10 Phrases Truly Caring People Say Often, According To Psychology
When someone is genuinely concerned with the well-being of others, their words let you know.
Andrii Nekrasov | Shutterstock.com One of the best ways to know if someone is a truly caring person is to listen to the phrases they say often. While it’s pretty easy to identify some of the truly caring people in your personal life, it can be more difficult to ascertain the extent of the caring nature of our neighbors or strangers we encounter in public.
Caring about others might come naturally to some, but according to a report from Harvard’s Making Caring Common Project, many Americans struggle to feel "substantial concern for people who are different from them in background and character," and also "struggle to extend compassion when others disappoint them or make mistakes and fail to treat as fully human those with whom they disagree."
If you want to know whether or not someone is a truly caring person, listen close to what they have to say on a regular basis.
Here are 10 phrases truly caring people say often, according to psychology
1. "It’s OK to feel this way."
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Important and impactful research, like a a study published in School Psychology Review on the experiences of Black boys in the classroom, argues that “safe spaces” are incredibly profound, especially early in life, in shaping our vulnerability, behavioral tendencies, and emotional intelligence in adulthood.
When we have empathetic leaders, a community, peers with shared experiences, and compassion, we’re affirmed in our identity, self-esteem, and more likely to navigate adulthood with healthy coping mechanisms, supportive relationships, and an impactful sense of self-awareness.
People who let you. know it's OK to feel the way you feel understand that without emotional support or validation, we struggle to find acceptance and may slip into harmful isolation.
2. "I can understand how that would be frustrating."
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The power of empathy, especially when it comes to supporting other people’s vulnerability and sharing phrases like this one, is that it makes others feel validated. When we pour out our hearts to someone, only to hear an exacerbated or inauthentic “your feelings are valid” back, it not only makes us feel unheard, but, ironically, uncared for.
Shared experiences can be powerfully validating in our relationships, but only when they’re shared genuinely with someone who’s not only actively listening to you, but committed to sharing your grief, acknowledging your emotions, and supporting your growth. All of that starts with genuine understanding — or at the very least, being committed to trying to understand.
3. "I’m here for you."
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Holding space for other people emotionally, whether that’s through active support and listening or by cultivating a non-judgemental atmosphere, can help to establish a healthy connection and reduce the stress and anxiety of others. A phrase as simple as, “I’m here for you” can be profound, especially when used by a truly caring person who’s willing to sacrifice some of their time and energy to help others.
Of course, a delicate balance of listening and emotional validation is necessary in all shared connections — one person can’t bear the burden of support 100% of the time — but many truly empathetic people find ways to make that flow natural in their relationships.
4. "What can I do to help you?"
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A research review published in Current Opinion in Psychology argues that emotional and social support can not only be impactful for harnessing powerful healthy relationships and connections, but in promoting physical health. Genuinely caring and empathetic people may not grasp how impactful their support is, but it’s phrases like this that help lessen the burden of intense emotions and concern.
By sharing emotional burdens, providing support when needed, and acknowledging other people’s struggles and pain, they’re removing the isolating nature of complex internal turmoil — and that’s profoundly influential.
5. "Would you like me to listen or share my advice?"
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Especially in friendships and comfortable relationships, it’s easy to forgo genuine listening and empathy and skip right to solution-oriented conversations. When someone shares a relationship qualm or a struggle in their daily life, we immediately share advice, even if they other person isn't looking for it.
It may come from a place of genuine concern and care, but more often than not, we’re cutting off the space for others to share their genuine emotions without judgment, or without the inherent need for something to be changed or fixed.
This is one of the most impactful phrases truly caring people say, because it gives people the autonomy of choice — are they looking for concern, advice, and solutions, or are they looking to be heard?
6. "Thank you for sharing this with me."
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We’re all human, and it’s only human nature to seek a sense of connection with others, even if it’s in the middle of an interaction or while sharing vulnerable emotions. We find peace in empathy, pride in compassion, and trust and reassurance in understanding from truly caring people in our lives.
Research on practicing gratitude published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that the phrases truly caring people say, like this one, are impactful in cultivating healthy social interactions, not only because they promote positive emotions, but also because they help to solve concerns of sustainability in connections and relationships.
7. "I'm proud of you."
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Whether these words are directed toward you by a friend, a parent, or a boss, the positive emotions associated with pride are powerful and profound, often sparking a cycle of empathy and care. This cycle of social empowerment, as explained by the authors of “The Self Conscious Emotions: Theory and Research,” is sparked by the pleasurable feelings associated with feeling pride.
Empowered people are more likely to engage in “prosocial behaviors” that elicit prideful emotions like caregiving or achievement — in other words, the people using this phrase are truly caring for others.
Truly caring people express pride in others because they know how powerful that is on both ends of an interaction.
8. "You don’t have to justify what you did or why."
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A study from the book “Philosophy and Phenomenological Research” argues that emotions and feelings can often only be understood in the context of the mental state you were in when you felt them. So, who is to say that you’re responsible for explaining them in an entirely different context or situation? If you made a decision, made a comment, or felt a certain emotion, you shouldn’t be burdened with explaining that later on — you felt what you felt.
That’s exactly why this is one of the most common phrases truly caring people say often. It helps others feel validated in their responses and heard in their frustrations when you accept their unique feelings.
9. "If that happened to me, I’d feel the same way."
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Many people underestimate the power of shared experiences, community, and connection, even in seemingly minuscule ways during a conversation or a passing interaction. By acknowledging another person’s feelings and bonding over a shared experience, relatability, or emotion, the burden of intense emotions can be shared.
People bond over shared experiences that may be otherwise isolating on their own. From discrimination to bullying to navigating uncomfortable relationships, these experiences can feel “othering” or disconnecting when they’re not acknowledged by someone who truly cares.
10. "I can see it’s right there on the surface."
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Especially impactful for people struggling to open up or express genuinely vulnerable feelings, this phrase can give people the opportunity to share their hidden emotions comfortably and openly without the threat of judgment.
A truly caring person might use this phrase when someone is on the verge of crying or struggling to verbalize what they’re feeling — it’s simply an acknowledgement that they’re safe, supported, and loved enough to express their pain, frustration, or anger in whatever way they need to. It’s the power of sharing in solidarity, as research published in Gender, Work, & Organization explains, that allows people to feel empowered in expressing their most vulnerable emotions and experiences.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a News & Entertainment Writer at YourTango who focuses on health and wellness, social policy, and human interest stories