8 Phrases That Put An Arrogant Person In Their Place, According To Psychology
You don't have to sit there in silence while that arrogant person tries to walk all over you.
Shutterstock / voronaman It’s unfortunate, but at some point in their life pretty much everyone will have to deal with an arrogant person, and when you do, using these phrases can put them in their place.
During these tough moments, you it's common to want to speak up and defend yourself or tell the other person off, but knowing what you can say that will actually be effective isn't always easy. It can be understandably tough to keep your cool when someone who thinks they are better than everyone is pushing your buttons, but having an idea of what you'll say in your back pocket can help you keep your cool.
Psychologists say there are three basic types of arrogance: individual, comparative, and antagonistic. Depending on the type of arrogance you're dealing with, you may need to say something that will redirect them, make them feel heard, or let them know they have over-stepped boundaries.
Here are the eight phrases that put an arrogant person in their place, according to psychology
1. "Your confidence in yourself capabilities is noted"
fizkes | Shutterstock
This phrase said in a deadpan tone is the best way to both acknowledge the arrogant person’s opinion while simultaneously rejecting it. This can subtly avoid drama or making the situation worse.
Alex Lickerman, M.D., notes that no matter what we say, the tone we use communicates what we're feeling when we say it. By staying calm and firm while letting even an overly confident person know that you have heard what they had to say, you are letting them know you cannot and will not be bullied into agreement.
2. "Let’s focus on the task at hand"
insta_photos | Shutterstock
It can be downright frustrating when someone’s arrogance keeps distracting from the main task at hand. During moments like these, it's easy to allow emotions to run rapid and yell something like, "Will you please be quiet?"
It is far more effective, however, to simply redirect their energy. By repeating the phrase, "Let's focus on the task at hand," you have a better chance to get done what you need to get done instead of getting into a fight.
Research suggests that "politeness plays a significant role in negotiations." So when putting an arrogant person in their place, be polite can help you both stay on track.
3. "That’s fascinating! Moving on..."
fizkes | Shutterstock
Most of us are constantly busy and don’t have time to sit down and discuss the arrogant person's poor behavior. By saying, "That's fascinating," you acknowledge the other person's point and make them feel good about themselves. And when you combine it with "Moving on," you're essentially letting them know it isn't all about them and the conversation needs to keep going.
So, if the goal is to put an arrogant person in their place, then it's best to make them feel important but also let them know there is more to what is being discussed than just them.
4. "Is that relevant to the conversation?"
Shift Drive | Shutterstock
Sometimes arrogant people say out-of-pocket comments. They might talk about their skills or boast about how great their life is. It's unfortunate, but many arrogant people don't realize their constant stream of unnecessary comments impact others more than they realize.
One study published in Social Cognition found that reversing a bad first impression is harder than forming a good one. Researchers found that participants were more likely to assume that Barbara (an imaginary person) was less likely to change due to her bad first impression.
The researchers concluded that it would take more weeks to reverse that bad first impression compared to forming a good first impression.
This is why people shouldn't feel too bad for using this phrase. Though a bit rude, they’re doing arrogant people a favor by calling out their behavior, helping them save face before they make a mockery out of themselves.
5. "Well, I value your perspective"
Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock
There's nothing more satisfying than saying, "Well, I value your perspective," to put an arrogant person in their place.
At first glance, most people might not see anything wrong with this phrase. But the inclusion of "well" is the difference between being meek and being direct.
By uttering "well," you're pausing. According to businessman and multi-award winning public speaker John Zimmer, pausing helps people reflect on what was said and how it's relevant. Combine this with a sarcastic tone, and the arrogant person will better understand what you're actually saying and feel embarrassed for being disrespectful.
6. "It’s okay to not know everything"
insta_photos | Shutterstock
Another phrase that puts an arrogant person in their place is, "It's okay to not know everything."
On the surface, this might sound like an encouraging or considerate thing to say. However, in context, this is essentially telling an arrogant person, "You don't know everything, so please stop."
In the moment this will definitely leave an arrogant person embarrassed as they grapple with how to respond. But if someone really wants to empathize their frustrations they can pretend to be sympathetic or give them a little pat on the back.
All of this combined will leave the other person stunned and effectively shut the conversation down for good.
7. "That’s one way to look at it"
Pheelings media | Shutterstock
Another phrase that puts an arrogant person in their place is, "That's one way to look at it." This phrase is a great way to show how annoyed and fed up you are with the arrogant person's behavior. It can also be used to express how much you dislike their idea or opinion.
It might be slightly rude, research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that expressing contempt shows superiority over others and causes an increase in the status for those expressing it and a decrease in those receiving it.
That being said, don't feel bad for uttering the phrase. Understand that most arrogant people have little regard for those around them. So, why should anyone else have regard for them?
8. "Let’s hear what other people have to say"
Aruta Images | Shutterstock
Arrogant people feel entitled to own whatever room they're in. By not allowing other people to speak, arrogant people steel in the spotlight.
A lack of diverse opinions doesn't lead to the best outcome. Researcher and associate professor at Boston University Evan Apfelbaum explains that diverse groups make vigorous decisions, which leads to fewer mistakes.
This is why it's important to call out arrogant people when they talk over others. Not only is their behavior disrespectful, but it also prevents collaboration, which leads to worse results.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers topics such as self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology.