11 Things Boomers Do That Make Gen Z Uncomfortable Instantly
A great deal of generational resentment can be chalked up to misunderstandings.
MDV Edwards | Shutterstock The generational divide and lingering resentment is often discussed in ways that further separate and isolate generations from empathetic engagement with one another. But how often are we truly digging deep, addressing changing societal norms, generational discomfort, and values that can help to explain this tension? The world is constantly evolving, so younger generations are growing up in a space much different from their parents and grandparents, but why are we offended by their modern beliefs and values?
There are a number of things boomers do that make Gen Z uncomfortable instantly, and vice versa, largely because this generation is much different from their older counterparts. They're not only more racially and ethnically diverse, they're digital natives, change-makers, and adults navigating an incredibly unique time in the world. They're going to communicate their discomfort, make changes, and prioritize things to a different degree than baby boomers, but that doesn’t make any specific thing "right or wrong," it simply adds context to initiatives aimed at bringing age groups together.
Here are 11 things boomers do that make Gen Z uncomfortable instantly
1. Arguing with service workers
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Over 70% of baby boomers believe they're the "most reliable" generation, both at work and in their personal lives, according to a survey conducted by Talker Research. While there's certainly a stereotype that boomers are inherently more entitled than other generations, surveys like this explain the misconception: their values of hard work and loyalty are different, so they view younger generations like Gen Z as collectively less "reliable" by their own standards.
Even in passing interactions and social situations like dining out at a restaurant, these subtle value differences and generational mindsets can butt heads, causing baby boomers to get a bad rap sending food back or arguing with a service worker.
They may harbor a mentality like "the customer is always right," considering they place an emphasis on the value of their money and spending patterns in society, that strictly opposes many young service workers' basic expectations for respect or empathy.
These kinds of misunderstandings and misalignments can make unsuspecting things like arguing with a service worker one of the things boomers do that make Gen Z uncomfortable instantly, especially because Gen Zers are also collectively more socially anxious and less confrontational in their social interactions.
2. Overstepping work boundaries
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Many of the underlying themes of "hustle culture" that baby boomers bought into early in their lives and careers — like a strong work ethic, sacrifice, or loyalty — aren't proving as fruitful for younger generations, especially Gen Zers who value meaning, purpose, and work-life balance more than compensation in their careers.
Baby boomer bosses, parents, and grandparents may be more likely to urge their Gen Z family members and peers to overwork themselves for the sake of success, despite research that suggests "hard work" is no longer the solitary key to success in the modern world, and sacrifice things like work boundaries or work-life balance for their careers.
Even subtle things like expecting people to answer their phone outside of working hours or come in on the weekends are things boomers do that make Gen Z uncomfortable instantly. In most cases, they're well-intended suggestions and pressures from boomers trying to help their close friends, peers, and family members succeed.
But it's simply not the way anymore, especially for pragmatic Gen Z professionals looking out for their own well-being and personal time. While they do want to find a sense of meaning, belonging, and purpose in their careers, Gen Z doesn't view work as their entire identity or life's purpose to the same degree many boomer professionals did.
3. Making crude or ignorant jokes
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Times have changed and, along with it, language and slang. What's seemingly "appropriate" for Gen Zers to say — from internet lingo to casual jokes — is far different from the language that baby boomers use in their daily lives. While, in most cases, this is entirely okay and nonconfrontational, there are some social situations where this difference can cause discomfort and tension.
Oftentimes, the stereotypical jokes and ignorant language that can sneak in older generation's language repertoire boils down to offense. Certain things can seep into jokes or phrases they use unknowingly, at the expense of Gen Zer's comfort, a generation that's very intentional about language, values, and societal issues.
Everyone has the freedom to say what they want, but that means they also have the right to call out language, phrases, and jokes that they don't like.
4. Stopping by unannounced
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Many baby boomers place a strong emphasis on the value of family in their daily lives. They not only spend a lot of time nurturing their relationships and building community with their family and friends, they have unique habits that ensure they're able to connect and communicate with them.
However, it's these same habits — things like stopping by unannounced or calling without warning — that are also some of the things boomers do that make Gen Z uncomfortable instantly. Young people like Gen Z are intentional with boundaries and social time, not just because they tend to grapple with more social anxiety, but because they are adamant about protecting their well-being.
When their parents or grandparents stop by unannounced, they're not only subtly disrespecting those boundaries, they're forcing their kids or grandkids to make time, space, and emotional energy to interact without warning or preparation. For some, it's not a big deal to have a casual chat; some may even appreciate being forced out of their comfort zone by an unannounced visit. But for others, it's a point of tension and frustration.
5. Giving unsolicited advice
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Baby boomers' tendency to give unprompted or unsolicited advice to Gen Zers often comes from a well-intended place; however, the advice they're giving often stems from a world that no longer exists and experiences that are wholly misguided in the state of the current world.
Licensed marriage and family therapist Sarah Epstein argues that unsolicited advice is one of the common ways baby boomers spark tension and resentment in casual conversations with their Gen Z counterparts, whether it's a boss and co-worker or a parent and their adult child.
Sometimes, Gen Zers just want to feel heard, understood, and supported when they're expressing their thoughts and opinions, not urged to adopt advice that "solves" their struggles or feelings.
6. Calling instead of texting
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Many Gen Zers feel entirely uncomfortable talking on the phone, influenced by social anxiety or the convenience of texting, but for baby boomers, it's often their primary form of communication. It's one of the things boomers do that make Gen Z uncomfortable instantly, calling them over the phone, rather than sending a text.
But for older generations, it's intended to be sincere. They view the practice of phone calls as a more thoughtful approach to communication over texting, so their tendency to call is truly a manifestation of their values for relationships, connection, and family.
This disconnect over phone etiquette and digital manners between generations can spark a lot of tension, even if it's casual habits like talking on speakerphone in public or using specific lingo over text.
7. Blaming people for their financial status
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Considering many American baby boomers grew up in a world defined by "hard work and the American Dream," it's not surprising that many of them view people living in marginalized communities, low-income situations, or an unemployed reality as victims of their own choices.
Most believe that hard work is the key to success — that if you're struggling, you have the sole power to transform your economic, professional, social, personal, or financial situation. But, like many Gen Zers have acknowledged first-hand, that's not always the case.
By suggesting that this is a choice and essentially blaming people for their financial status, baby boomers can make Gen Z feel instantly uncomfortable, especially those already confronting financial instability and money stress. Things like homeownership, finding a secure job, and starting a family feel impossible for many Gen Zers, and hearing their boomer peers blame them for not being able to engage can be isolating and uncomfortable.
8. Being flippant about mental health
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Mental health issues aren't something you can simply overcome or "push through" with self-discipline, despite what many baby boomers believe having grown up in a society that demonized emotional struggles and mental illness.
The stigma around mental health that Gen Z is trying to challenge in their daily lives — setting boundaries, talking about their mental health, and sharing their emotions — is the same stigma that informed many baby boomers mindsets around vulnerability and seeking support.
Especially for things like substance abuse disorder that have only recently been recognized by formal health organizations as a true disorder, baby boomers may still act flippantly around certain mental health topics, to the extent that it "blames" or "guilts" Gen Zers into believing they're at fault for their own struggles.
9. Using phrases like 'well, when I was a kid...'
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Many baby boomers have a tendency to use phrases like "well, when I was a kid" or "when I grew up..." to give unsolicited advice to Gen Zers in their lives. While they can be well-intended, they can occasionally make young people feel uncomfortable, dismissed, and unheard.
The world is changing. Of course, young people can benefit from experience, guidance, and advice, but dismissing their current struggles with advice well suited to your own situation isn't always as helpful as it may seem.
Especially for Gen Zers who pride themselves on being change-makers and challenging traditional norms and stereotypes, phrases like "it is what it is" or "that's just the way the world works" can be another thing boomers say that make Gen Z uncomfortable instantly.
10. Using the thumbs up emoji
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It seems subtle and even silly for some baby boomers who may not be "digital natives" in the same way their Gen Z counterparts are, but little things like using the thumbs up emoji or texting "K" in response to a text can feel uncomfortable and even offensive.
Research from PLOS One indicates that people want to feel heard, and the means by which they communicate and spark those feelings look different depending on the person. But sometimes, recognizing that these casual digital habits — like using a specific emoji or phrase — can have more profound meaning can help to bridge the gap and reduce misunderstandings between baby boomers and Gen Zers.
11. Enforcing a rigid dress code
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Gen Zers are challenging and changing a lot of things about the workforce, including the stereotypical standards for "appropriate" office attire and dress codes.
They value feeling comfortable and uniquely expressing themselves in ways that these rigid expectations often suppress, so it's not surprising that when their boomer bosses expect them to follow a dress code, they feel instantly uncomfortable.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
