11 Subtle Habits Of An Irrational Person That Normal People Don’t Do
Not everyone is calm and collected.
gabllima | Shutterstock We’ve all met someone whose behavior defies reason — a person whose everyday actions seem to betray an underlying irrationality. Unlike those who approach life with balance and clarity, these individuals exhibit subtle habits that set them apart and disrupt their relationships and personal well-being.
From overdramatizing trivial matters to avoiding accountability, there are subtle habits of an irrational person that normal individuals don’t exhibit.
The 11 subtle habits of an irrational person that normal people don't do:
1.They obsess over worst-case scenarios.
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Irrational people are chronic overthinkers and, as a result, don't know how to turn off their negative thoughts. Because of this, their subtle habit of seeing the worst outcome impacts their mental health for the worst.
According to one study published in Social Science & Medicine, overthinking is often associated with mood disorders and anxiety.
Despite this fact, irrational people will continue to jump to the worst-case scenario regardless of how it impacts their mental health. Still, if irrational people want to avoid this, finding ways to ground those negative thoughts is best.
Clinical psychologist Carla Shuman, Ph.D., suggested that gratitude and managing expectations are great places to start. Furthermore, feeling those intense emotions will be even better.
She continued, "Allowing ourselves to feel every emotion, without pushing it away, means that even when we are disappointed, we know it will be OK."
2.They relentlessly seek external validation.
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Who hasn't sought validation at some point? During our teenage or college years, when life is uncertain, it's normal to need validation occasionally. That said, most normal people grow out of this mindset and realize that the only validation they truly need is their own.
Unfortunately, a subtle habit of an irrational person that normal people don't do is constantly seeking validation. Regardless of age, an unreasonable person will continue to expect the most from others.
Whether it's a friend or family member, an irrational person will cling to others and expect their constant reassurance.
Nonetheless, this is concerning, as a 2023 review revealed a connection between attachment anxiety and PTSD, along with other emotional issues. Knowing this, people need to set boundaries if they ever come across these types of people. Otherwise, their mental health might suffer.
3.They let emotion override logic.
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Everyone gets emotional from time to time and, as a result, says or does things they don't mean. Even so, a subtle habit of an irrational person that normal people don't do is rely on emotion over logic.
Constantly relying on emotion is a recipe for disaster, but in the eyes of an irrational person, it's the only way to fulfill their desire to be heard and understood.
That said, this inherent desire isn't necessarily negative. Most people secretly wish to be understood by those around them. A study published in the American Journal of Lifestyle and Medicine found that feeling connected often improves mental and physical health.
Despite this fact, choosing to act irrationally and get overly emotional while in the middle of an argument is a recipe for disaster. So, instead, people should aim to take a break and wait until both parties cool down before continuing.
4.They shift blame to external circumstances.
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Most people know one person who insists the universe is out to get them. With an exaggerated sigh, they claim their constant lateness is due to external circumstances. However, they can't help it — it's a subtle habit of an irrational person that normal people don't exhibit.
Firstly, it's important to understand why blaming things on Mother Nature is a bad choice. Not only is it completely irrational, but it excuses their bad behavior or actions.
Known as the self-serving bias, this is when people take credit for success and place blame on external factors.
With this in mind, irrational people aren't just hurting themselves but, arguably, hurting other people in the process. When others know irrational people will never be upfront and honest, it can cause tension, impacting their overall relationship.
5.They hold onto grudges.
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They say that there will always be a need to forgive and let bygones be bygones. Whether it's family drama or relationship problems, learning the art of forgiveness is beneficial in many ways.
One study published in 2022 found that forgiveness decreases anger, depression, and hostility while increasing self-esteem. However, a subtle habit of irrational individuals that rational people do not exhibit is holding grudges.
Holding onto negative energy can be detrimental for many reasons, the most significant one being its effect on mental health.
Constantly reminiscing and refusing to let go can build up resentment quickly. If people aren't careful, contempt can enter a relationship, ending it. Yet, even if people don't have a close relationship with those they are holding a grudge, it can still impact their mental health.
KU Medical Center cited that negative thinking distracts people and leads to self-debasing thinking. Furthermore, the more people practice negative thinking, the more automatic it becomes, leading to self-doubt.
So, even if it's hard, find ways to let go of the past. Otherwise, it'll impact them in the long run.
6.They craft elaborate justifications.
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Honesty is crucial, even when the truth is unpleasant. Regardless of people's preferences, dishonesty can rapidly damage relationships and is often hard to mend. A common behavior of irrational individuals that typical people avoid is fabricating stories to rationalize their emotions or beliefs.
According to a study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science, even when the truth hurts, it's better to be honest than lie in a relationship, as honesty leads to closeness.
Even so, irrational people don't care if their dishonesty hurts those around them. They'll make up whatever story serves their purpose as long as they can justify their feelings or thoughts.
That said, irrational people should exercise caution when engaging in this behavior. Continuously lying and fabricating stories can swiftly come back to haunt them, potentially damaging their relationships with loved ones.
7.They dodge accountability.
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The most uncomfortable feeling is getting into an unexpected argument with a loved one. If you aren't careful, heated back-and-forth and unintended jabs can quickly lead to high tensions.
A common habit of an irrational person, which normal people do not exhibit, is avoiding accountability. In the eyes of an irrational individual, they can do no wrong. Therefore, it wasn't their fault for saying those awful things; it's your fault.
If the other person weren't being so 'irrational' and rude, they wouldn't have snapped like that in the first place.
Regrettably, this mindset will not take them very far. It will hinder their growth and damage their relationships over time. Licensed marriage and family therapist Jason Whiting, Ph.D., states, "Chronic defensiveness inhibits growth and change and is a reliable predictor of divorce and relationship failure."
But at the end of the day, this isn't anyone's problem but their own. So, even if it sucks, sometimes, cutting off a person unable to take accountability might be an option worth considering. After all, nobody likes to be blamed endlessly, right?
8.They engage in all-or-nothing dialogues.
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Many people have experienced a heated conversation with someone irrational. It might have started as a minor disagreement and escalated into a significant issue. In any case, a typical behavior of irrational individuals that reasonable people typically avoid is participating in all-or-nothing discussions.
Firstly, it's unfair to put terms and limits into conversations. People should remember that in everyday situations, it's important to compromise.
Despite this, irrational people don't listen, which makes them feel unheard and, by extension, misunderstood.
According to a study in 2022, feeling misunderstood predicts higher stress, lower life satisfaction, and motivation.
Despite this fact, irrational people won't ever change, so the next best thing is to disengage with them completely. By saying, "I feel uncomfortable and unheard," people can walk away until an irrational person stops or is willing to engage respectfully.
9.They exaggerate minor issues.
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Everyone can be dramatic occasionally, and minor issues can quickly become more significant problems without proper care. However, the difference between an irrational person versus a normal person is that an unreasonable person will purposely do this over most minor issues.
For example, if someone neglects to wash the dishes, a typical person might gently remind them. In contrast, an irrational person might react explosively. This behavior is problematic; frequent outbursts can unsettle others and damage relationships or friendships if not appropriately managed.
That said, there are ways to calm down in these situations. In addition to deep breathing exercises, people can request twenty-minute breaks or wait five seconds before responding.
Though this might seem tedious, doing things like this will make it easier for irrational people to reel their feelings before responding, helping the situation de-escalate.
10.They play mind games in relationships.
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Every relationship begins sweet and gentle. Couples feel heard, understood, and, most importantly, safe in their partnerships. Unfortunately, this loving relationship can quickly take a turn as a subtle habit of an irrational person, which normal people don't indulge in, is playing mental games within a partnership.
It should go without saying that emotional manipulation is no joke.
Emotional manipulation can cause people to end up in toxic or even abusive situations.
But irrational people aren't ones others can reason with, so they have only two options: stay and try to make it work or leave.
This habit may slowly disappear by openly expressing how they feel and seeking help. However, it's better to end this sort of relationship for their safety. Otherwise, people's mental health can quickly be impacted for the worse.
11.They assume the worst of others.
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Ultimately, the final subtle behavior of an irrational person that rational individuals tend to avoid is presuming the hostile intentions of others.
It's understandable to assume the worst about a stranger. Given the perception of increasing danger in the world, it's natural for someone to lean toward such assumptions. However, there's a significant difference between assuming the worst about a stranger and assuming the worst about everyone.
People who have been friends with others for years aren't keen to assume the worst about them. Unfortunately, irrational people aren't the most logical, so they mistrust everyone they meet.
While this behavior is regrettable, it doesn't have to persist. If someone genuinely finds it challenging to trust others, being honest and asking for help is best. Otherwise, this pattern will only deepen, leading to lasting harm over time.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.