People Who Make Decisions Like This Live Life With Fewer Regrets, Says New Study
Fewer regrets means a happier life.
stockfour | Shutterstock We can all probably remember a specific moment in life when a decision wasn't the best and led to regret. It can be easy to kick yourself once you think you've made a bad decision, but hindsight is 20/20.
As it turns out, how you made that bad decision might actually impact how much you regret the decision. A recent study found that there's actually a difference between someone feeling regret over a bad decision they made versus a bad decision they made at the advice of others.
A study found that people who make decisions without input from others live life with fewer regrets.
In a study published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, professors at Cornell University conducted a series of experiments designed to encourage their subjects to make bad decisions.
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For example, they offered participants the option between two lotteries. One group was given advice on which lottery to choose, and the other group chose on their own. Both groups were designed to lose, but what the researchers found was that the group that made the decision on their own had less regret about their choice.
Researchers found that those who made the bad decision on their own had less regret and chalked it up to 'bad luck.'
Sunita Sah, a co-author of the study explained, "This effect could extend beyond small decisions … Our research highlights the importance of rejecting suggestions that go against our better judgments. People often assume that following someone else’s suggestion will shield them from responsibility or regret. But in reality, the opposite happens. You end up feeling worse when you ignore what you knew was the better choice."
Kaitlin Woolley, another co-author of the study, said she thought the opposite would be true. She explained, "If you have another person in the decision process, you would think that’s going to help spread the responsibility. And yet not only do people not blame the adviser more, they’re blaming themselves more."
Basically, it's a whole heck of a lot better for your peace of mind to make decisions — good or bad — solely on your own. Sure, you can factor in advice from others, but as long as the ultimate choice is yours, you'll live with a lot less regret.
There are good lessons in making bad decisions.
While it might make sense that we should try to avoid bad decisions altogether, making the wrong choice is inevitable sometimes. These mistakes or bad decisions deserve a mindset shift though. Look at them through the lens of a life lesson. In order to grow and learn we have to make mistakes — on our own.
Perhaps that's exactly what the study reflected. People with the confidence to own their bad decisions and learn from them have less regret than people who blindly follow others because they are too afraid to trust themselves.
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York University professor, Dr. Robert A. Kenedy, wisely wrote, "Accepting mistakes is not the same as loving them. Few people are happy when they mess up, whether it's a small or large blunder. And accepting imperfection is certainly not about being lazy or careless — quite the opposite. But we need to believe in our gut — not just acknowledge in our mind — that it's all right to stumble and [mess] up and try again. In fact, it's not just OK, it's necessary."
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.