On Her 70th Birthday, A Woman Sent A Mass Email To The People She Loved & It Completely Changed The Quality Of Her Life
Instead of accepting gifts or hosting a party, she wrote an interesting email.
Halfpoint | Shutterstock.com Whether it’s past trauma, a nostalgic reminder of passing time, or simply a lonely day of forced celebrations, birthdays can be tough. Yet reframing and reclaiming the day can truly change your life.
That's exactly what 69-year-old Megan Vered did in anticipation of her 70th birthday. She reflected on the shortcomings of previous years, accepted the reality of growing older, and made a plan to move forward in her pursuit of personal fulfillment and happiness.
The now 70-year-old woman sent a mass email to all of her loved ones on her birthday, asking for a unique request instead of gifts.
“I felt motivated to do something meaningful,” she wrote. “Something personal. My objective was to do something that would sidestep the fret of sorting out a guest list, as well as the fuss of planning and hosting a party.”
Instead of sending out invitations or a list of desired birthday gifts to her friends and family, Vered wrote an email — asking them to help her craft the perfect, most fulfilling 70th year on Earth.
“Dear person I love,” her email started. “Having just rolled past 69, I am thinking about the large number looming on the horizon. To honor that large number, I want to log in 70 experiences in 2023 with the people I love.”
“My goal is to say yes to whatever you might propose,” she continued, “no matter how big or small. Anything from a cup of coffee to a trip to a national park … But please, no thrill-seeking. No roller coasters or bungee jumping. And nothing that involves a shark tank.”
"I look forward to saying yes to your proposal, to a calendar full of one-of-a-kind events, and to fully enjoying memorable moments with you," she concluded in her email.
Instead of birthday gifts, she asked her friends and family to propose 70 experiences during the year.
“Their job: to propose. My job: to say yes,” Vered told HuffPost in her personal essay. Instead of asking for birthday gifts, typically material things she uses once or twice, she sought out a year full of fulfilling experiences with her friends and family.
She set out to accomplish around six social events a month — weaving coffee dates, art fairs, and quality time into her schedule.
“My year was filled to the rim,” she admitted. “I carved out intentional time to have fun … To my surprise, most of the experiences that rose to the top were within driving distance of my home, did not break the bank, and most important, with each experience, I learned something about myself and made a memory.”
Alongside her plans, Vered kept a journal — detailing her experiences with friends, while crafting the “fulfilling personal happiness” she’d hoped to achieve with her next trip around the sun.
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It’s a tradition she hopes readers of all ages will be encouraged to adopt instead of harboring an isolated consumerist idea about birthday celebrations.
“The process was a breeze: 1) count the number of days you’ve been on the planet; 2) compose an email, setting an intention that expands your comfort zone, even if only a wee bit; 3) send it to your people,” she recounted.
If you’re searching for fulfillment (with less frequent social events), consider planning a year of ‘DIY’ experiences.
For those with a less extensive group of friends — Vered's was 70 years in the making, after all — consider an alternative, more personal approach to crafting a year of fulfillment and fun.
“Set your bar to match your milestone, and let the fun begin,” Vered suggested. “Create a certain number of ethnic meals, learn songs in other languages, recite poems by your favorite poet, or crest never-hiked mountains. Use your birthday to browse through the continuing education catalog of life.”
Not everything has to be a social endeavor. You can dedicate the year to personal fulfillment, alone time, and crafting your unique identity.
While birthdays can be a momentary celebration of life — filled with presents, parties, and a day of connection — they’re also a chance to start fresh, create new goals, and reframe your mind.
Content creator and author Eli Rallo shared that she’s reframed her birthday to be “her personal New Year’s Day.”
“This is the day that I arrived on this Earth,” she said. “Every year, it’s a really good check-in with my goals…To reset and reframe, think about what I want to do differently next year; decide what my intentions are. It’s a beautiful metaphorical thing.”
For some, that might be creating new habits; for others, like Vered, it might mean crafting intentional time for experiences. Both can be hugely beneficial.
“Having crossed the threshold to 70, I feel full,” Vered honestly said, “not in a cake-and-ice-cream way, but filled with memories of a year well spent … though I may slow down with age, neither my dazzle nor my friendships have dimmed.”
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a News & Entertainment Writer at YourTango who focuses on health & wellness, social policy, and human interest stories.