12 Signs You’re More Empathic Than The Average Person, According To Psychology
If you've always felt a deeper connection to people's emotions, you may have a more empathic nature.
Odua Images | Shutterstock Dr. Chivonna Childs, a psychologist, succinctly expressed what it means to be an empath. “An empath is a person who has the ability to feel what others are feeling and understand what others are feeling,” she said. “They’re also known to feel feelings on a deeper level and take on the feelings of others.”
About one to two percent of people are true empaths. For many, being an empath can feel like both a blessing and a curse. It’s a blessing to understand others and their emotions so deeply, but it can be challenging to claim so many feelings as your own when they never belonged to you in the first place.
Wondering if you have the unique skills presented by empaths is normal. But how do you know if you’re genuinely more empathic than most people or if you’re just occasionally overly sensitive? There are signs you can look for.
Here are 12 signs you’re more empathic than the average person:
1. You’re able to comprehend other people’s feelings
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One of the most fundamental traits of an empathic person is feeling the same things other people do. Whether you pick up on someone’s enthusiasm, confusion, or hurt makes you unique as an empath.
Dr. Judith Orloff, an expert in empathy, said that being an empath is much like serving as an “emotional sponge” to the world. Like a sponge, you soak up what you come in contact with.
But beyond feeling another person’s feelings, an especially empathic person will be able to understand those emotions. You won’t just be met with a jumble of emotions; you will be able to identify what you and someone else are feeling.
2. You’re particularly sensitive
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Anyone who feels empathy could be described as sensitive, but being extra empathic means you are even more sensitive than most people are. Many people think of sensitivity regarding emotions, but it can mean more than that.
Licensed marriage and family therapist Kim Egel said, “Empaths have a higher sensitivity to outside stimuli such as sounds, big personalities, and hectic environments. They bring a lot of heart and care to the world and feel things very deeply.”
Someone more empathic will feel especially sensitive to everything — not just feelings. Sounds, visuals, and atmospheres may be overwhelming. This could mean you are a highly sensitive person or HSP.
3. You feel drained easily
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If you feel so many different emotions, it’s only natural that you would also feel emotionally drained. Shuffling through so many emotions isn’t easy, and picking up on what many people feel isn’t either.
When you get overstimulated by the most minor things, it’s easy to feel drained. Because of this, you may need to take more time to recharge and rejuvenate. This is nothing to be ashamed of. Instead, it’s a form of self-care and a sign to the universe that you’re preparing yourself to empathize with more people.
4. You get overwhelmed in crowds
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Picking up on others’ emotions can seem helpful and even cheerful one-on-one. When conversing with a friend, understanding where they’re coming from and what they’re feeling is a gift.
But this feels the exact opposite when you’re in a large group. You’ll probably feel many emotions hitting you at once, and you’ll have to untangle them so you can focus on one at a time.
Unlike someone who is present in their own emotions or only feels the feelings of a limited number of people, being in a crowd can be overwhelming for the genuinely empathic.
Dr. Orloff said, “Let me explain the dynamics of empathy: the more people per square foot, the more our energy fields intersect — thus the tendency to become overloaded in high-density areas.” You’re simply picking up on too much at once.
5. You feel physical feelings someone is experiencing
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When we think of empathy, we tend to think of emotions. However, being empathic can extend to physical sensations and feelings as well. The Cleveland Clinic pointed out that someone who is exceptionally empathic might feel the symptoms a sick friend is experiencing. This is beyond just feeling someone else’s happiness or frustration. It could also leave you with a stomach ache, cough, sore throat, or anything else that’s ailing someone close to you.
This can be disconcerting as there is no medical reason for you to be feeling these things. You don’t have the flu or a stomach bug, but you still feel them because you feel a little bit of everything.
6. You struggle to enforce boundaries
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If you’re feeling everything someone else is, how can you possibly set a boundary with them? It’s a problem that has plagued empaths since the beginning of humanity.
Marriage and family therapist Joy Malek told PsychCentral that there are three reasons why you may struggle with boundary-setting and enforcing as an empath. “You don’t know your needs in the first place — and only realize that a boundary was necessary after the fact,” they said. “You fear that the validation you receive for being so caring and nurturing will disappear, and when you say no, others will no longer see your value. And many of the suggestions on boundary setting stress assertiveness, which to you might actually feel aggressive.”
While setting boundaries is healthy, someone who is very empathic may feel that doing so is taking a step too far and will damage the rapport you have built with someone.
7. You feel connected to animals
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When someone is genuinely empathic, it can be difficult for them to be around other people. Animals, on the other hand, are another story.
“If people drain you easily, consider adding a pet to your life,” Healthline said. “Empaths may connect to animals more intensely and draw deep comfort from this bond.”
Dr. Orloff agreed. “Though all people with loving hearts can feel their goodness, empaths are especially sensitive to absorbing the pure unconditional love that cats, dogs, and other animal companions so generously bestow,” she stated.
While humans can display complicated and conflicting emotions, pets are simply there for you. They don’t put the same strain on empaths that people sometimes can.
8. You struggle with maintaining relationships
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For many, having someone to share life with, whether romantic partners or friends, can be highly beneficial. However, someone living with the reality of being empathic may prefer to be alone. An empath's constant presence around a partner or friend drains their emotions. They always pick up on that person’s emotions and feel them strongly—perhaps even more so because of their loving connection.
Writing about romantic relationships for Psychology Today, Dr. Orloff said, “For emotional empaths to be at ease in a relationship, the traditional paradigm for coupling must be redefined. Most of all, this means asserting your personal space needs — the physical and time limits you set with someone so you don’t feel they’re on top of you.”
9. You feel a deep connection to nature
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Getting out in nature is the opposite of being in a crowded place, making it ideal for empaths. If you feel particularly empathic, it can be helpful to disconnect from those around you who are feeding you their emotions and instead be present in nature.
“Highly sensitive people and empaths typically love to be out in nature and get energized by the quiet and beauty. It’s a wonderful place for sensitive people to live. Empaths also have an intimate communion with nature, including with the earth, plants, and animals,” said Dr. Orloff. He also spoke of earth empaths, who pick up on the feelings of the natural world around them.
10. You’re creative
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A deep empathy level can also be linked to a strong creative side. University of Notre Dame professor Chris Adkins states, “Empathy begins with attention. Creativity does, too. In both cases, you pay attention to the data you take in. In Latin, attention means to ‘stretch toward.’ When you empathize with someone, you’re stretching outside of yourself and stretching into that person’s world.”
The emotions you feel because of empathy can cause you to create magnificent things, regardless of whether they are ever shared. While carrying so many emotions may feel difficult, being able to express them in such a way is beautiful.
11. You know when someone is telling the truth
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If you can sense another person’s emotions, you’ll also be able to tell if they’re being honest. When someone says they’re okay but really aren’t, you’ll know. You’ll be able to feel it.
You can also sense the discomfort of lying, big or small. The Cleveland Clinic said that rather than making people wary of you, this will show them you’re a good listener and ready to help.
12. You need relationships that help you, not harm you
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While choosing to be with someone else in any setting can sometimes be challenging because of your empathic nature, it’s essential to make sure that when you decide it’s time to connect with someone, you choose someone who will not take advantage of you.
It’s easy for someone to pour out all their problems on you and make you feel worse. It takes strength and maturity for them to do the opposite and be there for you in return. Dr. Childs said this is essential for any healthy relationship.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.