The Psychological Trick Confident People Use To Overcome Fears Of Not Being Good Enough
Break the insecurity habit.
Rido / Shutterstock Insecurities are one of the hardest things we deal with daily. The challenge is compounded by knowing that if we talk about our insecurities, it is rarely helpful.
There’s a common acceptance of insecure thoughts being a normal part of life. Something we’re just stuck with and have to deal with. What if it doesn’t have to be this way?
Psychologist Dr. Amanda Hanson discusses how our insecure thoughts are just bad habits, insisting that we can break these bad habits and reframe our mindset using a few different techniques.
How to overcome the fears that you're not good enough
Confident people reframe insecurities as bad habits to be broken
Dr. Hanson explains, "It's a story you've been telling yourself for so long you might not even believe the inverse could be possible."
You've convinced yourself the insecurity is the way it's meant to be. You're meant to feel this way and it can't be changed. This false narrative you created is a bad habit, as explored in a 2023 study. If there's a way to create these insecurities, there's also a way to destroy them.
Dr. Hanson continues, "It's really about creating a different narrative. Inserting that faulty belief system that has now become a habit with something that is probably more true." But, how do we get there? Well, it starts by redesigning your reality.
Surround yourself with people who aren't living in insecurity or low vibration, people who talk to themselves positively and view themselves in a beautiful light. People who don't have limited belief systems and are always looking for ways to improve.
As Dr. Hanson points out, "If we simply sit around waiting for insecurities to dissipate, they won't. It creates us building the confidence within." Just like our insecurities are a habit, confidence is also a habit we can build.
Stop the comparisons
What are some other ways to build it besides changing our environment? Licensed clinical social worker Amy Morin has some suggestions.
Self-comparison is the best way to destroy anyone's confidence. According to Morin, "Research shows that the more envy people experience when they make comparisons, the worse they feel about themselves."
So, if you want to avoid self-comparison, choose to view others as inspirations rather than competition. Be curious and reach out to them and find better ways to improve yourself.
Take care of your body
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People often underestimate how important taking care of yourself is. It's difficult to feel good about yourself if you aren't actively putting yourself first. Which is why, "Eating healthy, exercising, meditating, and getting plenty of sleep are all keys to helping you feel your best," writes Morin.
Don't forget every little step matters! 30 minutes a day to invest in yourself can make all the difference in the world, you can even break those 30 minutes into 10 minutes three times a day to rewire your new good confident habits.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, and family topics.