The Simple Grammar Rule That Makes You Look Smarter & More Sophisticated If You Get It Right — But Most People Get It Wrong
It's small, but majorly effective.
BongkarnGraphic / Shutterstock If you want to appear polished and intelligent, a great way to do that is to make sure you’re using proper grammar. Grammar seems like a small thing, but it can leave a big impression.
There are many grammar rules out there, and it can be confusing to try to follow them all. However, there is one rule that stands out because of how often people get it wrong.
One simple grammar rule will completely change people’s perception of you if you follow it.
TikTok content creator Rebekah Ketcham shared an important grammar rule she and many others struggle with in a video.
“There is one grammar rule that makes you look so much smarter and more sophisticated if you get it right, and most people get it wrong,” she said.
Ketcham explained, “This is something my grandmother always corrects me on to this day, even though I try so hard to get it right, and I just have to share it.”
“It’s the her and him, she and he of it all,” she insisted.
Ketcham used an example to illustrate what she meant. “Her and I went to the grocery store,” she said. “No. No.”
“Why is that wrong?” she asked. “Remove the ‘and I.’ Her went to the grocery store? No.”
“She went to the grocery store,” Ketcham clarified. “She and I went to the grocery store.”
Ketcham appeared amused while looking away from the camera. “My boyfriend is literally annoyed right now that I’m making this video, but it’s ‘cause he never gets this right,” she said.
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Although it may not be immediately obvious, there is a big difference between ‘she’ and ‘her.’
Etiquette expert Susie Wilson wrote about the differences between “she” and “her” for LinkedIn. Wilson explained that while both words are pronouns, “she” can only be used as such. On the other hand, “her” can also be used as an adjective.
“‘She’ and ‘her’ are two words that mean almost the same thing, but they get used in different circumstances,” Wilson said. “Their similarities are what makes them so hard to differentiate.”
Proper grammar really does make a difference.
It’s easy to think of grammar as a minor thing that no one really notices. However, this isn’t the case, even if it’s something we only notice on a subconscious level.
English professor Cathleen Small at the University of California Berkeley said, “Using proper grammar in your communications sets you apart from the rest. Even if the person reading your correspondence doesn’t actively think, ‘Wow, nice use of grammar!’ they certainly notice.”
You might not be able to put your finger on just why you’re impressed by someone’s speaking or writing, but chances are you are picking up on the subtle cues presented by their grammar. This can have a huge effect on people’s lives.
Small went on to say, “If two people with similar qualifications submit a résumé and cover letter for an open job, and one has a flawless cover letter while the other one has some grammatical errors, I guarantee the error-free, grammatically correct one will get the first call.”
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While many people tend to overlook grammar when they are writing, and especially when they are speaking, the reality is that it can have a huge impact on your life. It directly affects the way that people perceive you.
More specifically, in this example from Professor Small, grammar could affect your ability to get a good job.
If grammar can be a factor in one’s search for employment or perhaps one’s ability to remain employed, it is certainly worth paying attention to.
While grammar is something many of us wish we could have skipped in school, it is important. As Ketcham said, proper grammar can make you appear “smarter and more sophisticated.” Who doesn’t want that?
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news and human interest topics.