Self-Proclaimed 'Ugly' Woman Claims Not Fitting Into Beauty Standards Isn't A Big Deal — 'It's Easier To Make Friends'
“I don't believe a person needs to have an active romantic or sexual life to be happy and have a fulfilling life.”
Jasen Wright / Shutterstock It’s not often that women describe themselves as “ugly,” as the term is deemed insulting and offensive.
But one self-proclaimed “ugly” woman shared her unpopular take on the term, claiming she personally doesn’t care to fit into beauty standards, and there are worse insults to be called.
The woman took to Reddit to share why she believes being ugly shouldn’t be a big deal.
In the r/unpopularopinion forum, the woman began her post by stating, “I am an ugly woman.”
“I am very out of the beauty standard for my country, and in friend groups, it has always been the consensus that I am the least attractive one,” she wrote in her post. “I am out of shape, don't look after myself too much beyond the basics, and my facial features are kind of weird.”
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She explained how when she was a teenager, she experienced the typical insecurities surrounding her appearance, but as she’s gotten older, she realizes there is more to life than fitting into beauty standards.
“Being ugly doesn't mean that you are unpleasant to be around or that you are an idiot or anything like that; it just means that most people wouldn't want to be with you romantically or sexually,” the woman said. “I don't believe a person needs to have an active romantic or sexual life to be happy and have a fulfilling life.”
And she makes a valid point — there is far more to life than being perceived as attractive by others. A happy and fulfilling life isn’t defined by how attractive you are, despite pretty privilege being a very real and unfair experience.
A happy and fulfilling life is defined by the passion, experiences, and connections you find and create throughout your life.
Being attractive goes deeper than physical appearance.
Physical attractiveness is only one element of beauty, but true beauty lies within an individual’s personality, intelligence, and morality.
Additionally, attractiveness is widely subjective, and many people tend to focus more on an individual’s confidence and personality to determine how attractive they are. And science has proved it. A study from 2021 concluded, "The true definition of the concept of beauty is still ambiguous, and there is not a unanimous explanation for it. It seems that the definition of beauty differs in every individual's mind and over the history of humankind."
Basically, beauty is constantly changing, constantly evolving, and truly subjective.
Rather than longing to fit into societal beauty standards, the woman has decided to accept and embrace who she is, and she’s had some interesting revelations about the benefits of not being conventionally attractive.
She claimed that being less attractive makes it easier for her to develop genuine friendships, as people are less focused on her looks and more focused on the depth of their connection.
“I think it makes it easier to make friends too. I'm not a threat to my female friends, and I am not an object of desire for my male friends,” she added. “Sure, some people are [rude], but these aren't people worthy of attention anyway.”
She ended her post by asserting that using “ugly” as an insult is ignorant.
“Insults to personality and mental capability are much worse,” she affirmed.
Reddit users argued that the woman’s experience doesn’t speak to how many other ‘ugly’ people are treated.
She and many others who don’t fit into typical beauty standards can likely relate to not caring about what others think about their appearance, swapping insecurity for unapologetic confidence.
Others, however, have had less pleasant experiences because of their appearance, especially if they represent a minority group and already face daily prejudice and discrimination.
“Ugly has layers to it, too. I hate to be the person that goes there, but being a below-average white woman is different from being a below-average POC woman,” someone commented on the post. “Privilege based on physical appearance isn’t always about beauty.”
“No matter how progressive a place is, people will always hold these inherent and subconscious biases,” someone else commented. “Life is factually harder for ugly people.”
Unfortunately, people can be judgmental and cruel simply because of an individual's unconventional or unique physical appearance, pointing to a toxic pattern in human behavior.
This sad reality only reveals how close-minded and shallow some people are to mistreat others solely because of their appearance, and this form of behavior is what's more ugly than anything else.
True beauty isn’t defined by an individual’s appearance. In fact, appearance is the least significant element of true beauty. Rather, individuals who possess admirable qualities, like kindness, goodwill, and integrity, define what true beauty is.
Francesca Duarte is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. She covers lifestyle, human-interest, adventure, and spirituality topics.