energy into appearing wonderful, flawless, and virtuous. But only wanting to talk about our positive traits isn't a way to earn respect.
Instead, it's better to go against the grain and reveal something you dislike about yourself. It immediately puts you in the minority and shows something cool: you're human. And that's incredibly relatable.
2. Smiling less
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There's a mystery to those who don't always smile when you expect them to. Intelligent people can sense insincere grins and aren't too fond of fakeness.
While there are benefits to smiling, if you smile at everything, it takes the power out of any single smile. But if you're more selective about when you smile, it can show discernment, a thoughtful mind, and authenticity.
3. Repeating their words
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Most people are determined to empty out everything they want others to know about their lives and problems. Few take a moment to turn it around and help people feel heard.
A powerful way to do this is to repeat back some of what people say. In fact, repeating someone's words back to them is known to be a sign of great active listening skills. It also reinforces a strong bond between you and the other person.
4. Making someone uncomfortable
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Making someone uncomfortable doesn't mean being rude or contrary just to get a rise out of them. Rather, it means broaching topics of conversation few dare traverse.
If you can move to your edges and get closer to the truth, instead of being evasive around sensitive issues all the time, people will be attracted to your courage. And by seeing you as courageous, you will be more respected.
5. Staying focused
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It's incredibly refreshing to see someone actively attentive when another person is speaking to them. It's becoming rare to find someone who isn't distracted and fidgety when in conversation!
In order to make people respect you more, be different. Turn off your phone and give your full, present attention. Do it to put others at ease, if not to just be polite.
6. Using physical touch
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Not all communication needs to be verbal. Certainly, understanding body language is crucial for strengthening bonds and appearing more respectable to others.
Appropriate and intermittent physical touch brings a new dynamic that can take your interaction from pleasant to unforgettable.
7. Rarely talking about yourself
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To come across as refreshing, stop telling people about your woes and achievements, and ask them a question instead. Refrain from talking about yourself as much as possible, and steer the conversation elsewhere.
Give others sincere compliments occasionally. Because by showing interest in other people, they will be more interested in you.
8. Being unavailable
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You don't always need to be there or respond to a text instantly. Instead, you can take a beat, finish doing what you're doing, and then come back to the conversation later.
When you demonstrate constant availability, you indicate lower status and value. That's because the more scarce anything is, the higher its perceived value. This applies to rare diamonds, just as it does to you.
9. Coming off a little unfriendly
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In a world where almost everyone is trying to be extra nice, you can, instead, bring a whole new dynamic when you can (occasionally) let go of this need. You'll be seen as more genuine and will earn the respect of everyone around you.
By being unfriendly, it doesn't equate to being mean or rude. Rather, it means being a little cocky and showing your pride. Tease people after you've gotten to know them a little, and be occasionally brutally honest if it serves.
10. Being weird
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If there was one way to have people respect you, it's to follow your weirdness.
This doesn't mean being a walking gimmick try-hard; instead, it means leaning into those aspects of yourself that come naturally, but can be repressed to appease your fear of not fitting in. Your quirky, fun-loving behavior, for example.
Hide less and show more. You may polarize or lose some people, but you'll have the real ones who admire you for life.
Alex Mathers is a coach, writer, and illustrator whose work focuses on mental health, confidence, growing a business, and impactful writing. He has worked with the BBC, Wired Magazine, Medium, and Google, among others.