9 Traits Of People Who Get Offended Way Too Easy, According To Psychology
Being offended is just another way to maintain control.
MAYA LAB | Shutterstock There are certain traits of people who get offended way too easy. Perhaps it's a result of someone's actions, but usually, it's because they don't like the words someone is speaking.
People like this become especially offended if they are criticized. They take criticism to heart and allow their emotions to get the better of them, affecting the people around them as well.
According to research from the journal Emotion, emotional regulation is great for building financial success and well-being. Unfortunately, easily offended people miss out on this when they become frazzled instead of taking a deep breath and keeping an open mind.
Here are 9 traits of people who get offended way too easy, according to psychology
1. They're overly self-conscious
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Those who cannot come to grips with their own insecurities get offended way too easily. They believe that if they dodge people's criticism, it will make their shortcomings easier to bear. But it's a losing game, as defensiveness doesn't prevent their unwanted thoughts. Feeling trapped, they become increasingly sensitive and self-conscious.
Research has shown the effects insecurity has on others. A study from the Journal of Affective Disorders found that high insecurity leads to negative effects on subjective well-being. This correlation was controlled by hope and self-control. People who had low hope in their youth had a stronger prediction for high insecurity and low self-control.
For individuals who are easily offended, they find it difficult to control those negative thoughts. But still, their perception of themselves and the way others see them can feel overwhelming.
2. They believe the world revolves around them
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Another of the traits of people who get offended way too easily is the tendency to believe the world revolves around them. Because they are used to getting what they want, they just can't take no for an answer.
When faced with rejection, they become agitated, as nobody ever refuses them and now they aren't sure how to proceed. They put up a good fight simply because they want what they can't have. These individuals don't quite understand that putting hard work into something reaps better rewards.
3. They hold grudges
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People who get offended way too easily hold grudges for every reason under the sun. Whether someone borrowed a pencil in grade school and never gave it back, or a co-worker made a snide comment in the breakroom, they won't let go of their distrust, disdain, or intolerance. It's an intense fixation that makes easily offended people reminisce on the past. They don't know how to move forward and make themselves miserable as a result.
According to psychotherapist Sean Grover LCSW, people who hold grudges don't know how to process their emotions, and act childishly. When they do this, they throw away their ability to grow and instead embrace victimhood.
A study from the Journal of Health Psychology found that stress caused by grudges leads to an increase in blood pressure, heart problems, and mental health problems like anxiety and depression. Along with holding a grudge impacting a person's mental well-being, it can also affect their physical health for the worse.
4. They lack self-awareness
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People who get easily offended have zero self-awareness. This means they lack maturity, especially when it comes to understanding and recognizing their behaviors. When they're in a conversation, they don't pay attention, nor do they let others speak. They criticize others, are stuck in the past, and will never admit to a mistake.
It's all too easy for them to get offended when confronted with their own ignorance. They become defensive, arguing that they were listening and being considerate, despite proof of the opposite. In reality, their lack of self-awareness is obvious, and it leaves those around them feeling unheard and annoyed.
5. They think in black and white
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One of the biggest traits of people who get offended way too easily is their dichotomous thinking. They don't see the world in shades of gray; rather, they see situations as right or wrong, good or bad, and successful or a failure. There's no in-between.
When they receive pushback to their close-minded thinking, they become offended and go off about how they are right. It all stems from their inability to embrace other viewpoints and see things from another perspective.
According to research published in Personality and Social Psychology, open-minded people tend to increase their learning by examining their beliefs, decisions, and mistakes. Openness also benefits teamwork, as it encourages others to engage in frank discussion. Unfortunately, this way of thinking just doesn't click with people who become easily offended.
6. They play the victim
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People tend to play the victim as a way to protect their self-esteem or public image. They find a way to blame others, even if it's their own fault or doing, and they play up their emotions to garner sympathy, usually as a way to avoid taking responsibility.
Psychotherapist Erin Leonard, Ph.D. says that playing the victim isn't just an ego boost, but allows someone to manipulate others a lot more easily. Because the sympathetic person feels bad, they'll go out of their way to see that person smile, often causing them to overexert themselves.
For the person who is easily offended, when someone doesn't buy into their performance, they quickly turn explosive. They will do everything in their power to guilt trip that person into believing they're the victim, including gaslighting them.
7. They fear rejection
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A trait of people who get offended way too easily is their fear of rejection. They don't know how to deal with uncomfortable emotions that come with this fear, and due to their emotional immaturity, they become paralyzed, often storming off in anger.
Sitting with those feelings of rejection can have consequences. A 2022 study found that several emotions arise when people experience real, anticipated, remembered, or imagined rejection. Feeling rejected leads to hurt feelings, loneliness, shame, social anxiety, and embarrassment. However, these feelings occur because they perceive that their relational value to other people is low or in jeopardy.
For people who are easily offended, they simply won't take the correct steps to overcome this fear, leading to a continuation of this bad behavior.
8. They need constant validation
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Needing constant validation is a trait of people who are easily offended. They frequently seek validation not only from their loved ones, but from strangers as well. It speaks to their lack of self-esteem.
These individuals don't believe in themselves and tend to lack confidence. They spend a lot of time thinking about their flaws and imperfections, comparing themselves to others, when they should really be doing the internal work to move past this need for validation.
When someone doesn't offer them the reassurance they want, they become angry and standoffish. To them, someone not validating them is akin to their worst fears coming to fruition.
9. They need to be in control
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Not feeling secure within themselves, people who are easily offended look for ways to dominate their surroundings. They may control their partner by saying they can't go out with friends or are very strict with their own diet. It's the only stability they have in their life, at least in their mind.
But when that need for control is taken away, they become aggressive and irate. They will push back and use any means necessary to have things go their way. They use this reaction of being offended as a way to further control the situation and manipulate it in their favor.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.