10 Unsexy Ways To Improve Your Life In 60 Seconds A Day
Everyone has a minute to spare.
Zamrznuti tonovi / Shutterstock I'm going to write a post in the same vein as Laura Vanderkam’s book 168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think because it is awesome.
This time I, your friendly yet challenging therapist who does not accept any of your BS excuses, say to you: How is it possible that you do not have 60 seconds to improve your life?
Even if you are Barack Obama, or, similarly, a mom with three kids under 4 1/2, you have this. Even, as was pointed out in the book (but I already knew this because crazy people all think alike) when you are microwaving something!
Okay, let’s move to some concrete suggestions here for the use of your "time confetti" (See Brigid Schulte’s book Overwhelmed, for a description of these minutes here and there that many people feel they cannot use productively).
Here are 10 unsexy ways to improve your life in 60 seconds a day:
1. Text message your husband something flirty
Yes, he will at first think it is a wrong number, but use a code phrase, like "it’s [insert your name here], for real." This can do wonders to put some excitement into your husband’s day, and even yours when you see the reaction. If you squint your eyes and think really hard, you can remember when you used to do stuff like this with pretty good results when you were dating, right?
2. Write down a funny or cute thing each of your kids did that day in a journal or (my choice) Excel spreadsheet
This is going to be a wonderful resource when they are older, and you can scroll through it whenever you need a pick-me-up. From mine: Clara at age 15 months called popsicles "opsicles" and asked for one for dessert. Come on, that’s pretty cute.
3. Call your friends
Yes, that’s right, you know they won’t pick up since nobody does anymore, but you can leave them a funny voicemail.
My favorites involve putting your kids on the phone. What, you don’t remember what "voicemail" means?
They are the things that are like your answering machine of yesteryear, that you never check anymore. When you get a little cassette tape icon on your phone you should check voicemail. Cassette, you know….. oh forget it. Anyway, make sure to also text your friend to listen to the voicemail or this one is pointless.
4. Do a plank
We have done these at the end of every Stroller Strides class and at first, I couldn’t do it for even 20 seconds. Now I hold it for 60 seconds like a badass planking mofo. And I feel good about it.
5. Upload some pictures from your phone and order physical prints
The whole thing takes about 60 seconds if you just pick the first cute pictures you see. Then when the preschool teacher asks for a family photo to hang on the classroom wall, you won’t feel like a crappy mom for not having any.
6. Paint your preschooler’s nails
If you only allow yourself 1 minute, you won’t feel frustrated when they immediately mess up the rainbow of colors you so artistically created for them upon their request.
7. At the dinner table, everyone says one thing they were grateful for that day
Kids have a bit of difficulty expressing gratitude, but expressing and feeling gratitude is known to increase happiness and decrease depression.
If the kids hear that you’re grateful for them and for things they did (e.g. be a helpful big sister), this really puts a smile on their faces. Ditto your husband. And the children themselves learn to see their day through a more positive lens, looking for what went well rather than what didn’t.
8. Fantasize on purpose
Studies show links between women’s sexual fantasizing and their enjoyment of sex. If you think for a minute now about something exciting to you (if it’s not your husband, that’s perfectly normal for most women), will you be likelier to want to have sex or just to be more open to physical connection later that day? Yes, and yes, and now your husband knows who to thank for this suggestion.
9. Think of a direct and specific compliment for someone you know
Not just the constant "good job" litany for your kids (which research shows isn’t good anyhow), but something more meaningful, a la "You really do the best job making my cappuccino every day" to your favorite barista or "You always look handsome in that blue shirt" to your husband. It will make you feel good as well as make the recipient feel good, and it only took a minute of your life.
10. Put on a song and sing and dance to it with the kids
This may take two minutes, not one, but it is a welcome break from the drudgery of feed, potty, wipe, clean, repeat that can so often characterize your entire day with toddlers. Natalia’s favorite is Katy Perry’s Roar.
Now go forth and make use of your 60-second increments, my faithful readership. Until next time, I remain, The Blogapist Who Loves Time Management.
Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten, aka Dr. Psych Mom, is a clinical psychologist in private practice and the founder of DrPsychMom. She works with adults and couples in her group practice Best Life Behavioral Health.