10 Signs Someone In Your Life Is Deeply Unhappy, According To Psychology
You never really know what someone is going through, unless you pay close attention.
Nikolai Kazakov | Shutterstock Happiness is an essential part of a fulfilling existence. After all, happy people tend to live longer. But even though you have found contentment, there are some not-so-obvious signs someone in your life is deeply unhappy.
Some people might express contentment with their lives, sharing all the joyful things they get to do on a daily basis. Other times, people who are actually happy keep a neutral disposition, choosing instead to keep their cheer hidden. On the flip side, others may give off a certain vibe that indicates their discontent.
Here are 10 signs someone in your life is deeply unhappy, according to psychology
1. They isolate themselves
fizkes | Shutterstock
Human beings crave social connection, so when someone begins to isolate themselves, it's a bit alarming. People who spend time together do so from an instinctual drive, meaning they need to get their basic needs met.
If someone isn't seeking out socialization, it's likely because they're unhappy and potentially depressed. According to a study in "General Psychiatry," isolation is a coping mechanism designed to deal with worry and stress, and to avoid human interaction. Yet people who have this behavior are likely to suffer from depression and anxiety, making them deeply unhappy.
When someone in your life says they prefer to be alone, and refuses to make human contact, it's a glaring sign they are deeply unhappy.
2. They have unhealthy eating habits
Estrada Anton | Pexels
People obviously need food to survive, so when someone in your life has a strange eating pattern, it's cause for concern. Without consistent meals, people don't have the energy to get through the day, leading to poor behavior and even poorer work ethic.
A 2017 study found that eating poorly can impact a person's health. Specifically, eating too much or too little was found to increase a person's risk of heart disease, stroke, or type 2 diabetes.
However, eating poorly can also impact mental health. Research from the Journal of the Missouri State Medical Association determined that a deficiency in things like vitamin B12, B9, and zinc lead to depression, poor mood, tiredness, cognitive decline, and irritability.
As a person who cares about their loved one's needs, encourage that person in your life to maintain a healthy diet, eating starchy carbohydrates, high-fiber foods, fruits, vegetables, and fish.
3. They feel constantly drained
Ground Picture | Shutterstock
Feeling tired all the time isn't normal and might be a sign of burnout.
According to the Institute for Quality and Efficiency in Health Care, stressful lifestyles put people under pressure and lead to feelings of exhaustion and burnout. Though burnout may seem insignificant, it can impact a person's mental health, leading to emotional and spiritual exhaustion, tiredness, depression, and anxiety.
To help someone avoid burnout, the American Psychological Association recommends doing a few helpful things for your loved one: assessing their self-care, trying mindfulness techniques, refraining from doing work at home, and moving around.
4. They experience mood swings
fizkes | Shutterstock
Feeling irritable and snapping at others is a sign someone in your life is deeply unhappy, whether it's from their relationships, job, or factors outside of their control.
Calm people don't usually feel the urge to snap or get into someone's face to prove their point; rather, if someone is truly collected and at peace, they'll walk away or have a civil conversation. Yet people who are at their wit's end feel like they have no room to breathe, leading to mood swings. The International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health says that people who work long hours are more likely to have depression, anxiety, dangerous thoughts, and worse emotional well-being.
If someone is overworked, they must engage in a good self-care routine. It's important to help your deeply unhappy loved one to do things they enjoy that are relaxing, like reading a good book, taking a hot bath, or getting a massage at the spa.
5. They tend to zone out
RealPeopleStudio | Shutterstock
While some people tend to daydream, a big sign someone in your life is deeply unhappy is if they zone out frequently, especially when socializing with others. They may have a lot on their mind and are thinking about how to proceed.
Research from the journal "Chronic Stress" found that overstressing causes an imbalance of neural circuitry in the brain, leading to poor decision-making skills, anxiety, depression, and a change in mood and behavior. For a person zoning out, their mind is experiencing an imbalance and needs more time to process information.
Allow this person that time to regroup. In the meantime, try engaging them in activities like yoga, exercise, or painting to get their mind off of whatever challenges they are going through.
6. They sleep a lot
SeventyFour | Shutterstock
People need their rest, of course, but oversleeping can be a sign of depression or exhaustion. According to clinical research published in "Dialogues in Clinical Neuroscience," 40% of depressed young adults and 10% of depressed older adults experience hypersomnia, a neurological disorder where people feel excessively sleepy or sleep for long periods of time. Too much sleep can be a bad thing, as it leads to psychiatric diseases and a higher BMI.
The Sleep Foundation recommends setting a regular sleep schedule, creating a bedtime routine, fixing your sleep environment, and keeping active. If you have a deeply unhappy person in your life who sleeps too much, encourage them to seek help if their sleep patterns are out of whack.
7. They've lost interest in their hobbies
fizkes | Shutterstock
Anhedonia is when someone loses interest or pleasure in something. It's a key sign of depression but is rarely targeted when treating patients with this mental disorder. Because of this, people who experience anhedonia end up having poor treatment outcomes, leading them to fall back into depression. Anhedonia leads to a loss of motivation, sense of connection, and comprehension of situations.
When someone you know no longer finds pleasure in their interests, it's a good indicator that something isn't right. Losing interest in hobbies is one of the biggest signs someone in your life is deeply unhappy, and could be depressed and in need of help.
8. They're overly critical of themselves
Arthur Bargan | Shutterstock
People who are overly critical of themselves tend to have low self-esteem because they have no self-compassion. It can be alarming to this person's close friends and family when that self-criticism just doesn't seem to end, and can indicate that they are unhappy. After all, low self-esteem is linked to depression, substance abuse, antisocial behavior, and dangerous thoughts.
When you notice someone has a tendency to never cut themselves some slack or reward themselves for doing something right, it means they don't see themselves in a positive light. It's important to tell your loved one all the great things about them and encourage them to seek professional help.
9. They have unexplainable physical pain
GBJSTOCK | Shutterstock
Most people complain about physical pain to the point that those around them might not even bat an eye. But experiencing unexplainable pain constantly could be a sign someone is deeply unhappy or mentally unwell and needs help.
Chronic physical pain can be associated with both substance abuse and mental illness. Many people experiencing chronic pain also suffer from depression and personality disorders, leading to them being discontent.
Aside from seeking professional medical help for their ailments, if someone in your life is experiencing pain in this way, ask how you can be there for them, whether that means taking them to appointments, cooking them meals, or just providing emotional support.
10. They see the worst in everything
fizkes | Shutterstock
Being unable to experience joy or constantly finding the bad in any good situation is a sign that someone is deeply unhappy. Most people can switch between positive and negative thoughts, yet having constant negative thoughts only makes your mental health worse.
If someone close is having a hard time staying positive, it's recommended that they see a professional; otherwise, their health might be at risk. Encourage this person in your life to get help and, over time, they can dig themselves out of the hole of unhappiness.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.