8 Things You Should And Shouldn't Do If You Think You're Being 'Quiet Fired' From Your Job
It can feel hopeless to feel like you're being forced out.
JackF | Canva You’ve heard of quiet quitting, but what can you do if you’re being quiet fired? According to a LinkedIn poll, 35% of people reported experiencing this problem directly, while 48% observed it occurring in their workplace. Unlike quiet quitting, quiet firing is much more sinister.
Essentially, it’s when a manager works to make life at that job so untenable that their employee is forced to quit. This saves the company severance, sure, but it also gives them cover to point a finger when the employee leaves, a real “It’s not me, it’s you” situation.
Here are 8 things you should and shouldn't do if you think you're being quiet fired from your job:
1. You should document everything
Make a folder on your desktop and save everything there. I’m talking e-mails, meeting notes, meeting recordings, etc. If you get fired, you have a load of evidence to take to HR or a lawyer if need be.
HR recommends documenting everything for several reasons, including legal compliance, fair and consistent treatment, evidence for decisions, and protection during termination. Sinapi Law Associates explains that documentation can help to build a stronger case in the event of a discrimination or retaliation claim. It shows that the employee took the necessary steps to try and resolve the situation before pursuing legal action.
2. You should hold your boundaries
Just because there are new rules doesn’t mean that your need to be treated with respect goes away. If something stands in contradiction to your safety or well-being, saying no is always okay.
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3. You should devote time to finding your next step
Whether it’s transferring to another team within your organization or getting a new job, spending time on yourself and your best interest is important.
Janice Gassam Asare, a Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) and Racial Equity Consultant cautions that quitting should only be a final resort, especially with concerns about a looming recession and a slew of layoffs and hiring freezes. Instead, she recommends looking at employee resource groups or even joining unions to ensure that workers know their rights and can speak up if they feel they are being undervalued.
4. You should give yourself time to heal
This is a very stressful and traumatic experience to be targeted in this way. It’s okay to feel a range of emotions, and it’s okay to need time to heal from this experience. Give yourself the care you need to protect your mental and emotional health.
5. You shouldn't take it personally
It isn’t about you. If a manager is trying to force an employee out, they don’t have an interest in being a leader. It is the role of a manager to set their employees up for success. They know it’s wrong to set you up to fail, which is why they take measures to ostracize you.
6. You shouldn't complain to other employees
You mustn’t give your manager anything to add to their case to fire you. Bad-mouthing your manager could get you in trouble even if they aren’t actively trying to force you out.
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7. You shouldn't buy into their criteria for success
It’s easy to be hard on yourself when your manager is constantly setting you up for failure. Keep doing your best within what is reasonable, and remember that they’re redefining success to set you up to fail.
8. You shouldn't give up on yourself
You have so much to offer. This workplace and this manager might not be the right fit, but you have so much to be proud of. You deserve a workplace and a manager that sees you for all the great things you bring to the table.
It’s a tough situation to realize you are being quietly fired. More than anything, from my experience, I learned that my self-worth was independent of my work.
I knew I deserved better and sought a work environment where I could feel safe. If you find yourself in a similar situation, I hope you find what you deserve, too.
Janica Kaneshiro is a writer and life coach dedicated to helping women, queer folks, and BIPOC people navigate major life changes and find themselves in the process. She is a contributing writer focusing on DEIA topics, relationships, communication, workplace conflict, and self-improvement.