11 Phrases That Put People Trying To Make You Feel Inferior In Their Place
Don't ever let anybody dull your shine with their cruel words.
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock Throughout your relationships in life — with friends, family, coworkers, or even acquaintances — you might find them attempting to belittle you. Whether it's their condescension towards your choices or beliefs, there are certain phrases that put people trying to make you feel inferior in their place for good.
After spending so long trying to figure out what to say, the time for staying quiet is over, replaced with room to stand up for yourself. Because sometimes, sharp, biting words are necessary to show people that you won't take their rude comments sitting down.
Here are 11 phrases that put people trying to make you feel inferior in their place
1. 'Thanks for the input, but I'm confident in myself'
piksekstock | Shutterstock
People will voice their opinions, even if it's unwanted. Thinking they know best, they'll tell you where to invest your money or what type of partners to avoid. Though frustrating, in their eyes, they know better because they think they have more experience.
However, not everyone desires the same things out of life. Some people want simplicity while others want the world at their fingertips. Saying, "Thanks for the input, but I'm confident in myself" puts someone who feels superior in their place. It reveals that they may be barking up the wrong tree, and should keep their belittling comments to themselves.
2. 'Can you explain that to me?'
fizkes | Shutterstock
When someone tries to knock you down, they'll make snide remarks while smiling from ear to ear. In their mind, they don't think much of it because they've likely never been called out before. Instead, the people around them chose to walk on eggshells to maintain the peace.
But one of the best phrases that put people trying to make you feel inferior in their place is "Can you explain that to me?" It not only makes them rethink their words, but is a sign of assertiveness on your part.
According to psychotherapist Moshe Ratson, MBA, LMFT, assertiveness is power, and can enhance communication and overall well-being. "Being assertive about what you want affirms your right to want what you want, even if there's little chance of getting it. When you understand your right to be who you are and ask for what you need, and at the same time you are flexible in your expectations about what you will actually get, you are able to be real and authentic and less attached to the outcome," Ratson says.
Even if it's uncomfortable, standing up for yourself and being assertive is the only way to put someone else in their place, especially if they are trying to put you down because they feel superior.
3. 'I don't need anyone's validation'
insta_photos | Shutterstock
Often, when someone is looking to make you feel inferior, they'll try to bring you down a notch, bringing up your biggest insecurities and finding ways to rub those supposed flaws in your face. Though it's upsetting, it's important to stay composed and calm in this situation.
According to a study published in the Journal of Applied Psychology, people who encounter snarky or rude individuals waste too much negative energy trying to interpret their intentions. This then creates negative emotions and behavior.
Instead of wasting your energy, take your power back. Take a deep breath and ground yourself before responding with, "I don't need anyone's validation."
4. 'Yes, and?'
fizkes | Shutterstock
People who want to make you feel inferior will bring up past mishaps to make you feel bad about yourself. They'll talk about your actions and hold them against you, without paying attention to how you've grown and learned from your mistakes. It's easy to snap or allow their judgemental remarks to get the better of you, but that's exactly what they want.
Losing control of your emotions is how you unconsciously let people take control over you. Instead, it's best to find ways to ground yourself before responding.
According to author and licensed clinical social worker Robert Taibbi, taking deep breaths and paying attention to the environment, rather than the person, is a great place to start. Once you have those emotions under control simply say, "Yes, and?" This will likely throw the belittler off their guard, allowing you to get away from the conversation and distance yourself completely.
5. 'I'll handle this my own way'
AYO Production | Shutterstock
It's really frustrating when people try to force their way into your life. They'll get up in your personal space and ask questions that would make anyone feel uncomfortable. On the surface, it might sound like they're being helpful, but they likely just believe that you can't handle the challenge by yourself, which is why they feel justified in stepping in.
It's essential in these moments to stay cool and reiterate that you can handle any challenges that come your way. Not only does this put the other person in their place, but it also makes you feel capable within yourself.
A study published in the Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology found that believing in oneself and having self-efficacy leads to both psychological and physical well-being. It also greatly helps in self-regulation. All things considered, believing in yourself is the best route to go to put those who doubt you (and secretly see you as inferior) in their place.
6. 'Does that make you feel better about yourself?'
Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock
People who feel superior will bring you down to prove they are better than you. They'll gloat about their successes while reminding you of your failures. But rather than tell them off, it's best to put the pressure back on them, saying something like, "Does that make you feel better about yourself?"
You're removing yourself from a situation where you react negatively, effectively "proving their point" that they are more mature or better than you. But staying calm won't allow them to hold that power over you.
According to a study published in Personality and Individual Differences, narcissists who attempt to alleviate themselves might do so because they're insecure and have low self-esteem. In this instance, the person trying to bring you down may be a narcissist, in which case, their words are meant to make you feel insecure and hurt you. But don't let them.
7. 'My goal isn't to impress you'
MAYA LAB | Shutterstock
Though this phrase might seem cold, sometimes people need a reminder that your world doesn't revolve around their opinions. People who want to make you feel inferior truly believe that their opinions are more important than other people's wants and desires. This creates a false sense of superiority, where they struggle to see the reality right in front of them.
So, remind them of their place in your life. Saying, "My goal isn't to impress you," shows them that their opinions aren't that high on your consideration list. This will shock them and cause them to become silent or stutter out weak excuses, allowing you to control the situation and regain your power.
8. 'I didn't quite catch that, can you repeat it?'
fizkes | Shutterstock
Some people do their best to catch you off-guard by being rude. They'll make passive-aggressive remarks or give backhanded compliments to get a rise out of you. It's easy to allow your emotions to get the better of you or to freeze up, but one of the best phrases that put people trying to make you feel inferior in their place is actually a question: "I didn't quite catch that, can you repeat it?"
By asking someone to repeat themselves in this way, you're essentially getting them to admit the truth of how they really feel. However, too intimidated to admit to it, most people with a superiority complex will freeze up and correct themselves to save face.
9. 'I won't sit here and tolerate your disrespect'
Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock
When people go too far in their attempts to make you feel inferior, bringing up old wounds or reminding you of something in your past that you'd rather forget, it can push you over the edge. Feeling embarrassed, you might leave the room with a flushed face and a racing heart. But before you leave, it's important to tell them how you really feel.
Saying, "I won't sit here and tolerate your disrespect," makes it known that you're offended and aren't backing down from your feelings. Most of the time, the other person won't expect it and will stutter trying to backpedal. However, standing on business and leaving the room afterward shows your commitment to yourself, and your unwillingness to let bygones be bygones without a proper apology.
10. 'Do you talk to other people this way?'
Mangostar | Shutterstock
Sometimes, you have to remind people that you won't be spoken down to. Cruel people will take your kind nature for granted and disrespect you to make themselves look better. It's not good behavior, but many people do this because they assume you'd never fight back.
By saying, "Do you talk to other people this way?" you're speaking up for yourself. Pointing out their disrespect will get them to straighten up fast, and likely act like what they said wasn't offensive to begin with. But it shows that you have immense respect for yourself.
And loving yourself and having that self-compassion to respect yourself will only benefit you in the end. As research from the University of Texas at Austin found, greater self-compassion is linked to lower depression and anxiety.
11. 'I don't see it that way'
fizkes | Shutterstock
Wasting your breath arguing with someone just isn't worth it at times. After all, you probably won't change their mind, and they won't change yours. But when someone is dead-set on their views and holds no space for yours, it's best to use one of the phrases that put people trying to make you feel inferior in their place.
Though people are stubborn and don't always want to admit when they're wrong, when you can't reach any conclusion, it's important to call it quits and simply say, "I don't see it that way." This keeps your sanity intact and makes you look like a better person. That's because knowing when to stop arguing is a huge sign that someone has high emotional intelligence. And that's something a condescending person can't argue with.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.