The One Habit Stronger Than Willpower That We All Possess — But Oddly Never Use
The habit that's significantly stronger than motivation.
View more by urbazon | Canva Even pinching my thigh to a bloody mess didn’t help. 1 AM. New city. Deserted roads. My girlfriend sleeping on my shoulder. A shady-looking taxi driver.
The drowsiness was intoxicating. Shifting her weight, my girl snuggled onto my chest. Then, an overpowering surge of love snapped me awake.
Like caffeine on steroids, it vaporizes the drowsiness. Cradling her head and caressing her hair, I stayed hyper-alert for the rest of the ride. Because I now had a mission — to keep her safe at any cost.
Frost-bitten toes. Gangrenous wounds. The acrid stench of death. Inhuman starvation. Grueling soul-taxing labor. While most Holocaust prisoners gave up, Viktor Frankl persevered.
Will-power wasn’t the secret. A strong purpose was — the intense love for his wife and the meager hope of reuniting with her.
Fueled by this purpose, he took it upon himself to help other prisoners find their why. "Those who have a ‘why’ to live, can bear with almost any 'how.'"― Frankl quoting Nietzsche
Frankl would later pioneer the groundbreaking psychological discovery that our #1 driving force is the Will to Meaning. A powerful "Why?" puts willpower and motivation to utter shame. Having a purpose in life can help aid in depression and stressful situations, and lead to a happier life, confirms research from 2019.
Hate can power a strong purpose. So can jealousy — vengeance is even more potent. But a negative-driven purpose devours you in the process.
Chinmay Singh / Pexels
The strongest purpose stems from love — mothers are living proof of this.
While one mom saved her daughter from a black bear, another jumped from a second-story fire clutching her baby. In intense fight-or-flight moments, our body amps up the adrenaline.
How can I forget my mother? She raised us two boys on her own in a new city with zero friends — and zero knowledge of the local language.
1000s of aspiring writers start mincing words every year — only to go AWOL within a few months. Only 5% make it past the first year — 1% past the second, and 0.1% past the fifth year.
I’m lazy and lack iron willpower — but I’m part of that 1%. Because I love writing so much that I can’t not write. When I wasn’t getting paid, I wrote. When I earned peanuts, I wrote. When my views sucked, I wrote. The greats in any field love their work to the point of obsession.
Phelps is more dolphin than human. Ayodeji Awosika writes 5000+ words every day. Such love blasts motivation, fear, willpower, and uncertainty out of the water. Don’t do what you love, instead love what you do.
Tirachard Kumtanom / Pexels
Find meaning and purpose in every frustrating errand, unruly person, and curveball in life.
"Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life" sounds good, but it isn’t realistic. Because external forces outside our control tend to control over 90% of our lives.
By loving what and whatever you do, you unlock infinite love. Everything and everyone becomes meaningful.
You’ll appreciate the dew drops glistening on a sunny morning as much as that 40% job hike you’ve long deserved. By living a mindful life, you peel layer after layer of life — and reach your ultimate purpose.
Neeramitra Reddy is a writer and editor of In Fitness And Health, Wholistique, and MANXIMIZE. His work has also been featured on Medium, The Startup, and The Good Men Project.