5 Psychological Self-Love Techniques That Can Improve Your Life
Adopting these habits will improve your relationship with yourself.
SolStock / Canva Pro A prevalent problem present in modern society is a lack of self-love that people have collectively normalized.
We live in a world where people frequently struggle with their image and their appearance. People are constantly comparing themselves to others, there is little work-life balance and people are not prioritizing their needs and self-care the way they should.
Some of us have gotten so stuck in our minds and fallen prey to our negative self-talk that we have lost sight of the significance of loving ourselves.
Here are 5 psychological techniques that can help you learn how to foster more love for yourself.
1. Treat yourself the way you would treat the person you love the most.
If we can experience strong feelings of love for others, then surely we are capable of applying that same love to ourselves.
Kenneth, a content creator, and life engineer, walked viewers through a mental action road map where they could use their imagination to reconnect with themselves. He told viewers to imagine swapping bodies with someone they love deeply.
“Being given the responsibility of taking care of their body, and their responsibilities, their life, how would you treat it?” Kenneth asked.
Kenneth used the example of learning that the person you love wants to eat better and exercise more, but they can’t seem to find the motivation. You might struggle with a similar problem. Yet, if you had the chance to spend a year in their body, you would likely do everything in your power to accomplish these goals.
This imaginative activity pushed the ultimate question: Why is it that we pour so much energy and care into the ones we love, yet lack those same values when it comes to our own needs?
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It isn’t easy to step outside your mind and combat the toxicity of negative thought patterns, but it can be learned through practice, dedication, and effort. In fact, actively showing yourself love will strengthen your ability to love others.
By putting yourself in the shoes of someone you love, you’re able to envision the importance of showing up for yourself. This mentality really puts the power of perception into perspective.
2. Write down your intentions and goals to alter your perspective and manifest them into reality.
This does not have to be an elaborate, complex list. Simply observe what your intentions and goals in life are. Write whatever comes from the heart and feels right.
Experts suggest that writing out what you aspire for in life will alter your perspective of these goals and inspire you to take action. Take some time at the beginning or end of your day to jot these thoughts down, and you will gradually notice a shift in your energy levels when it comes to completing tasks and responsibilities. You’ll begin to feel balanced and aligned with your highest purpose, and you’ll be able to perceive challenges with a positive approach and a sense of clarity.
By having this fresh perspective and training your mind to trust that everything will fall into place, these intentions and goals will manifest into reality, according to a manifestation coach who goes by 111moonchild on TikTok.
It may seem tedious, but writing your intentions down on paper will organize your mind and give you a clearer understanding of who you are. With time and consistency, this healthy habit will bring you closer to your connection with yourself.
3. Tell yourself you are worthy of celebrating.
As many of us are already aware, we are our own worst critic, and we live in a society that finds shame in celebrating the small steps.
Emilie Leyes, a brain-training specialist, took to TikTok to share ways to cultivate more self-love. She said one of the most effective ways to do so is by “celebrating yourself as often as you can.”
If you feel impatient with yourself for not reaching your goals as soon as you’d like to, or you’re hard on yourself for not achieving more, Leyes explained how the process of accomplishing a goal is made up of small steps along the way, and it’s important to celebrate each of those steps.
To put it into perspective, think back to how you would respond to a loved one’s feelings of unworthiness. If you’re like most empathetic people, you would remind them to trust the process and be proud of the hard work they have already put in. You would let them know they are worthy of being celebrated. The same applies to yourself.
“Taking time to recognize that you are worthy of celebrating, no matter what you’re doing, no matter where you are in your life, can really help you learn how to love yourself,” Leyes expressed.
Leyes suggested using physical activity to celebrate yourself, like giving yourself a hug or dancing to your favorite song, which will rewire your brain to believe you deserve celebration.
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Allowing yourself to be proud of yourself for each of your accomplishments, whether you sent an email or made yourself breakfast, is a form of self-love. Having this compassion for yourself will naturally improve your productivity and motivation.
4. Embrace your unique inner qualities that make you who you are.
Everyone has their own skills, strengths, and talents that set them apart from the rest. By embracing the qualities that make you who you are, you are allowing yourself to foster self-confidence and self-love.
“The more you put your focused attention on the resources that you have, the more your brain is going to recognize that you are worthy,” Leyes shared.
Simi Anand, the host of her podcast, "The Simi Anand Show," posted a video on TikTok emphasizing the importance of embracing your individual traits.
“You don't need to fit into what feels normal, because normal is subjective,” Anand explained. “You can carve out your own version of normal by embracing every single quality, trait, and character that you know makes you special.”
Welcoming each of your quirky qualities, talents, and even your flaws, with open arms will lead you to a life of authenticity and self-acceptance.
5. Ask yourself how you want to feel in life and prioritize that.
For a moment, don’t worry about the goals you want to accomplish, or what profession you want to pursue. Think about how you want to feel in life. Do you want to feel relaxed and at ease, or excited and adventurous? Or do you want to feel creative and inspired?
Take some time with yourself to evaluate what feelings matter most to you, and build your life around those values.
Leyes suggested remembering the moments in your life when you experienced feelings that ignited your spark.
“Take a couple minutes to visualize that memory as though it’s happening right now,” she said. “The subconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between imagination and reality, which means it will help you access those feelings right now.”
This psychological technique will reframe your mindset to perceive your life with a focus on what makes you feel aligned with your calling, as opposed to what you think you should be doing. We all have responsibilities and goals, but it’s important to prioritize authenticity over image.
As a matter of fact, the emotional significance of an experience plays a huge role in our memory of these events.
At the end of the day, prioritizing the way you want to feel in life is what will guide you toward living a life rich in self-love.
The process of practicing self-love requires conscious effort and commitment.
Express gratitude for the beauty in your life and yourself, and remember to seek support when necessary.
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The relationship you have with yourself sets the tone for all other relationships and experiences in your life.
By incorporating these techniques into your routines, you can nurture a more compassionate and resilient mindset, ultimately leading to a fulfilling life.
Francesca Duarte is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. She covers lifestyle, human-interest, and spirituality topics.