11 Phrases Socially Intelligent People Use To Create An Instant Bond
Social intelligence gives you huge advantage.
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock We can all benefit from building stronger relationships. After all, your ability to form these connections can be the difference between success and failure, as these spontaneous bonds help open up more opportunities later down the road.
But reaching that level of comfort isn’t always easy. Luckily, there are certain phrases you can use to form deep, lasting connections with everyone you meet.
Here are 11 phrases socially intelligent people use to create an instant bond
1. 'I can totally relate'
fizkes | Shutterstock
If you want to form an instant bond with someone, you need to master the art of being relatable. We are drawn to familiar people, with one study finding that people prefer familiar faces over unfamiliar ones. And really, it has a lot to do with comfortability.
Meeting a stranger is already uncomfortable, but when we have a sense of familiarity, it can make forming a bond a whole lot easier. Now, that doesn't mean we should go out and change our faces, but by saying, "I can totally relate," you're establishing a commonality with the other person, making it a lot easier to form an instant connection.
2. 'What are your thoughts on this?'
fizkes | Shutterstock
People love to talk about themselves, but more than that, people love feeling as if their opinions and ideas matter. When you ask someone, "What are your thoughts on this?" you're essentially opening up the door for them to express themselves, which can put them in a happier mood.
In fact, research suggests that social interactions with others boosts our mood. And a boost in mood can be the difference between forming an instantaneous bond or not forming one at all.
3. 'I see where you're coming from'
RDNE Stock project | Pexels
It's frustrating when you feel like your opinions or ideas aren't being understood or heard. After all, we all want to feel important. So, when you go out of your way to validate someone else, this can help form a bond.
Validating someone else's emotions helps them to better regulate their own emotions. Multiple studies have collectively found that "invalidation escalates emotion, whereas validation may decrease emotion or not impact emotion at all." This small act of kindness can turn into gratefulness, making it much easier to form a bond with someone.
4. 'Can you help me better understand?'
Vanessa Garcia | Pexels
It's okay to admit when you don't know everything, and nobody understands this better than someone who's socially intelligent. People with social intelligence know how to make the most of a bad situation — and own it.
As a matter of fact, one study determined that people who admitted to making a mistake on Facebook were more likely to be viewed as competent and admirable. So, if you don't know something, be honest.
Say, "Can you help me better understand this?" Most likely, doing this will earn you extra brownie points and help you form a possible new relationship.
5. 'Let's solve this problem together'
LightField Studios | Shutterstock
Teamwork makes the dream work, as they say, and socially intelligent people understand this. They know that working as a team is the best way to improve connection and communication.
But that's not all. Research shows that working together as a team boosts problem-solving skills as a whole, making the problem-solving process easier, smoother, and more efficient. And when you prove to someone that you have these abilities, it makes it more likely to form a connection.
6. 'I really admire how you...'
Mental Health America (MHA) | Pexels
Did you know that helping others can help increase your happiness? According to one study, happiness increased when people performed random acts of kindness for seven days straight. And when people are happier around you, it's much easier to form a relationship.
The next time you're talking to someone, don't be afraid to do what socially intelligent people do and say, "I really admire this about you." Chances are they'll appreciate your compliment and feel a closer connection to you because of it.
7. 'Thanks for the help on this'
Pressmaster | Shutterstock
Socially intelligent people are appreciative of others, and there's a good reason for it. Not only is it the polite thing to do, but expressing gratitude helps improve mental health and has a lasting change in perspective.
This combined benefit makes it easier for socially intelligent people to easily form relationships with others. And even if you don't consider yourself to be especially socially intelligent, practicing gratitude, particularly with people you've just met, can make it easier to make a lasting impression.
8. 'I feel this way'
Andrea Piacquadio | Pexels
They say that honesty is the best policy and, in some cases, they'd be right. Being able to be honest with someone makes it a lot easier for them to trust you. It's something those with social intelligence fully understand.
If you're better able to trust someone, it makes it less complicated to connect with them on a deeper level. After all, people usually don't open up and become vulnerable with someone they don't completely trust.
9. 'Sorry you have to go through this'
Andrea Piacquadio | Pexels
Don't be afraid to be empathetic or compassionate to other people's struggles. As a matter of fact, they might appreciate you more for it.
Researchers viewed the relationships between compassion and empathy, finding that cancer patients "Reported both empathy and compassion as having a positive effect on their care experiences, allowing them to feel heard, understood, and validated."
By offering someone empathy, you're showing that you understand what they are going through, and can lend a helping hand or listening ear when necessary.
10. 'You're absolutely right'
Zen Chung | Pexels
Being able to admit that someone else is right is great for a multitude of reasons. People view those who honestly admit to their mistakes as competent and admirable. And when you're perceived this way, it makes it more likely that people will confide in you.
However, there's more to it. Admitting that you're wrong and that someone else is right makes them respect you, helping you to build a better connection with them.
11. 'That's a great point'
MART PRODUCTION | Pexels
Not only does this phrase validate someone else's experiences or ideas, it also opens up the door for them to further express or explain themselves. They aren't going to do so if they are speaking with someone who is dismissive or acts superior.
If they're comfortable with this, they unconsciously begin to feel more connected to you, as you continuously show that you're actively listening and genuinely interested in what they're saying.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.