If You Want To Live A Much Better Life, It's Time To Start Saying No To These 10 Things
"No" is a complete sentence, and it's time you start using it.
Vovatol | Shutterstock Having a higher quality of life can seem elusive, like it exists just out of reach. We spend a significant portion of our lives doing what we're supposed to do. Kids go to school, adults go to work, and there's little time in between to truly enjoy ourselves.
We're accustomed to saying "yes," but agreeing to everything can make us feel depleted and resentful.
Here are 10 things to start saying 'no' to if you want to live a much better life
1. Spending time with fake friends
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It's scientifically proven that socializing is good for our physical and mental health. Having friends makes people feel like their lives are more satisfying, while lowering their risk of depression and decreasing the likelihood of premature mortality.
There's value to developing different kinds of friendships, from neighbors we exchange pleasantries with to close confidants, the proverbial ride-or-die friends who make us laugh until our stomachs hurt and support us when life becomes hard to handle.
As important as it is to cultivate friendships, there are certain friends who drain our energy instead of lifting our spirits, like the ones who constantly complain or don't show up when we're in need.
A 2023 study established that the quality of friendships predicts well-being throughout a person's life, especially for one particular age group. Friendship quality at 30 years old predicts the well-being of people at age 50, meaning that having high-quality friends can keep you healthier later in life.
Saying "no" to imbalanced friendships and focusing on the people who truly nourish you will boost your well-being and make your life happier.
2. Overworking yourself
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Having a job is a hallmark of adulthood. While work can provide us with a sense of purpose, spending too much time working is a direct path to high stress, lower life satisfaction, and inevitable burnout.
Getting ahead in your career requires focus and dedication, but saying "yes" to every project that comes your way can negatively impact your quality of life.
According to the aptly-named American Institute of Stress, 83% of employees in the U.S. report experiencing daily workplace stress, and 76% say that stress affects their personal relationships.
Setting clear boundaries in the workplace can lower your immediate stress levels and reduce your risk of burning out along the way. Say "no" to working more than you should. Don't check your email after you clock out. Wait until the following workday to respond to messages. Give yourself a mental break from the daily grind and take note of how much better you feel.
3. Devoting all your energy to others
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You can't drive a car with an empty gas tank and you can't pour from an empty cup. If you're the kind of person who extends themselves and gives until they're exhausted, try saying "no" and taking time for yourself.
It's always nice to be in service to people in your community, but overextending yourself will only make you feel off-kilter. Leaning out when you need to recharge can ease your stress and lead you toward a more balanced life. True self-care can replenish your energy, helping you find your inner peace, which you absolutely deserve.
4. Buying unnecessary items
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It can be tempting to buy into the latest trends, saying "yes" to your favorite influencer's outfit of the day. But the dopamine rush wears off quickly, and then you're left with a pile of barely-worn crop tops at the bottom of your closet.
According to a United Nations report from 2019, the average consumer bought 60% more articles of clothing than they did 15 years earlier, and each item was kept for half as long. Overconsumption is also a major global issue. Fast fashion is the world's second largest consumer of water and it accounts for 10% of worldwide emissions.
Instead of obsessively shopping online, try shopping your closet and recycling your wardrobe. Saying "no" to buying more stuff will save you money. Using what you already have in the house can spark your creativity and help you declutter your living space, which leads to peace of mind.
5. Staying stuck in your routine
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There are proven physical and mental health benefits to having an established routine.
Maintaining a steady sleep schedule helps you get a good night's rest, which, in turn, can help you manage stress and anxiety. Carving out time to move your body a little bit every day keeps you healthy in mind, body, and mood, whether it's walking your dog around the block or dancing to your favorite song in the kitchen.
As stabilizing as it is to live by a schedule, it's also possible to get bogged down in your daily routine, which can create a sense of boredom and general malaise. You don't have to upend all your plans, but trying something new a few times a week will help you shake things up and bring a little adventure into your life.
6. Avoiding hard tasks
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It's totally normal and almost expected to put certain things off. After all, watching TV is more enjoyable than cleaning the bathroom, and doing literally any activity is more pleasant than making important phone calls and scheduling appointments.
According to a study published by the American Psychological Association, task avoidance leads to feelings of failure, which leads to further task avoidance, on and on until the end of time, while your mail piles up and your bathroom is still dirty.
So, say "no" to ignoring the tough chores and pieces of life administration you'd rather not do, and dive right in. Try writing a list of what you need to accomplish and cross one item off each day. Future you will thank you for it.
7. Abandoning your dreams
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As we get older, it's easy to stop dreaming. We tend to overlook our imaginations in order to pay closer attention to our reality. While tending to the life we have is the practical thing to do, denying ourselves the opportunity for wonder and awe is, well... boring.
You might not be a rockstar, but you can pick up your guitar and play just for fun. You can do art projects just because they bring you joy. You can learn a new sport or teach yourself to cook new recipes.
Give yourself time for small, daily joys, and you'll feel happier sooner than you think.
8. Skipping meals
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We've all been taught that eating a balanced diet is good for us, yet many people report being too busy to fit in three square meals a day, despite the health risks associated with skipping meals.
The Journal of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics reported that around 40% of Americans skip meals. Among people between the ages of 20 and 74, at least one in five said they skip breakfast or lunch.
Not eating consistently makes people more tired than usual, causes their blood sugar levels to spike, and interferes with their metabolism. Say "no" to being hangry. Do yourself, and everyone around you, the distinct favor of making sure you eat.
9. Ignoring your body's messages
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Along with the idea that being well-nourished is a crucial part of having a healthy, happy life, listening to other messages your body sends is equally as important.
It's entirely normalized to push through exhaustion and avoid taking care of ourselves in basic ways, yet doing so depletes our energy until we crash and burn. Stop avoiding what your body says and rest when you need to, so that you can replenish yourself and live your life to the fullest.
10. Being too busy
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It's easy to get lost in the chaos of the day to day, whether you're a parent in charge of carpool rides or a student buried in homework.
Taking time away from what needs to get done is a great way to realign yourself to your life's true purpose. Sure, there may be dishes in the sink and laundry in the hamper, but there's also fresh air and sunshine and soft grass to bury your bare feet in.
Don't go to social events you'd rather not attend. Sleep through soccer practice on Saturday morning every now and then. Turn down invitations to dinner parties, so you can read a book or take a bath or just do nothing at all.
Saying "yes" can open the door to new opportunities and new perspectives, but then again, so can saying "no."
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers social issues, pop culture analysis and all things to do with the entertainment industry.